I have written about my children’s babysitter before, a very wise and sensible girl of a local religious sect with Scandinavian origins. It’s similar to Amish but with electricity and automobiles, but not music, television or pop culture.
It has been fascinating to get to know her and learn about her world because as an “outsider” to their rather closed off community I have had a rare chance to see inside a world untouched by feminism and modern life up close.
One thing that struck me about Samantha was that unlike most 16-year-old girls these days, she was embracing the seasons of a woman’s life as traditionally lived.
Girlhood: Largely carefree and as part of a large family there are always others to play games with. Without television and other media distraction, these girls play house, tag, build forts, and explore the great outdoors. Children do not expect to be entertained by their parents, but to make their own fun. Children are still raised to be seen and not heard, and are expected to honor their mother and father. Education is central, as girls are expected to master a basic education, along with helping mom at home with housekeeping, cooking, and tending to other siblings. Even as a young child, these girls are learning skills to help prepare them to be good wives and mothers.
Young woman: As she enters the teen years, education continues to be a focus, as these girls aim to complete their education in preparation to marry. My babysitter, for example, participated in a program where she attended community college her last two years of high school, earning her high school diploma and two year degree the same week! She then transferred to a local commuter college and completed her BA in early childhood education by age 20. Dating is not allowed during the teen years. These girls socialize at family gatherings and church functions. As they approach 18, they begin formal courtship in search of a husband, all well supervised and approved by both families first. The goal of courtship is to find a spouse, not to date for fun. Most girls marry by 18 or 19. My babysitter married at 19 and continued her education that first year while preparing for her next life season.
Marriage and motherhood: Birth control is not practiced by this group, and in fact the goal is to have a first child before the first wedding anniversary. From there these women will have another child every year or two throughout her reproductive years. Children are seen as a blessing, not a burden. Families of ten or more are not uncommon. Once mothers, these women do not work outside the home but often supplement the family income by babysitting, refurbishing and reselling antiques and home decor items, or managing the administrative tasks for her husband’s or family’s business. Otherwise life is one big play date, with these moms getting together with their kiddos to socialize after her house chores are done. Home and hearth are top priority, her own ambitions are secondary to her primary jobs as wife and mom.
Late adulthood: By age 40 or so, the childbearing years are complete and as children grow up there is more time for personal ambitions and many of these women will start some sort of work from home enterprise during these years. Still her focus is her growing brood and preparing them for marriage and adulthood but life is fun and she enjoys the company of her young teen and young adult children, who unlike most teens and young adults, honor and adore their mother.
Golden years: After her children are grown, a woman might devote her time to volunteering or supporting a charitable cause or church endeavor. Many spend time mentoring young women or new moms. Grandchildren start arriving and her home is always full of family and company. She and her husband have lived carefully and have built a solid financial foundation for themselves free of debt so life is good and relatively worry free. Surrounded by her brood and the life she has built, she now enjoys the fruits of her life well lived and is honored and revered by her community.
It’s certainly very different than the life path of a typical girl and woman in our modern world, but having seen it up close I truly question if we wouldn’t be better off as individuals and as a society by taking some lessons from this path less travelled. Rather than the oppressive gloom and doom I expected to see thanks to my own rather feminist indoctrinated upbringing, I have seen great happiness and contentment in the women within this community. They have a happiness and sense of purpose often lacking in today’s modern woman. Imagine that!
What season of life are you on as a woman? How does it compare the the path above? What do you find appealing, or not, about this concept of a woman’s life seasons?
Let those who have ears hear.
I’m in the early marriage and young children rearing years. I thankfully only spent a few years in the corporate office world. I’m so at peace being home. I am happier and healthier than I’ve ever been. I’m almost 28 but I look and feel better than I did at 20. This little life of mine is precious. I wish more women knew what they are missing out on. I look forward to the golden years, becoming wiser, having grandchildren and a loving husband. God’s ways are always better than our best plans.
Here lifestyle sounds to have a lot of parallels with the Mennonites here in the USA.
I typically date women in their Golden Years. They have a lot more freedom to strike out and choose a lifestyle, rather than have one imposed upon them by roles or responsibilities of an earlier age.
Words of gold, I am so happy to hear this! Indeed the Book lays out the path of a rich life, why so few follow I do not know. Wishing you a lifetime of blessings ahead!
Indeed eccentric, many women fear this life stage. So these women, they are single at that age?
