Women bemoaning the state of affairs between men and women today should stop blaming the guys for, “Not stepping up,” and start taking ownership for how the changes women collectively demanded unintentionally led to where we are today.
Before the division of labor was fairly straightforward: he earned the money, she ran the home. It wasn’t perfect perhaps, but people had more time off then, less angst, and lived pretty stable lives.
Enter feminism. “We want equal rights!” was the mantra of the day, but in reality it wasn’t about equality, it was about special rights. It was about wanting all the perceived upsides of being a man, plus a strong social safety net that would guarantee she’d win in any dispute or divorce settlement. And there were plenty of social programs created to make sure if these independent women couldn’t be truly independent, the State could step in as Daddy govt.
Well, men aren’t blind, or stupid. For the first few decades they tried to play along, until it became all too obvious they were the automatic losers in this new social order. No other person can be discriminated against anymore *except* the “privileged” white male. So much for equality.
Problem was, those supposed “ebul guys” were by and large the same ones who had built a functioning and safe society now being torn apart. They were shamed. Divorce raped. Accused of assault and other crimes for minor infractions (like “he looked at me!” Or “I did it at the time but regretted it later so that’s his fault!”) And then, they checked out.
It wasn’t a movement. There was no rallying cry. Most knew nothing of the red pill or the manosphere. But they knew it was a game they couldn’t win, so one by one they dropped out.
Instead of looking to marry and raise children they accepted serial monogamy or open relationships. Instead of building a career they worked just enough to support their hobbies and lifestyle. And instead of building a safe and secure world for women, they started to just build a safe and secure world for themselves.
So rather than shame them for being, “basement dwelling losers,” it may be time to realize they have come up with a new way to win. Checking out.
Careful what you wish for. You may find you have to live life as a single independent self supporting female responsible for her own financial security and retirement as well as fixing whatever breaks, whether you want to or not.
Checkmate!
Let those with ears hear.
Notes From a Red Pill Girl 
Ton … you around these parts ? I got a faggot who needs the shit kicked out of him. Goes by RichardP. Need an airline ticket to where that faggot lives … I got your back. Just tell me where to send the check. Just make sure that faggot learns that when men are in a foxhole being shot at … kill or be killed. A faggot like RichardP tells the MAN TRYING TO SLIT HIS THROAT that while there are 2 sexes … there really are 39 varieties of faggots, lesbians, trannies, and whatever the fuck else they made up this week. And don’t make me stop talking while Mr 39 GENDERS GETS HIS THROAT SLIT. Or … if you want … just kick his ass to teach him a lesson. Or maybe he’s just a troll. Ha … think ??? Or maybe its just Ash …
Richard
Oh yeah, it was blatant. Started kicking around ideas then. Went to her father to ask permission a week later.
It was less a question than an acknowledgement that it was just going to happen.
Sorry … guess I was just in a bad mood. But seriously … who the fuck thinks there are 39 different varieties of people … while only 2 genders.
Mega,
I let it pass, thinking he was making fun of those who believed it. That is the problem with this part of the internet, whatever feminists say is credible coming from them because they are nuts.
Richard P caught me recently linking a post that I thought was legitimate that turned out to be satire. I did not expect that from my source. Again, that is the problem with feminists, anything they say gets taken at face value.
If we repeat what they say, we have to spell it out as sarcasm or satire.
Thanks fuzzie … thought maybe it was just me. Glad to know that others get caught up in it too.
Ran across this the other day. Thought you might enjoy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZiJkicepzM
Not a bear. But still made me cry.
Mega,
I like that video. Before I saw it, I thought that feral males could not be brought in the house. He socialized really well with the kittens.
I will raise you a bear video and it won’t make you cry.
Think bloom is dealing with kittens now too. So maybe she’d like it …
In the prior comments, she has said that the night before last they “slept” with her. Last night, they were with hr younger daughter. She didn’t sleep too well.
