True story: I am an IUD oops baby, luckily born just shortly before abortion was legalized. Yep, I am a one percent-er!
My mom had the IUD installed after the birth of my brother, who was 9-months-old when I was conceived. Had abortion been available, I am pretty sure she would have chosen to have one because she has said many times she wanted at least a two-year spacing between kids.
Luckily for me, she could not make that choice, so she went ahead and here I am! (Then to be sure it didn’t happen again, she got her tubes tied when I was born. Lol!)
I am sure it was a hardship to be unexpectedly pregnant again while chasing after a very active 9-month-old who was just walking. And as my mom puts it, he never really walked, he ran!
Tragically, two years after I was born, my father died in a car accident and my mom was a 27-year-old widow with two kids under the age of 5. I can’t even imagine how trying those times must have been for her. It wasn’t easy for any of us.
My mom has said many times were it not for myself and my brother forcing her to carry on simply because we needed the daily care, she isn’t sure she would have made it through those years. And she was glad that she had my bother and me, small parts of my dad living on. She could see him in us, in behaviors or physical traits, and it comforted her.
My mom says now she couldn’t imagine her life without me, or without her two granddaughters. And of course, I can’t imagine life without me or my kids, either! Had my mom had the right to choose, these very words you are reading probably never would have been written, my story never told!
Sometimes things happen. Those things may not be planned or ideal. But life has taught me that it’s best to roll with it, because none of us knows what lies ahead, and life has also shown me that if you just take things one day at a time, it works out, no matter how impossible it may seem at the time.
I am glad I beat the 99 percent odds against my ever having been, and I am happy to still be alive today to tell the tale!
Let those who have ears hear.
IUD´s today are way more secure. (Gynefix) In combination with NFP and condomes one should be able to lower the risk even further. But accidents will happen. Thats why I hope abortion will always be viable for those who need it.
I wonder how long after the birth of your sibling the IUD was installed. The first year is the highest risk. Add the whacky but massive bleeding after childbirth and voila, IUD is gone.
@emscherweib I get what you are saying, but I think like in my case it may have been seen as a choice of “convenience” rather than a true need.
I know women who have had children and given them for adoption, I know women who have adopted children and who cherish them, I know a woman who put of cancer treatment during her first pregnancy, had the baby, got treatment, and is alive and well today. (She could not have more kids after treatment.) I even know a woman who was pregnant with a child who she knew would not survive past birth that she carried to term so she could, as she put it, “Give him 9 months of life, at least.” I think all of these are loving choices.
I used to be pro-choice, but the older I get the less I support it in the majority of cases. But that’s just my opinion, I don’t mean to push it on anyone else.
I am not sure how long after. The IUD was removed when I was born bc they could not remove it during.
My mom says I came out with it triumphantly in my little fist, but I think she’s exaggerating there! Lol.
Abortions are cruel, but effective way to bail out the society from paying for stupid choices some women make. Think about the type of women that chose to abort – what type of mothers they’d be? They can’t pick the right man, they can’t control their carnal impulses, maintain the pill schedule or insist on using condoms. They’ll breed paupers, who will end up either in jails, or on the dole.
Abortions (ideally, eventually followed by a mandatory sterilization) are a must in any welfare state. It’s pure economics.
@ Sergey, thanks for sharing that, I can see your point! I wish if gals did NOT want a baby they would do their best to prevent getting pregnant at all. I wonder if women would make better choices, as well? Like don’t have unprotected sex unless you are willing to have a kid?
Then, if you still have an “oops” well, look at me! 😀 I think I have added to the world! Was meant to be! Just go with it! Trust me! 1% ers rule!
Also, GUYS who do not want a baby (regardless of what she “says” she’s taking or doing for bc) should take Rollo’s advice, always wear a condom and knot the end and take it with you! Why? You’ll have no say in the matter if she does get preggo. a spermicide gel for her in addition is added protection, together they have a failure rate of 5%. (5 in 100 odds)
As an aside, you guys really should lobby for some better options, there has to be a 99% sure way for a guy, too? If I were a guy, I think I would be super paranoid!
@RPG
Of course you added to the world! And I believe you’re wrong saying that your mother would’ve chose to abort you if she’d been presented with a possibility. Was she that kind of woman?
That’s my point: it’s the type of women, who’d go for easy way out of nasty situation they created themselves that needs abortion service the most. Think about it as of a damage control mechanism.