Redpillgirlnotes,
Thanks for the chance to look in their window and see how life is for them. It’s workable.
I hope my son gets super blessed by acquiring a wife that wants to live life as you outline on this blog. In reality, I presume, there are still a few out there.
I’m thinking of the Twilight Zone episode where a man speaks into a recorder microphone, describing women. Then magically the women he describes appear.
Poseidon, I hope that for your son, too! I hope that for all of our kids. I hope everything old becomes new again as more and more women and men realize we traded something that mostly worked for something far inferior. That’s my hope!
@ Poseidon actually in the area where I live, there are many many such women. And with each generation, thanks to their childbearing philosophy, they are increasing six to ten fold! š Button-cute, blue eyed, long haired, blondes! However, one would need to attend their church to be welcomed as a potential court-er to these lassies. I should write a post about the men folk, they are held to equally high traditional male roles – stoic provider/protectors who work hard, live clean, and sit in the pew on Sundays. Patriarchs. Old school.
Redpillgirlnotes,
Just guessing but, I think that they are making just the right number of boys to take care of the girls. That they would have extra girls would be too much to hope for.
@ fuzzie yes I suppose that’s the case…. The boys are increasing six to ten fold, too. But actually this community could use some new blood. Because its so limited, and so many are cousins, they are starting to have genetic issues arise from the closed gene pool. Maybe they need some brave volunteers? š
Redpillgirlnotes,
Fromthe feedback here, thete seem to be plenty of boy volunteers. Where are the girl volunteers going to come from?
” Maybe they need some brave volunteers? :)”
Go for it fuzzie. You can act as the official manospheriatic husbandal ambassador. Conquer one of the lasses with a wedding ring and report back to us if others of our spherical persuasion should also partake.
Poseidon740,
While it is a happy thought, when it first came to me, it was on behalf of RPG’s brother aho had just moved cross country. He was due for a break. In this marketplace, few men will get one.
Mike gives le Monique two thumbs up. I guess it works pretty fast.
I’m only on the one spring, and the thing goes up to four springs.
Highly recommended.
-this is my final review on le Monique
(well, unless I get into circus acts or something, in which case I’ll need the social networking),
but I thought I’d keep you posted in case anyone wants to buy it and try it out.
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Seems odd that women understand these life seasons not.
“What are they thinking” one wonders
Mrs. Yoda,
They weren’t thinking of sandwiches. They weren’t even thinking of soup.
I loved reading about this woman’s community and the seasons of their lives – very encouraging, Bloom!
Mrs. Yoda… “what were they thinking?” What I found out from that first year of being married is that the way we’re raised now as women, produces selfish individuals but we don’t realize how selfish we are until we try to become a wife who’s supposed to care about her husband and his well-being. I was surprised and constantly convicted of how selfish I was during that first year, and when I’d tell my single girlfriends how marriage really shows you how selfish you are, they wouldn’t understand and would tell me that it’s ok to be selfish. Marriage advice kind of feeds into that kind of thinking that he should be pleasing meeee, making meeee feel comfortable, doing what IIIIII want.
“Iām thinking of the Twilight Zone episode where a man speaks into a recorder microphone, describing women. Then magically the women he describes appear.”
LOL I haven’t seen that, but the imagery is funny!
“Go for it fuzzie. You can act as the official manospheriatic husbandal ambassador. Conquer one of the lasses with a wedding ring and report back to us if others of our spherical persuasion should also partake.”
Yes, that’s exactly what I was thinking… cute blonde women with morals and values that get married young and embrace their life seasons???? This sounds like a unicorn farm… any single manospherian men should flock there!
Dragonfly,
Thanks for the good wishes. Thanks also for the honesty about being raised to be selfish. I can see that now and how it would negatively impact marriage.
We are all intrinsically selfish in accordance with our fallen sinful nature.
Liz, what is Le Monique? Or should I not inquire?
Lol it’s a medical device from France, poseidon.
Designed to exercise girl parts.
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Dragonfly, that’s good you realized about the selfishness, I too had been raised like that and was quite the pill when I was younger. It makes me cringe to think back on the way I acted. Yikes! Totally immature, shit tests galore! I wish I had known different…
Something I have observed in the ladies of this faith, I think that because the children are raised in the old ways rather than this new fangled “children are the center” way, the girls (and boys too) learn not to be self centered. That there are expectations. That you earn status and provlidges. I think it’s good.