@ horseman and fuzzie, I am not so sure I could just ask her to leave at this point, although trust me I am very much regretting ever extending the offer. Trying to do things “right” I had her sign an agreement with a six month term. And the amount due in exchange, in cash or labor valued at $15 per hour. In my mind that was limiting the length of the stay, vs having no formal agreement. If she doesn’t do her “time” that’s fine, but she’s agreed that in that case she’s choosing to pay the cash equivalent or difference instead. The time sheet may not be legally enforceable but I felt it was a reminder of our “deal” and gives me the chance monthly to “tally” her hours and since we both initial the date and work done, there’s no padding the hours. I realize its not perfect, but something I have found w cons and users is that they don’t like being held to the deal. If it annoys her, she’ll seek another place, an easier place. I get the feeling she’s already doing so. That would be for the best if she’s not truly interested in getting it together, but in finding a free ride.
Case in point, we’ e all got some early fall crud. Yesterday she tried to pull the, “I am not feeling well,” to which I replied, “yeah I have the same thing, plus the hurt shoulder. But it’s go time around here so we all need to buck up and power thru. Here’s some zinc and vitamin c drops, do your best to stay well.” And she went out and worked. She may not have liked it, but how could she say she needs to go lay down knowing I am worse off and not doing so?
Anyway I share your concerns, trust me. And wish I could go back. Luckily she’s not so bright to be truly a con, so I think I can stay ahead of her in a way that will chafe if her intent truly was to move in, never work again, freeload. Sorry, that’s just not the deal here. She can move to Vegas and live w her folks and do that (but probably not even there.)
I have a nice place and a good life but its not free for me. I work hard to have this. I also don’t have the extra to support anyone but my own kids. I made that clear to her, that she needs to *lighten my load* while I in exchange lighten hers.
Otter was the one to suggest this whole mess. He’s got a room at his house, if it doesn’t work I’ll be insisting he open up to her. And I know he’d make that happen if I asked.
RPG,
Sounds good.That she has Otter as a fall back is a plus. Keeping the cops out of it would be the best. I have been there and I have no idea what kind of stories she told him. She was in arrears by lot and it was threatening to sink the whole houseshare.
RPG, I think that you are on VERY thin ice with that female.
@fizzie and Larry agreed. I am suspecting she’ll never move out of the camper bc she never really wanted to move in here. Her bf will be done w his elk hunt soon, perhaps she’ll knuckle him into getting a place together, or a place for her, then. Or move to Vegas if not, or something… I know that’s not a great strategy but I am afraid she’s in here now (sorta) so I am watching and waiting. Her attitude and body language is of short time vs. embracing this, so perhaps it was always against her will, but she had no other offers. Not sure… Making things not too easy or comfortable is my current strategy. She may bounce on her own soon is my prediction.
That would be best. There is one thing. It is not like she is deliberately making trouble. That is good too.
“Otter was the one to suggest this whole mess. He’s got a room at his house, if it doesn’t work I’ll be insisting he open up to her. And I know he’d make that happen if I asked.”
Ouch. Ex-wife moving back in. I’d stay far away. ;P That’s probably not going to work too well if she’s got a boyfriend, even if he also doesn’t really want her around either.
I think that A Dad brought up a good point. The kindest way to describe that arrangement would be “awkward”.
If (when) my ex-wife crashes and burns, I’m not letting her back in. I already got out way better than a lot of guys with the divorce rape. Letting her back in would be suicide.
Besides. I’m hang new manly wall art, man-decorating, and repainting some rooms soon. I wouldn’t want her to come back and try to de-man-cave the place.
oookay….I am astonished somewhat….letting an ex-wife move in????Seriously???? LOL….OMG, I can’t believe any man would or should even consider that situation.
Perhaps a small explanation is in order. When I divorced my ex many, many years ago she quickly became homeless due to her sheer stupidly. I was told this by a mutual acquaintance and it was suggested I “should help” a bit. Told the friend to find her a cardboard box so she could stay out of the rain. IMO ex-wives forfeit ALL rights, considerations and compassion from ex-husbands.
