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Notes From a Red Pill Girl

~ A site for women interested in a red pill perspective (where men are welcome too!)

Notes From a Red Pill Girl

Monthly Archives: April 2016

Red Pill Women?

29 Friday Apr 2016

Posted by redpillgirlnotes in Red Pill

≈ 75 Comments

Tags

battle of the sexes, blue pill, casual sex, commitment, courtship, dating, divorce, feminism, gender, love, marriage, red pill, relationships, romance

Now it’s been said that women have no place in the manosphere, nor can they comprehend or be red pill. I can see the point, and mostly agree. Manosphere sites are for men, and women should respect those male only spaces, just as we would expect men to respect women only spaces.

However I have myself learned tremendously from my exposure to the manosphere and the red pill, and so I am not so sure I would say women being exposed to these ideas is without merit. In fact, I know that for me personally it has entirely changed how I live my life and approach the world — for the better!

I was just as clueless, perhaps more, as anyone when I stumbled across the red pill. I was drinking the mainstream media kool aide and believed pretty much all of it. It had never even occurred to me that perhaps those facts might be skewed to support an unspoken agenda that was in turn destroying the relationships between men and woman, and destroying families.

I was horrified. But I could also see it was true. I wish more people understood how our “modern way” of thinking is leading us as a society right toward a cliff.

But there are no sites, or few, where women can be exposed to these ideas that could help improve gender relations and help get things back on track. In fact, that’s one of the main reasons I started this very site — to provide that place where women (and men) can learn about a different path. A path back toward men being men and women being women.

And in turn, then those women (and men) can raise the next generation without all this social experiment nonsense that was foisted upon my generation — the idea that gender is a social construct and that being the same is the answer. Men and women are not the same. They are uniquely suited to play a role, with strengths and weaknesses, and they are in my humble opinion two parts of a whole.

My advice to the women who come here and to the manosphere in general would be to listen, truly listen, to what these men are saying. Put yourself in their shoes. See the damage that has been done. Understand the anger, frustration, and pain. And then be and do different than the average women. Rather than argue with them, or defend yourself and claim, “I am not like that” realize that on some level, yes you are. But you have a choice. Become aware of where women fall, and guard yourself. Use it to become a better woman. Then, teach other women to be better women, too.

A Blue Pill Tale

22 Friday Apr 2016

Posted by redpillgirlnotes in Red Pill, Relationships

≈ 85 Comments

Tags

blue pill, break up, divorce, marriage, red pill, relationships

A friend of mine lives with her son, daughter in law, and their two kids aged 4 and the younger is 8 months, both boys. They have the average blue pill life going, and while they are frantically trying harder and harder to work the script, it’s just not working.

They both have better than average jobs. They live in a ritzy neighborhood in a brand new house they just built. They drive brand new cars, wear name brand everything, and from all outside appearances they are a success. Living the American dream.

Except it’s really a house of cards. The couple spends every penny they have and then some. They are fortunate to have my friend living there and taking care of the kids, the cooking, and the cleaning in exchange for room and board because if they did not have that, they would be thousands even more underwater a month than they are.

Despite this they are busy spending, spending, spending anyway. Planning a two week vacation to Hawaii. Buying a boat. Impressing their friends with their latest and greatest aquisitions.

But the cracks are beginning to show. He confessed to his mother that he hates his life, feels trapped, wants to run away to Hawaii and leave it all behind. He’s even hinted at suicidal thoughts, feeling he is in over his head and despite working 60 hours a week, just can’t get ahead.

His wife shows little interest in her children, leaving the majority of their care to her mother in law. She pops pain pills and laxatives and despite being rail thin worries that she’s fat. She’s constantly going to doctors, insisting something is wrong, but they can’t seem to figure it out. (I wonder if she tells them about the pills? That may be the problem…) She works in a medical office as an assistant, but she says she wants to do something else, from home, but she doesn’t know what or take any steps to make it happen.

Yesterday, a box arrives in the mail from Blue Apron. Despite the fact that my friend is a gourmet cook who makes everything from scratch, even putting entire meals together ready to just put in the oven and bake, the daughter-in-law decides what they really “need” to make life worth is this dinner in a box that all her friends are doing.

I suppose it’s convenient, it all comes packed together, just what you need, ready to assemble into a “home cooked” meal. But that convenience is expensive, about $40 a day and she’s signed up to get 6 dinners a week. The amount of packaging is another issue, there is an incredible amount of waste associated with keeping all the fresh ingredients cold and protected in transit. All that — trash.

I would predict this couple will soon crash head first into some serious financial problems, and their marriage likely will not survive. Another broken family, thanks to the blue pill. I hope not but all signs say they are hell bent on barreling down this path right toward their doom. Sad.

My friend advised her son, “Finish the landscaping around the house and then SELL IT. Get out from under all this mess and live a simpler life and be happy.”

I hope he listens….

 

Sickness or Health?

19 Tuesday Apr 2016

Posted by redpillgirlnotes in Red Pill

≈ 36 Comments

Tags

abundance, attraction, break up, break ups, casual sex, commitment, courtship, dating, divorce, gender, love, marriage, red pill, relationships, romance

I have this friend, who is also a therapist, who often says very profound stuff.

One day, he said this:

“When you are sick, you are drawn to the pain. When you are healthy, you are drawn to the love.”

Ommmmm.

Ponder. Share. Discuss.

The Validation of Coupledom

17 Sunday Apr 2016

Posted by redpillgirlnotes in Relationships

≈ 24 Comments

Tags

battle of the sexes, being single, break ups, casual sex, commitment, couples, courtship, dating, divorce, fatherhood, love, marriage, red pill, relationships, singledom

A few months ago I noticed a very interesting social dynamic I had never quite picked up on before: the validation of coupledom.

