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casual sex, commitment, divorce, family, love, marriage, red pill, relationships, riding the carousel, sex
There’s a common saying in the Red Pill world that a girl who embraces the choice to live it up in her 20’s and early 30’s, choosing casual sex and “experiences” over settling down is “riding the carousel.”
Riding the carousel cashes in on the upper hand a woman has in youth. And it’s all fun and games until the reality hits — when she’s “ready” to settle down, things have changed, and not in her favor.
This woman’s essay captures a real life carousel tale, although she herself probably has never heard the term:
(Note the part of her story when she did have a great guy who wanted to marry her, and instead of appreciating his love she cheated on him with every bad-boy she could find. Poor guy!)
And here are some images to illustrate, at what point do you think she was at her highest MMV (marriage market value)?
She did eventually marry, at age 47. And I hope they are happy, and she’s good to him, and that her life experiences have not jaded her so much that she cannot truly bond or love. And I hope she advises the younger women in her life not to take their youth for granted, and that nothing lasts forever…
Notes From a Red Pill Girl 
Alcohol, drugs and lack of sleep hard on a person it is
Is that wha Alicia Silverstone looks like now?
Shudders…
Don’t get me wrong, I am not meaning to be mean or pick on this gal. I think her story is an example of the outcome of the tale young women aren’t told… Until they discover for themselves. This gal in particular seemed to be self destructive, and struggled w depression. Perhaps bc of trying to live a life script that she was sold as “better” but really was an unproven and experimental one.
Young girls and women today are told they can have it all, on demand, w no downsides or consequences. It’s just not true. That’s what I am trying to illustrate here… The side of the story this woman and many others aren’t told…
I do hope that she treats her husband like gold. As for the dramatic before and after pictures, are they even the same person? That is an incredible difference and it’s not all about having sex with strangers. She had to do some serious candle burning at bothe end to end up like that.
In my early 20s I interviewed a woman nearing her 60s who had written a book aimed at young women trying to get them to see how glorious youth is, how much like a perfect flower in bud or a ripe juicy peach a gal is in youth. Sadly most (myself included at that age) are self concious, pick themselves apart. Only later, she said, do they realize how silly all that was, how one day she may envy even marginally attractive young women… And see what they themselves cannot.
Genetics and lifestyle combine to determine how well or poorly a woman will age, or as they say in the red pill world, hit the wall. Perhaps this gal both lived fast and did not have the facial structure or genetics to age well. Sometimes women not so attractive in youth end up more attractive in the end than ones who were beauties in their youth, as many a high school reunion can illustrate…
It’s just nature cleansing the gene pool from people who got it wrong. She had her fun, she closed her genetic line, and in aprox. 30 years she’ll fade forever. Me, sometimes I envy these butterflies. I spend my 20s on raising kids and building career. Smart move that brought me to the top – and made depressed and disinterested in life. You can’t have it all, do you?
Well, at least she have a partner now and wouldn’t spend her later years alone. Though given that he’s either that non-judgemental, that short of options or knows little about her past makes me doubt the future of their marriage.
“Sadly most (myself included at that age) are self concious, pick themselves apart. Only later, she said, do they realize how silly all that was”…reminds me of a great SF story by Connie Willis, ‘Chance,’ in which a very troubled woman moves back to the town where she went to school…and encounters her former self:
http://chicagoboyz.net/archives/16168.html
Some of them do see the wall coming fast towards them, while also seeing that their ex isn’t having the same problem. That’s when they start wanting him back.
I remember VIVIDLY the older people who told me to enjoy my youth, enjoy being pretty, how they themselves never saw it until they got old. Also one man who told his daughter basically every teenage girl who is not misformed or terribly overweight looks beautiful.
Thankfully, I took their advice to heart. I met my husband young and never slept around, but I did bask in the joy of knowing just looking my way would make someones day. It was fun!
Little oops thing – when I was single, I used to smile flirtily at men who would pass me while I waited for my bus, thought I’d give them a boost and their bus would take them away anyway, no harm done. Stopped doing that after one guy got out at the next busstop and ran all the way back to talk to me. Not such innocent fun as I’d imagined…
(That’s as bad girl as I got)
HHW,
That is a good story. Would that all the grls were that careful/
the before and after pics could be totally staged … if the same makeup and hair were done in the ”after” pic as the before … with the same pose and attitude, it would look good, too.