I’d rather wish nobody would ever think about having an abortion. But people are stupid. They make stupid choices, they act on a whim – and they are not going to accept the consequences ever. When men do stupid choices, they end up in jail. When women do stupid choices, they end up pregnant with no father around. If you ban the service – you’ll end up with a tsunamy of shitty single mothers neglecting their kids and a smaller wave of criminal abortions. That’d be devastating for society, so the service should be there. But we absolutely must strive to reduce the numbers!
For me, the most effective way to do it is through dismissive shame. Now, shaming on basis of ethics is not going to work. It’s just being dismissed as religious bigotry that have no place in XXI century. So I think we should use agree & amplify with RadFems: sure, you can have the abortion, and we’ll gladly pay for it! Because, you, see, it’s ECONOMICAL, it’s good for us to limit the damage you are about to deliver to the society. Because, dear, with all honesty, you will make a poor mother. Because you are a good-for-nothing at the moment, and the mere fact that you put yourself into the situation where you consider the abortion as a solution proves it. So – here, you can have it, free of charge, made on the tax-payer dime (because you don’t have any money, obviously, given who you are, are you darling?)! All done? Now go and enjoy the rest of your crappy life.
Sergey, how do I say this… my mom was married, to her high school sweetheart, but yes she was the type who would have been “logical” and went w what was convenient for her (to not be pregnant or have another kid so quick.) Like getting a tooth pulled, for some it is. Believe it or not.
@RPG
Well, in that case we’d have someone else, very similar to you, but 15 months younger by now. But I doubt it – you mother was not against having more kids after all.
In conversations I had with women, who went through abortions (unfortunately, too many – Russia is a world leader on number of abortions, with almost every second pregnancy ending up in a legal abortion – mostly due to it being first allowed almost a hundred years ago) I heard that all of them were really uncomfortable about the procedure, with some having lasting nightmares after. Maybe it’s different now, but it was NOT the same as regular dentist visit, not the decade ago at least.
@ Sergey who knows! Glad it did not happen!
Was birth control commonly available in Russia at that time?
@RPG
No, it was not until very late 80s – early 90s.
Also I’m sure my mom would have had another child if she had not had me but I also believe that it would’ve been a completely different person and that there would’ve never been “me” there was only one “me” there and will only ever be one “me!” 🙂
Of course nobody would’ve ever known what they were missing had they never met “me” but they still would’ve missed the unique creation, or one could also look at it as the random genetic scramble, that is known as me!
http://mgtowpanic.com/mgtow-life/313-the-generation-of-women-who-will-age-alone.html
Off topic but just found this.
One of the most thoughtful and non “ranting” mgtow sites I have seen.
This article outlines the actual day to day reality of what is coming for these women.
Writing reminds me of Ian Ironwood before he vanished.
“She realizes that many of the men who did try to get to know her genuinely and who she so ruthlessly annihilated; could have been a perfect man for her. And now she is still alone, and will stay alone, she had a wonderful opportunity and she blew it big time!
She powers down her laptop, messages a few single girlfriends, opens a bottle of wine, and sits in silence at her kitchen table, not knowing how any of this could have happened, as she asks herself “what’s wrong with me”, “why doesn’t anyone want me”. Her tears flow again, she knows she has no hope left, she will be alone for the rest of her life, that this very night is doomed to be repeated forever until the last breath she takes.
Her choices now and forever have little more than to do with going to work every day, forever, and coming home alone. To nothing.
Does this woman ever finally wake up to the lies she was told her entire life? Lies that have turned her life into an enormous train-wreck and which have left her in this predicament, where she is only 40 and has another 40 years to go, alone. That she completely trashed her entire life within the span of only a few years. Will she ever wake up to the truth of the lies she was told?
When she meets MGTOW, or other good decent men who want absolutely no association with her and most certainly will never entertain any notion of ever marrying her: will she get it?”
From the above link.
Will any of them ever get it before its too late??
Bloom is trying to save even one.
I give her props but it is whispering in a thunderstorm.
RPG,
I am glad that you are with us! I’d bet a doughnut that you were a wonderful child.
Horseman,
Outstanding find. I still wonder what will happen when these women give voice to their predicament.
“Because these good men really are GOOD MEN, and they don’t want bad women.”
All of Blooms work in one sentence.
(Horseman mike drops, exit stage left)
Fuzz. To answer your question
http://mgtowpanic.com/mgtow-life/234-women-s-reaction-to-mgtow.html
Another outstanding post, Horseman.
I have been watching a few reviews on youtube of the Women’s March and I have the terrible feeling that, while they tried, they didn’t cover themselves in enough manure. It will be forgotten.
Wow.