Now I have pondered this from a female point of view before, and there’s much discussion within the manosphere about how for many women, the social validation of being married might be a big motivator for a woman to marry for the wrong reasons (and I would agree, it can be.)

As a single female, I have felt the unease people feel around singles in certain social settings where a “plus 1” is expected. I can usually find a friend to accompany me to such events, to minimize the awkwardness. But there is something about being a single person after a certain age that makes people uneasy, for single men and women alike.

But what about single men versus coupled men? Is there any social benefit of being a in relationship for men?

I think there is, based on a random observation about a single biz associate and friend I know. First of all he is an INTJ (a Meter’s Briggs Personality Type) so he is not the most social butterfly of a person, and in fact his resting face is rather stoic, almost hostile, blank. I have heard other INTJ’s refer to it as the “INTJ death stare.”  I could see how people might perceive him as a brooding and perhaps dangerous character (he’s anything but, what it is, is he’s very intelligent and observant so he is always taking in and processing lots of info internally when in public, but at first glance I have seen people shy away from him, give him lots of extra room, not stand near him, even cross the street to avoid him!)

Then I noticed when we are together in a social setting people will often assume we are a couple, and him being in the company of a woman somehow “softens” his image or the perception that he is a threat. They often will address me vs. him, but people are more at ease for lack of a better way to put that.

Then I was really amazed when he and I and my two kids were out and about in public to see what a difference that made in how strangers seemed to perceive him. My girls get along well with this guy and follow him like little ducks, so it didn’t surprise me when a woman working at a supermarket spoke to him as if he was their father, and we didn’t feel the need to correct her because after all it was a natural mistake and nothing to make a big awkward scene over with someone we’d never see again. But she treated him wholly differently than I had ever observed with him before — he was seen in the light of being a “family man” and it was like that somehow undid all of the apprehension or awkwardness or whatever people feel about this same person when he is alone in public and the gal was very friendly to him.

I don’t know what to make of it from a red pill or philosophical perspective, but I do think after seeing this that there is a “social proof” benefit to men for being part of a couple or part of a family in particular that single men may not have.

Not that it is a reason to be in a relationship only for this social salve, but it made me wonder if society extends perks to the “family man” that they do not to single men?

For example, I have heard male friends say promotions at work often go to men with families. Or that men with families get extra concessions that single men do not. I have also heard that men with what other men consider good wives and good families get social rank and are favored in the job market as well (Like Liz, she and their children reflect well upon her husband as a leader, because he is leading a successful family, people notice they “have it” and Mike benefits both professionally and socially for it).

Of course the other side of this is its unfair men who are single are possibly perceived differently and don’t have the same opportunities and advantages “family men” have.

Anyway this is kind of a half-baked post, I am just toying with the idea — is there a validation of coupledom effect, or not? Share examples where you have seen it to be so or not, and let me know what you think in the comments!

The Power of Your Thoughts

13 Wednesday Apr 2016

Posted by redpillgirlnotes in Red Pill

≈ 101 Comments

Tags

abundance, attraction, bad boys, battle of the sexes, blue pill, break up, break ups, commitment, courtship, dating, divorce, love, marriage, red pill, relationships, romance

I am not sure if this is a red pill topic exactly, but I wanted to share something I believe in strongly — how thoughts and beliefs can powerfully shape your life and experiences — for better or worse.

For example, relationships. I’ve been a reading a book recently called, “Is He Worth It?” The book is about how to spot the men who are worth dating/marrying versus the men who are not. Something the author focuses on heavily in the first part of the book is examining how one’s thoughts are leading them toward the type of relationship they desire, or not.

For example, if a woman believes men can’t be trusted, that point of view will color her interactions with men leading her toward, not away from, men who will “prove” her point of view correct. She will attract untrustworthy men!

I have seen the same effect in my business and work. My thoughts and beliefs shape my behavior. If I think or believe things are not going to go well or work out, they don’t. If I think and believe things will work out, often despite some pretty impossible odds, sure enough they somehow do!

Many times I have literally visualized something into reality by wanting it so badly and focusing so much of my time and energy toward making the desired outcome materialize. People ask me all the time how I have accomplished and built what I have done, and it really is just this simple — I had my mind set on a goal and come hell or high water I just kept going toward it until it finally happened! I actually have several irons in the fire at the moment that are in just this category!

It’s a simple concept but one worth pondering. How are your thoughts and beliefs shaping your world? Are they getting you closer to the life you want, or not? Are they holding you back or pushing you forward? Are they mostly negative or mostly positive?

As they say, “Change your thoughts, change your life.” And I have seen it in my own life far to many times to believe it is a coincidence. Never underestimate the power of your thoughts.

What do you think? Please share in the comments!

Yes, I am Still Here!

02 Saturday Apr 2016

Posted by redpillgirlnotes in Red Pill

≈ 344 Comments

Tags

attraction, bad boys, battle of the sexes, blue pill, break up, break ups, casual sex, commitment, courtship, dating, divorce, feminism, gender, love, marriage, red pill, relationships, romance, sex

Sorry, I have been busy with real life endeavors as of late and have not had much chance to write, or even comment! But rest assured, I am still here and all is well!

I have an idea stewing in my head but it’s not quite complete, so perhaps for now perhaps you guys can share some ideas for topics you’d like to see me tackle and discuss them among yourselves?  I’m all ears…

Have a GREAT weekend!

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