– – –
“Sadly most (myself included at that age) are self concious, pick themselves apart. Only later, she said, do they realize how silly all that was, how one day she may envy even marginally attractive young women… And see what they themselves cannot.”
yep.
Ame, I searched by year to find the pics but yes…the 2nd is not the best lighting etc.
HHW I am glad someone told you, and even more so that you listened…
Yes it is sad but imagine hitting the wall with ugly virgin.
As a ulgy virgin lol thank BOb
Thank Bianca For wine sorry my phone suck
“Sometimes women not so attractive in youth end up more attractive in the end than ones who were beauties in their youth, as many a high school reunion can illustrate…”
Yeah, Sometimes as in it is really fucking rare. As for the lady in question’s MMV, she never had it. That woman is damaged goods in both pics. I wouldn’t be surprised if she ends up in a news story of her stabbing her current hubby to death at some point. The vibe I get from her is that she is an evil man hating cunt the likes of Anita Sarkeesian.
More pointed Synonyms for “Carousel Rider” include: Rocket Queen & Turbo Slut.
Just sayin’. Oh and while Carousel Rider may be one of those handy polite euphemisms for those church ladies you hang out with, RPG, the correct term to use around us cool kids is “Cock-Carousel Rider”.
Didn’t follow the link elle to check it out, didn’t need too … know the story well enough. I call it “Down the rabbit hole” … all you got to do is go to POF.com and look at enough women’s profiles to see it in action. Look at late 30s to late 40s … and you’ll see. The BEFORE … early 30s usually … still skinny and attractive. Then they divorce rape their man and steal his kids AND make him pay for kids he can’t even see. They get bitter and angry and hateful. I’ve thought about this and I seriously think that constantly trying to brainwash a man’s kids to HATE their father is what takes a toll. And they gain a few pounds in each pic. So, next pic -> REALITY HITS HOME … they wish they woulda stayed married pic. And the next pic … REALLY shitty attitude, gained a few more pounds and a tat or two and maybe a piercing. As they realize that the EX coming back ain’t happening … and her EX … HATES HER FUCKING GUTS for turning his kids against him. Next pic … more tats, 25 more lbs, looks like shit … hit the wall and looking for a bad boy who rides a Harley.
I am not exaggerating … in a slide of 3-5 pics a woman has gone from a cute, girl next door, MILF ….. to a broke, drugged out, tatted out, whore who aspires to riding a Harley with ANY man who will take her as long as he’s a TALL BAD BOY … seriously these chicks look like she’s aged 25 yrs … in the span of 5.
I am not exaggerating … I’ve seen it over and over and over again. I can already see i coming from the pics in the profile, already know … yep, here’s another one … down the rabbit hole …
GLA I would agree, even in her youth she did not have the mindset to be a successful wife. I tried to find a true “before” pic but wasn’t able to find any where she didn’t already look like she was…trouble. As for her marriage, I was afraid to search to see if they are already divorced. I would agree w you, the odds are against it….
May I suggest beer goggles?
GLA, lol, yes I did leave that cock part out.
As for hanging out w church ladies, I do that but also have friends from all walks of life. I would not consider myself shelterd by any means, I can read Heartiste w/o being in the least offended for example, not that it’s a good thing necessarily but I have lived enough or watched others live enough that as soon as I stumbled across the red pill, I recognized the truths there… I wish more women did, which is why I started this blog. So yes, I try to take the edge off the way a guy might put it, so the message isn’t lost bc of the delivery…if that makes sense. Red pill concepts translated into girl speak.
Agreed mega, it’s not a pretty path…. or a wise one. I try to help women see how this path is not in their own best interest (much less men’s) bc solopisim…. one has to appeal to how it affects HER life negatively and in a way no woman who is thinking would want, for things to stick.
@Renee, ideally a woman is off the market so to speak long before the wall hits. Better to be a virgin than to be a slut, imho. At any age. It damages the soul. I have seen friends do the “empowered sex life” thing and it was not good for them, emotionally. WOmen can’t fu(k like a guy, even if they think they can, they get hurt when the “no strings” thing doesn’t become more…. until they get to the point that they don’t feel that anymore, and then it is really not good for them emotionally.
Oh I understand
I can’t feel sympathy for her. She got to where she is through choices.
Yes it is sad but imagine hitting the wall with ugly virgin.
Kinda like what vast numbers of modern men experience it is
Ladies.
Its about CHOICES!!
oh maybe 1970s to 2000 you didn’t know better.
You believed the pretty lies.
BUT
a 25 year old in 2016 was born in 1990 and was a 10 year old in 2000.
She SAW, as in personal experience, her mother and the effect of her choices!!!
And her friends mothers!! Her Aunts!! Beniffer Bradgelina Konyadashian!!
Our 25 year old SAW it. Unless she grew up in a convent in which case there is hope.
BUT the rest of you …I Call BULLSHIT!!
You KNOW this stuff.
You KNOW what happens.
You just don’t WANT IT TO HAPPEN TO YOU.
So you Go Gurl, Ostritch in the sand, party like its 1999.
And purposely, conciously, CHOOSE to ignore reality.
Until its too late
Then its …fill in the scapegoat concept here.
At least Bloom has the BALLS to call it as it is
and CALLOUT her sisters…for their own good.
So you can keep playing innocent I didn’t know all you want
But we Men KNOW you know.
Either that or you are too STUPID to be worth our time.
At least if you owned it. Yup my 30s onwards are fucked and I will never get married but god the last ten years were fun. Hell we can respect that. We do stupid shit all the time. That scar? yup bungie jumped without the bungie, my bad.
You playing victim or ignoring it and thinking we believe you? Worse than makes you look dumb but lets US know you think WE are dumb enough to believe it too.
Please. Its insulting to us.
So make a choice.
Accept the short term fun
Accept the long term consequences
And Woman UP!!
It is no different that our recent choices to ride the No Work Carousel
Yup. Got a trade. Yup got a tiny apartment. Yes I am never going to be Mr. Suit.
Corner office?? Would you hire me?? Please. Gonna be unmarried and alone at 40. absolutely……But I CHOOSE it rather than be a good married plowhorse!!
BUT WE OWN IT. thats why its Men GOING Their Own Way…MGTOW
Not MWTOW…Men Whining Their Own Way.
So stop with the sob story, carousel wall obstacle course of deflection.
Its a well informed, know consequences, lifestyle Choice.
(Those raised in convents excepted…..the three of you can stand over there and have your pick of every guy on the planet.)
But what do I know. Im just a guy married in the 80s with who will be sitting beside his wife of 29 years as his daughter marries a nuclear engineer at 21 next spring.
Not apologizing for the tone.
But I am not a woman hater. I love looking at them. I love the concept of them
I just hate to see all that potential wasted when I know it doesnt have to be.
My daughter is proof.
But all this navel gazing discussion of causes and whys.
Waste of air and time.
I just had to call out the hypocracy.
Bloom. Keep fighting the fight but really…
they all KNOW.
After reading Renee Harris, I am reminded that third wave feminism sold women a bill of goods. All this sex poaitivity is not positive for women. They are wired that way and most men aren’t either. I don’t think that women who bought into this may be able to recover.
Ahhh!! Fuzz. Dude. Please tell me you cross posted.
My generation sold a bill of goods …. maybe.
But this generation…..They KNOW. They CHOOSE.
Horseman,
I have to agree. They have seen the results and they can’t claim ignorance.
True, horseman. I tend to see it go one of two ways w young women today. They either marry relatively young or they embrace hookup culture.
Admittedly both paths have their own challenges, but when you fast forward a few decades one (done properly) is the far more stable, secure, and healthy path. Surrounded by a family who loves her or alone w multiple heartbreaks and increasingly unhappy. Of course there are exceptions to this but exceptions don’t prove the rule…
Horseman, agreed young women today have ample evidence of what really works and what is a house built on sand, but I think many are still fed the untruth that “nobody cares about all that anymore.”