Men don’t need better options
Just stick in her ass or blow your load down her throat.
I think that of course Life is most valuable – but if you never were in that situation you cannot fathom the pain and uncertainty. Especially if the pregnancy was an IUD/Pill ups. Cause lets face it: Women do sacrifice part of themselves in pregnancy. Men sacrifice nothing. So I think they should be heard but ultimately if they cannot/will not support then abortion is the way to go.
And she was glad that she had my bother and me, small parts of my dad living on. She could see him in us, in behaviors or physical traits, and it comforted her.
This is what rape victims fear. Seeing the Rapist in the child. Love is not possible then. Whatever the Pro Life radicals are saying. Love is not possible, only in some cases tolerance.
Horseman
I read both of the articles. I do not fit the profile that they speak to, I have been a redpill type of woman my whole life. It was the way I was raised.
But here I sit crying my heart and soul out. Because I will be living the same life as those women.
My partner (husband, SO, whatever you want to call him) of 27 years died Tuesday morning. I am old but not elderly. I probably have another twenty years or more. And I will be alone. I do have children and family but they are all a fair distance away.
It is strange how quiet a house can be without another heart beating in it.
Men usually die before their partner, I envy them.
Linny *hug*
Condolences I give
I do not encourage people to have abortion but I still wouldn’t shame others for that choice. We do not no what people unknown to us have endured and why they would do an abortion. Bad things don’t only happen to people who are being stupid, ignorant or incapable to choose a good man.
When I was 16 a very good friend of mine (same age) was attacked and raped. As a result she became pregnant. In the end she didn’t have to choose what to do since she miscarried but I do remember that horrible time when we talked about what options she has. The incident traumatized her for years and she even tried to commit a suicide. I wouldn’t have considered her a bad person if she had an abortion.
Abortion IMO is killing a baby. When someone is your mortal enemy, so are their offspring and their friends/allies. It is gruesome to think that your own offspring is simultanuously your enemy and your blood. I think that you *can* love a rapists child, because it is half yours and the rapey genes do not constitute all of the fathers makeup (one of my brothers believes if all rapists children were aborted, the genes would die out!). But I would understand it as a way of being thorough about their enemies if someone killed their helpless babies, especially in the case of a risky pregnancy where the rest of family suffered a lot. There is of course the option of giving it up for adoption, which leaves mother with the burdens of pregnancy but also the blessings (no periods, healing power of stem cells, none of the health risks that abortions bring).
I do not think it is right or just to kill a child for the crimes of the parent, but it is natural and understandable to want to do so all the same.
The odds are minimal and I don’t think you can ever really know before it happens to you anyway. But the discussion, I think, is still useful, to help people define their ideas and morals.
Linny
Sincere sympathies. I am coming up on 11,000 days w the mrs. I can actually imagine your loss. We here and at Spawnys are here if you need us.
Ladies like Linny are different than the womenz.
She had a long time partner, went thru the tough times, might have thought of it but never bailed.
Now she has genuine loss. But at least fond memories of a life together well lived.
For this she deserves or empasthy and support.
The womenz who blow it up by choice and it doesnt work out for them.
They have not had loss.
They discarded. They are feeling the results of thier actions.
For this they deserve …
Nothing.
Linny is an innocent victim of fate, there but for grace go I.
Alone womenz are the recievers, not victims, of karma. There by knowledge do I not go.
Our empathy and support
Linny,
I am sorry for your loss. In my book, you are all right. I did have an errant thought as I read your comment. If you wake up in the middle of the night craving a hamburger, go out and get one. I have no idea where that came from.
I think that you *can* love a rapists child, because it is half yours and the rapey genes do not constitute all of the fathers makeup (one of my brothers believes if all rapists children were aborted, the genes would die out!).
No. -Ask children of rape victims, ask them if their parents truly loved them. I bet most of them would say no!
What mother is going to burden her child with that? No child is responsible for that, not should they be burdened with it.
It sounds like feminist hyperbole.
I don’t know anyone who was raped. But I do know many people who *had to get married* including one sister. Now this was a couple of generations back when the pill was brand new and not as available to young people as it is today.
Some that I was close to admitted that they did not love their *love child* as much during the pregnancy as their other children That during the early pregnancy they had hopes and thoughts that life would be better if something should happen to end that pregnancy. None considered abortion but I’m not sure if that was an option in my area back then. I was very naive. I am not even sure when I became aware that abortion existed but I was already married by the time I did.
Almost all of the people involved had problems with these children. And many are still not on the best of terms as a family. So I believe babies come into this world knowing whether or not they were wanted. Some like my sister were able to turn things around as the years went by and some not.
