A gal I met recently through work (not the gal I have written about before considering frivorce) called to tell me she is getting divorced.
This took me by surprise because as far as I could see, they were a happy family. They have a son (8) and a daughter (6) who I had always assumed were both theirs, but she just revealed the son is from his previous marriage. (Note the odd timing, was he still married when they met?)
She had shown me the photos from their beautiful wedding just a few years ago. They have been together since before the daughter was born, but only married 2-3 years ago.
As she went on about how it was all him, how he was a narcissist, how he has been physically violent, how she had to file a restraining order, how he is having an affair, how he was upset because she is still in the home with all of his belongings, how he is keeping her from seeing the son, and on and on… I couldn’t help but wonder if she herself wasn’t the narcissist leaving a scorched earth behind her as she blew up her marriage?
I can’t say why exactly this thought crossed my mind. Perhaps it was how the whole tale centered around her as the victim, or how it was 100% all his fault, or how she didn’t once mention how the kids were doing, or seem concerned about how all this was affecting them, or how she was seemingly trying to “build her case” as the blameless and helpless victim, or exactly what it was.
Just on a hunch I checked her Facebook. She has already wiped it clean of all photos of the wedding, her ex, the son, etc. All that remained were photos of her or her and the daughter, appearing as if they had been just the two of them all along. Gone were many many photos that I know were there not too long ago because she had shown me. In fact, her prior Facebook was a carefully created picture of family bliss. Not a hint of anything wrong in Denmark. And now, less than a week after the split, it has been scrubbed of any mention of a recent marriage or divorce.
In the past I would have automatically believed her tale, but after hearing such tales from the other side around the manosphere, I now take things with a grain of salt.
Maybe it is as she said. I am not denying such things happen.
But, and this is just a hunch, she’s recently started working with a very successful and very single man whose business is taking off. Could this perhaps be the real motive behind the split? Sadly, it would not surprise me. I am sure all will come out in time. It always does.