I hate to break the news, but based on observations of my friends in their mid to late 70s, one is never so old that “game” is unnecessary.
Let me explain… I discussed this couple a few weeks back here. Let’s call them Dick and Jane, after the popular learn to read books of their era.
Well Dick is getting back surgery, and for the past few weeks he’s subtly been testing Jane to see if he can count on her.
Dick usually drives when they go out on dates, and Jane can at times get pretty tipsy. Dick is usually really good about patiently steadying her and getting her to the car and home safely.
A few weeks ago Dick told Jane she needed to dial it back a bit, not get so tipsy. Well typical of a woman today, her response was, “You can’t tell me what to do!”
Rather than listen, Jane started acting like a bratty rebellious teenager. Dick warned her once, then started abruptly getting up, informing her it was time to go, and unceremoniously dropping her off at home to think about it. Last weekend he showed up, no Jane. She hadn’t listened, and so rather than invite her along, he left her to cool her heels.
On Sunday Dick shows up, but no Jane. So of course I ask, and he says they had gone to the Lodge the night before. When he told Jane it was time to go, she told him to go ahead, she’d find her own ride home! And so he did.
As he was telling the tale, his phone rang. Jane. He didn’t pick up.
For days he did the same. No answer.
So I ask him about his upcoming surgery in two days, and if he had a ride. When he said no, he’d drive himself, I said, “Poppycock, that’s nonsense. I will drive you. And I want you to stay at my house a day or two after, as well. So I don’t worry.”
“M’kay,” he said with a little grin.
So the girls and I made up a cozy single bed in the living room, near the bathroom, no need to climb stairs, complete with ultra soft pillows and nice fluffy blankets. I added a cart with rollers so he can easily get to things, and the girls added finishing touches with a lamp, clock, and plant. I resisted adding a teddy bear, thinking that was probably too much.
Last night I send Jane a text. “How are you? What’s up with you and Dick?”
“I don’t know,” she says. “I hear you are taking him to the hospital in the morning.”
“Yes,” I replied. “Let’s talk in the morning.”
She called this morning first thing. And guess who got up at the crack of dawn and drove to Dick’s? Yep. Jane. She was calling from his place.
“Do you want us to pick you up,” she asked?
“Sure,” I said. And so we all rode together, and all seems well. I am unsure if Dick will be recovering at my place but if so, we’re ready!
Jane is with him now, as he changes into his hospital gown and they prep him for surgery. I pray his room will be filled with angels and that all goes smoothly and the surgery brings him relief from the constant pain. (Please feel free to pray for him, too!)
I guess awalt, no matter how old they get. And that dread works at any age, too!
I plan to have a talk with Jane when I get a chance, to explain the test and how she failed it, and hopefully she’ll do different next time!
Of course she’s going. He can’t be in the presence of the hot Ukrainian doctor without her, right? ;P
A man’s burden of performance never ends… until he dies And modern women still wonder why they can’t find themselves a good man.
His burden of performance never ends.
But his tolerence for bullshit games does.
Inevitibly.
I am surprised he picked up at all. After days of not he has established in his mind, hopefully hers, that he does not NEED her (because he doubts he can count on her)
So she is relying on WANTING her. And 70 year olds want for little.
Unfortunately I still have to remind my Mrs that I do not need her, I am very self sufficient thank you very much. It is her place to make me want her as it is mine to make her want me.
But if the want goes away I will simply stop performing and let the inevitable happen.
P.s. given the demographics of 60+ men and woman, she should know she is fungible, like five to one.
Well Dick is getting back surgery, and for the past few weeks he’s subtly been testing Jane to see if he can count on her.
THE line.
Mrs. Knows beyond a shadow of a doubt this would be a dealbreaker for me.
Forget, pretty, nice, supportive, what have you in any form of relationship
IF I CANT COUNT ON YOU, GO AWAY……….. FOREVER.
You become an amusement, a triffgle, a nothing.
A buddy needs help working
The kids need guidance
The Mrs need emotional support or just someone to clean up after the cats
They count on me. And I them.
Ring.
I need you.
Be there in 5.
If there is any doubt how this would go down
….Done. On both sides.
I would have cut her loose.
But I am an asshole with few friends and high expectations.
ALL my friends are “bring a shovel” friends.
Yes its Al but notice the bit about NEEDing women.
Also notice how he schools her and her reaction (good day Marci.)
The teddy bear would have been a nice touch. If there were objections, you could lay it off on the small one.
The matter of being “tipsy” is a concern. If they went out and he couldn’t drive, they would be stuck. There was girl in my life years ago and everything was great, except for her being a weekend drunk. I was as helpful as I could be to seeing her off to Canada.