@ Larry and dad, agreed in most cases an ex moving in would be totally unacceptable. Otter is very different than most guys, or at least appears to be. They are still good platonic friends, not bc she *deserves* it but bc he chooses to grant it. Their divorce was years ago, and he seems very over her and over it. It’s almost like it amuses him, to remain in contact. And I am sure he will do so for life, from a distance. He has been much less there for her after all her recent nonsense. Sadly I think she drove away her two biggest male supporters. And it’s more than a little ironic that now the guy she did t have faith in is thriving and is learning a skill that can easily make him hundreds of dollars per hour! And he’s darn good at it, too! When she complained the other day, she hardly hears from him, I said, yeah I miss him too but am so happy to see him so happy!” And it’s true!
There was a commenter that I met at SSM’s old blog who became fond of. She had been dumped by her husband because he took up with another woman and got her pregnant. They still talked to each other and had two daughters. She was a devout Catholic. She could divorce, but she could not remarry. Her only option was to remain free to reconcile to stay within her beliefs.
Still, I can see Larry G’s point. That is asking a lot from a man after getting dumped.
RPG – This is the same woman who, about a week ago, said something like: “Can your ex-husband divorce you from being a friend?” or something like that. His continued involvement in her life just enables her poor behavior.
Ex’s simply cease to exist. Period.
Compassionately, emotionally, morally.
Their life does not influence or intersect yours. Period.
They are the uninteresting stranger caregiver of you children where court ordered and the unworthy recipient of your divorce taxes where court ordered. Period.
Except for court ordered interactions once they step thru that door they teleport to the moon and like a star trek episode, the previous timeline is forever changed.
Unless you adapt this mindset you become their bitch.
And who wants to be the Bitch’s bitch??
(Or the Asshole’s asshole as thge case may be.)
Its called self respect and consequences people!!
“@ horseman and fuzzie, I am not so sure I could just ask her to leave at this point, although trust me I am very much regretting ever extending the offer”
Why not?
I’m not being an asshole. Why not? Reason.
Cause its rude?
Cause you feel sorry for her?
Cause you are honouring your bargain?
All up against the drama and potential danger in your hard fought for farm and life.
Is it because it would be hard, cause a scene or make bad feelings?
Versus the likelyhood of a scene you can imagine coming?
Not saying you should just want you to look at it objectively and rationally.
“Horseman why do you say No all the time?”
“Because I CAN. I don’t Owe anyone anything. So if I say yes its because I choose to out of generousity or because it serves me. I am not obligated social or morally to do squat.”
P.s. I will gladly ask her for you. Seriously.
P.p.s. if its honouring your bargain I can respect that as long as the bargain is in place.
RPG, I call bullshit on this
“…. I am not so sure I could just ask her to leave at this point, although trust me I am very much regretting ever extending the offer””
ASK?? Hell no. Demand & Enforce, yup you betcha. What exactly do you think you owe this wonderful piece of work?
and this should be etched into a “get well” card for every divorced man.
Ex’s simply cease to exist. Period.
Compassionately, emotionally, morally.
And to remain “friends” with these super-stupid women??? Um, sure…sounds like a very sound plan (sarcasm switch on the full ON position) to me.
Between what A dad, Horseman, and Larry G are saying, I hope that dispels any thoughts on women reading this to pull on the heartstrings of ex-husbands for favors. Frivorce comes at a cost and the largest is losing half of your team. To expand on this, this should be the point of the whole post. Don’t dump hubby!
@ horseman yes I am honoring my side of the deal so long as the deal is in place. I am not sure how long she will keep up her end of the deal, but I can keep up my end until then. Any past that? No.
RPG,
What makes for a good houseshare roomie is attitude and the attitude is based on the the roomie needing the houseshare more than the houseshare needs the roomie. In California, I could not live within my means any other way. You would think that most people can see that. There weren’t that many shared living opportunities there.
Fuzzie – I think that most men would do anything for their wives. I know I would have. Once the ties are severed, however.
Now I just want her to stop contacting me, but it’s impossible with the kid.
She’s a “strong independent woman”, except for the fact that she relies on me to essentially pay her rent every month. It’s sorta humorous, in a way.
A Dad, I understand the regular guy’s absolute devotion. Women have no idea that that went away when they burned down the bridges.
@ fuzzie and dad, interesting re absolute devotion. I know I was told over and over via multiple sources (family, friends, school, media) growing up how “women can’t depend on a man” and “have your own income just in case” and other such things suggesting men are always on the verge of walking out on a woman. