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If you haven’t heard the term “apex fallacy” before, it means the misbelief that the experiences of those at the top are, could, or should be the experiences of all.

For example, women have been told things like:

All men play the field, so it’s only fair for women to play the field just like men do. Except the reality is it is really only the very most attractive or wealthy or high status men who can easily play the field with as many women as they like. Most guys, even guys who are self proclaimed pick up experts, actually have to work very hard and get rejected many many times before they succeed. So women who are “playing the field just like a guy does” actually don’t realize that finding a guy willing to have sex with an average woman is not nearly as difficult as finding a woman who is willing to have sex with an average guy.

Another example is in career expectations. Many women have been led to believe all men have exciting, fulfilling, top level, upper management, high level, well paid, white collar, CEO type jobs and so women should expect to have the same. But again this is apex fallacy at play. In fact few men have jobs in that category. Most men work average, not very exciting, not very empowering, not very fulfilling jobs. All men do NOT have top level jobs and yet women have been mislead to believe that all women deserve top level jobs or it’s “not equal.”

Or consider the claim that, “men can do whatever they want.” In reality very few men can do whatever they want. Such men would need to have the power, wealth, status, connections, etc. to get away with doing so. Most men do not have these things and are restricted by the limitations of life like most people.

Once one starts looking for apex fallacy, the examples can be found all over the place. So while girls may be told “you can have it all” the reality is very few people have it all. Such apex fallacy sets women up for a lifetime of feeling cheated and oppressed, underappreciated and underpaid, held back and victimized when in reality they are doing as well, or even better, than the average man.

Apex fallacy. Don’t buy it!

Can you think of some more examples of apex fallacy? Please share in the comments.