And thanks to this “go gurrrl, nobody will judge or care” untruth they are fed, plus the junk culture, many young girls today start being sexually active before they can even really understand any of this. By 18, they’ve already had multiple partners and hookups… And are well on their way unfortunately.
A gal I work with, her 14 year old daughter, for example, has had two partners (that she will admit to) already 😦
RPG,
I think that early sexual activity goes hand in hand with postponing marriage. That is why the fourteen year old with a history is not that shocking. If she admits to a partner count of two, it is probably more, just like her grown up colleagues. Hookup culture is insidious.
@ fuzzie, so true. Sad, really. 😦
@ horseman I appreciate the kudos btw. I wish someone had told me all this when I was young. It’s what I plan to tell my girls. “Modernism” is a big fail. The old ways may not have been perfect but they were the way bc it’s ultimately what works for the best of all involved.
But women aren’t paying attention to what they don’t want to see. They see the 10-20% where it works out. Not the 8o% + where it doesn’t. And if they do see the failures, they believe that it happened because that chick lacked her girl power.
I must disagree with Horseman. With the influence of pop culture and trainwreck mothers, it’s much easier to believe the women. Just a few weeks ago a woman with kids from 4 different men confidently told me I will learn to make my own decisions, and made it seem she felt sorry for me. She kicked all the men out because they were too involved and she resents her oldest son for turning into his dad, trying to be a leader.
She came across so self-assured, as her daughter, I cannot imagine I would do anything but listen to her advice. I’ve had other people in the playground tell my boys they should always listen to girls and women!
They hear this stuff, and the denigrating tone with which people speak of virginity, they want to be accepted and respected by society. Pop culture and trainwreck moms make it seem like trainwreck lifestyle is the way to gain approval.
I would have been that trainwreck, if I wasn’t raised the way I was. 100% sure. Like all young girls, I wanted to make my family proud, to be mature for my age, etc.
Happyhousewifey
I respect your opinion but must disagree.
Her kids SAW every day 365 days a year the living conditions of a mother with kids by 4 different guys. Hey Sis hows your dad, hey Bro hows yours, junior do you even know yours??
They lived thru the sobbing of their mother every time Daddy buggered off!! They heard the yelling matches. They rolled their eyes as Mom got dressed up for yet another date.
You can’t unlearn that.
Absolutely pop culture and social messaging influence WHAT THEY WANT
But it does not remove from their heads WHAT THEY KNOW.
So it comes down to choices and consequences.
The Question For Society
Are we going to continue to excuse women as a group, yes some were too young, exceptions, but as a group, are we going to allow them to disengage thier choices from the known consequences of their actions because of their beliefs and wants?
A.K.A. FEELINGS ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN REALITY
If yes then enjoy the decline.
If no then cut the gladhanding, accept reality, and GET ON WITH IT.
Thats what men are doing in the absence of a decision. We do not want this state of affairs, we dont want these child women, we dont want to run on feelings (manginas). We saw reality, assessed what it did to our wants and adapted accordingly.
Unfortunatey the only logical adaltation is the MGTOW minimalist lifestyle.
Its a Choice but only as the lesser of many bad evils.
Horseman said,
Its a Choice but only as the lesser of many bad evils.
I think evil is the wrong word, and I think under current conditions MGTOW is a great choice. It is just about becoming a man.
Society has always had a ‘right of passage’ for boys to become men. Most recently that ‘right of passage’ was probably ‘getting married and starting a family’. Well society has now rejected that.
In current society boys are taught to worship a woman and make all her want and wishes come true. This is the right of passage that is pushed, but this does not allow boys to really become men. They just become well trained animals. The only other thing a boy can do to become a man is to ‘define for himself what it means to be a man/MGTOW’.
I think this fits well with what men were historically. Once a boy passed the ‘right of passage’, most any courses he took in life was deemed fine because he was a man.
Ya know, some of us guys also get hurt when the “no strings thing” doesn’t become more.
You only feel that way, because she doesn’t have little round ears on top!
Nothing like putting yourself before your kids.
Mgtowhorseman, thank you, but I still do not agree.