I also know of many who opted to put their baby up for adoption. My own children had friends who were adopted and many of those had problems with that. But those who found their biological parents usually were glad that they had been *given up*. They learned that their lives would have been very different if it had not happened and different in not so good a way.
So I don’t know how I feel about abortion. In the case of rape, real rape perhaps I could justify it but to use it as a form of birth control I cannot accept that.
As a side note about 90% of those I know who had to get married ended up divorced. Some sooner and some later.
If I were fertile and engaging in unmarried sex I would want more than one form of birth control to be used. Just thinking about having to make decisions about an unborn child makes me upset. I am so glad I never had to face that.
Thank you, everyone for your kind words on my loss.
It is still so new that I am over run with all the different emotions. Right now I am glad I live alone and do not have to share my emotions with anyone in person. And I am glad that there will be no funeral or service as was his desire.
It’s hard enough going out to the store. This is a very small town so everyone knows. I am a very private person in real life so having to deal with people in public is very hard for me. And, of course, everyone is shocked because he was pretty young to die suddenly. It was not as sudden to me but it was to those who did not live in this house.
@emscherweib
> Ask children of rape victims, ask them if their parents truly loved them.
Ask any child of a RadFem mother if she (or – God forbid – he) have been truly loved. Actually – you don’t have too ask, here’re the memoirs by one of them: https://www.amazon.co.uk/d/Books/Abbreviated-Life-Memoir-Ariel-Leve/0062269453/
From the reviews: “Her mother was a monster. Leve became an emotional fugitive. Her mother lied to her. She failed to show her love or provide security and consistency. No matter how much Leve tried to show her mother she wanted to be loved her mother demanded more in return. She demanded attention, company and admiration. Lee’s father lived in Thailand. At the age of 45, something altered. Leve had escaped New York and her mother’s tentacles, and had gone to spend her birthday with her Dad in Bali. She decided to stay.”
“As an adult, she once crossed paths with a former party guest, who told a mutual acquaintance, ‘I always wondered how that little girl would survive. I thought her only choices were suicide or murder.’”
As I say, abortion service is a must until there’s a single feminist among American women. We shouldn’t allow kids to be born into life of suffering.
Feminists are having babies all the time. May God help the children.
Linny,
Do try to get out more.
I had a conversation with my wife yesterday and I am wondering what some of you think about a few ideas.
First, sorry this is off topic of the original post. And I try and leave religion out of my comments here but this conversation was based on the bible so……
Yesterday my wife and I were talking about 1 Corinthians 7:3-5, here is the text :
3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
At one point my wife says something along the lines of ‘This scripture makes me feel like my body is not my own. That after a women gets married she no longer has a say regarding her body’.
While thinking about this I realized that I can not completely relate to that because I don’t think my body is my own. The government could call me for cannon fodder at anytime. God could do the same. I would gladly lay down my life for my wife and family or toil away and use my strength for them.
Eventually, I came back and told my wife that I find it interesting that she uses the same logic that feminist use to make sure that hook up culture is not condemned and that it is the same logic that pro-choice people use to legitimize abortion. So, I asked my wife; “Aren’t most of gods commandments in one way or another placing limits on your body and what you do with it?” She agreed with that concept.
So here are my question to any of you who are willing to respond.
Where does this concept of ‘my body, my choice’ come from?
Do men think or feel this concept of ‘my body, my choice’? This might be one thing that MGTOW has adopted from feminism.
Other thoughts about the ‘my body, my choice’ concept/feeling.
All I can say is that it is a twentieth century feminist slogan used to excuse all manner of sins. It is written to appeal to those who are solipsistic.
Go figure, that is an interesting discussion! I would agree the passage says you are actually giving your body up to each other, it is no longer “yours” but “ours.” Both ways.
I will have to ponder on the where “my body, my choice” comes from….
I feel very strongly that my body, my choice, but for me it means: MY choice to whom I give myself in marriage, MY choice to take or leave the doctors orders, that sort of thing. A baby has his own body.
Telling a child they were the product of rape IMO is tantamount to abuse. I don’t even want my children to know when their delivery was difficult. Children can be consumed by guilt even over little things. What Fuzzster said, don’t burden them unless they need to know (say, for genetic disease risks). I know many children with impossible genetic expressions (blue eyed parents with brown eyed kids). Better not to ask.
I also disagree with a government that forces people to join the army. That’s slavery. If a country cannot awaken enough national pride to come by enough volunteers, they’re going to lose the war anyway.