Horseman,
I had forgotten about Marci. She does represent the stereotype.
You are a red pill angel!
The surgery was a success and my friend is already in less pain and is walking faster than before! Yay!
Good to hear, but I will never know his reaction to the teddy bear.
Hottie Ukrainian Doctor doesn’t mess around.
She showed up unannounced, he’s not been particularly warm to her. I have a feeling it’s not over yet.
Maybe I will slip that teddy bear on the bed quick before he gets in! Lol! Heading home now…
RPG,
Boys never get so old that they forget how valuable teddy bears are to kids. It will look good for your daughter to loan him out.
Besides wanting to be a good neighbor to a friend in need, I also wanted to grab this teachable moment for my girls. They are excited to host and play nurse, to show respect and care toward a man who is ill. And the have embraced it w gusto! 🙂 Dick seems to be enjoying all the fuss, too!
It is the wrong season for hot chocolate. Chocolate milk?
How old is Jane? To me her behavior sounded like that of a 14-year-old.
In this case I would not say awalt because I could not imagine any of my relatives or friends acting that way.
Anyone in pain or recovering from surgery once visitors leave become children. Leave his new best friend on the bed. He will make jokes but in the dark watches of the night it will be a comfort.
We need an update, please.
@rosalie, I am glad to hear your female relatives are more mature than Jane. When I say await what I mean really is all women have the potential, not that all women do or will act on their basest level. What it means is the programming is there, in every woman, to be hypergamepus and such. The restraints on women by society were intended to and did keep those things in check but today too many feel no shame in doing whatever, and that’s not good. IMHO.
@ fuzzie Dick is doing great! He slept well and reported this morning except for some mild pain at the incision site, he’s feeling no pain. And less pain than he felt before by far, even w the incision pain. We fed him a hearty breakfast and he just had Jame pick him up (she lives 5 min away but in a very small place where there wasn’t room for Dick to recover, possibly her landlord who lives on the same property has rules against guests as well, not sure). Before he went I made him look me in the eye and promise not to overdo it even if he’s feeling better, and he did. And I told them both if he’s feeling poorly as the day goes on the offer for him to recover here still stands.
RPG,
That is good news. It is also good news about Jane. Since no mention was made of a teddy bear, I’ll assume that your daughter never decorated his bed with one.
@ Fuzzie, actually I did sneak in and add the teddy bear but my youngest reclaimed it before Dick noticed it! 🙂
Wondering how y’all feel about this commercial.
Starts out touching, obviously single dad with his son.
Then ends implying the tyke is with his single dad only because mom died.
Either go after the mgtow market (who have lots of money for houses)
Or take the plunge and fully embrace the single divorced dad market.
Al Bundy was a visionary
Horseman,
I thought is was poignant. But there is a message in that it reinforces single parents as widows and widowers.
RPG,
Did she remove the bear because she was embarrassed, or because she was worried that the bear would be see as a gift, not a loan?
@fuzzie, I am guessing she was worried he may keep the bear! 🙂
RPG,
I am smiling and nodding my head over that one. 🙂
Bears valuable they are
Much affection is invested in them.
Thanks for clarifying and sorry about my mistake. There is a little language barrier from my part (my native language is not english) so I might sometimes understand thing the wrong way or too literally.
No worries, Rosalie! 🙂
Just checking in and saw this. I think I spilled my guts awhile back about the situation with me and the new GF. I had surgery myself not too long ago. Tested her as well. We had a pre-surgery meeting at the hospital where they went over the procedure and the recovery. Met her there and we went together. She showed up the day of surgery in the afternoon (had early am surgery) and she stayed with me for hours. Would have stayed all night but I encouraged her to go home. So she did. And returned the next day and when i checked out … she drove me home. And stayed the night to make sure I was alright. TOTALLY FUCKING AWESOME.
Men need to know this shit. Life happens and sometimes a guy gets knocked down. He needs to know if his woman will have his back. He’s got her’s. He knows that. She knows that. For women … not so much. Its a big test. The GF passed with flying colors. Totally awesome. Off the charts. Not only passed the test … ACED IT.
Anyway … just wanted to weigh in and say this is real life stuff. It happens. Men need to know. Women need to know. Its part of being in a relationship. If something happens … does she have my back ??? And its REALLY NICE … to know the answer .. especially if the answer is yes.
Exactly, Mega. I hope my telling these stories helps people see red pill ideas in a real world situation. Both men and women should seek someone who isn’t only fair weather and fun times because… storms hit. Hopefully few and mild but it’s no fun to find out when you need them most that they aren’t all in… So glad you have found someone who gets that!