Shouting matches when daddy is present, then peace when he is gone… And constantly hearing it’s daddys fault. Between welfare here (very generous) and alimony and mom not working, they go to amusement parks and movies and pools and have every toy they could want and attention from mommy. Other families will often sympathize with the ‘poor’ single mom and try to encourage her with kind words, confirming to the kids what mom said. They do not see how nice it is when daddy is home, because most functional families have the men present only on evenings (when kids sleep) or weekends (when kids spend time with their family, not with their playmates).
The women I have met who grew up in broken homes, all point fingers at men. They go the way their mothers went and worse. They genuinely think the happily married ones are weak doormats, too afraid to express themselves, but full of the same anger.
Based on that, I guess we will have to agree to disagree, or have I convinced you? 🙂
(That still leaves the matter of how society can be fixed on a larger scale of course, raising our family well is as much as I can muster, so I will leave that to you)
“I try to take the edge off the way a guy might put it, so the message isn’t lost bc of the delivery…”
This and the fact you’re not selling anything is what I love about this blog. I flinch a little every time I read something in crude harsh words, or when I see an eye-watering advertisement.
FNU,
That’ll work.
Happyhousewifey,
Four kids with four different fathers? You may be looking at someone who’s rationalization hamster is supercharged. HBorseman is right. They know. It’s just that they can’t admit it. Her kids have to know and have no desire to go down that road.
HHW
The outcome … what they DO you are absolutely right. They are their mothers and worse. That is reality. You are bang on.
But the excuses… oh they don’t know better, the “its not their fault because of_________” That is what I disagree with. Society is giving them a pass on the responsibility for their choices. We are enabling.
Oh poor x drinks because of blah and blah and blah. Still doesn’t stop the sclorosis or inability to fend for themselves. Just put down the bloody bottle. An addict cannot get help until they admit, not to themselves but to those who can help them, that they have a problem. Enablers reinforce their delussions and keep them soused.
We are giving the addict the bottle and saying drink up yet expecting them to become polite social drinkers. No.
Drop the bad boy. Step away from the OK stupid profile. Lose the leopard print.
Admit your problem and enroll in rehab or at least teach the kids to learn from your mistakes.
Until then HHWs observations are right. It will continue. Unless we address the underlying issue of lack of agency.
At least more men going MGTOW will be like removing the booze from the corner stores
Ah, NO!!!
30 years as a LEO and you know the one common thread to repeated domestic violence calls at the same location and with different men?
THE SAME WOMAN!
What do these five things have in common:
1) a 15y/o that gives birth at 15, who gets in to a fight with her baby daddy at 22, and has him put in jail for DV.
2) a woman who filed bankruptcy at 20.
3) a woman who marries at 25, a baby at 27, and causes a divorce when the baby is only 2.
4) a woman who files for bankruptcy at 30.
5) a woman who gets in to an argument with the boyfriend she had just moved in with along with her 2 boys, and has him arrested for DV, and he loses his job as a cop and goes to jail for almost 3 years.
? ? ?
THE SAME WOMAN !!!
I’ve sat in the courtroom too much and seen too often where a situation only escalated because of how the woman actively tried to get the man to do something to wrong.
And this isn’t just me saying it. The Judges have said so to me when we were back in chambers.
When all the cops, prosecutors, and judges know a woman by her ‘crazy name’, it ain’t the guy.
And there ain’t no peace when he’s gone. She’s still doing the yelling, but it’s at the TV, or at the kids because she thinks that they took her last blunt!
FML I have seen women do what you describe. They just keep going and going and going… And won’t stop until he snaps.
I have also seen the opposite where a super submissive woman gets hit, no provocation (except maybe him drinking and he’s a mean drunk).
But I would for sure agree, sometimes (often?) it is the woman and that’s a side of the DV story that never gets told…
In my area the judges seem to be hip to this. A former neighbor of mine, vixen, once posted all these pics on FB of her all bruised up. Her boyfriend showed up at the bar and she was with another “guy friend.” She said the bf and his roommate attacked them. DV charges were filed all around but in the end only she was charged! Why? The videotape clearly showed she was the perp!
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I bought this woman’s book in the 90’s and was immediately disgusted with the author’s self centered selfishness and disconnect from everything that didn’t put her at the center of the world. One sentence in to the Elle article and my twenty-year long opinion was immediately reconfirmed!