Tags
abundance, birth control, career woman, children, co-parenting, parenting, red pill, SAHM, single parenting, stay at home mom
Last night I had a friend, her two daughters, and her two nieces over for a BBQ and I realized something very strange — somehow six kids are a lot easier than two!
Let me explain, I have a 10-year-old and a 4-year-old. She has a 10-year-old and a 7-year-old. Her sister-in-law’s kids are 7 and 4. So just by chance, for once, everyone had a playmate! And so play they did, not one bit of whining, complaining, or “I’m bored” to be heard, for hours. But there was a lot of happy little girl ear piercing screeching, laughter, and frivolity!
My friend and I got to simply sit and relax, a rare occasion for us both. That’s when it struck me — more kids are somehow easier than few.
My babysitter, who I have talked about before, is part of a very traditional old Scandinavian religious group similar to Amish. The women do not practice birth control, as a result a child arrives every year or so once they marry until they can’t have any more. Every child is considered a blessing. Families are large, 13 children is not unusual.
For these women, life is basically one big play date. They get together, visit, and their children happily run about. Last night I understood why these women are all pretty happy and content, their children are exceedingly well behaved, and how and why it works.
I was sharing this observation with a friend who is more of a math and science type. As he put it, what I was experiencing was called chaos theory — a complex system that organizes itself.
So on those days when your children are on our last nerve, try adding on a few more! It works shockingly well. Short of that, head for a park or somewhere there will be other children around, bring a book, and enjoy the peace and quiet for a change!
Let those who have ears hear.
(And for those tough parenting moments where you just need a good laugh, I highly recommend this blog, Underdaddy. You will be howling in laughter about the absurdity of having children in no time, guaranteed! Enjoy!)
You have just observed kiddy critical mass. Within a family, the women quickly realize that they can’t get everything done by themselves; they have to get the kids working. So you see chores being done at much earlier age, like sorting laundry at six and cooking at eight. You also have older kids basically acting as baby sitters for younger kids.
The real difficulty is for the kids to get enough “parent time”. But if the parents have delegated enough of the work out to the kids in the form of chores, it frees them up to have more interpersonal time with their spouses and each of the children.
(Coming from a family of five that was run like an army platoon.)
Very true eccentric! These families run a tight ship too, with that many kiddos one would have to! I never understood how they did it until getting to know my babysitter’s family and seeing it from the inside. This group rarely socializes outside of their own faith, so it’s been fascinating for me to see it up close. I will add a link to my post about her world…
Here we go: https://notesfromaredpillgirl.com/2014/11/12/inside-a-world-without-feminism/
It is nice that all the ages lined up. It sounds a whole lot like economy of scale working in your favor. You need to do more of this. 🙂
Indeed fuzzie! I didn’t put it in the post but my friend”s keys went “missing” so they all stayed the night -spontaneous sleepover! I wonder if the kids didnt plot that!
Redpillgirlnotes,
The oldest is ten in that bunch? That is quite a trick fora ten year old.
I am glad that all were happy about the sleepover.
Well when the keys didn’t magically appear this morning and their mom had to call a friend to come get her and take her to her apartment office to unlock her place so she could get the spares I kindof figure maybe they really were lost. I don’t think the kids would have let her go thru all that if they had them? I would sure hope not! I would have taken her to get the keys but we couldn’t all fit in one car and couldn’t leave the kids here alone. Her car’s remote key lock and such is on the keychain, I sure hope it turns up!
The more kids,the better applies only if those kids parents are different. But if all the 6 kids are mine, I’m sure i’ll be pulling my hair by now. Not that I’m not pulling them with 2 kids. 😒😓
It sounds legit and not a trick. I do hope the keys turn up.
Redpillgirlnotes,
Happt Fourth of July to all!
Yes!! This is why I love planning play groups with my mommy friends. It really does work out very nicely – sometimes there’s fighting (with boys usually), but they actually seem to work it out ok without much intervention. I love seeing the babies interact with each other, too, so cute…. It gives me hope though to see you write about the amish-like people and their kids. 🙂
“but we couldn’t all fit into one car…”
Yea this is tricky… there’s no way my husband wants a mini-van and I hate them too, but we’re kinda stuck with barely any other options when it comes to vehicles supporting big families. We know one sweet family that has 9 kids… he practically has to drive a bus-like van!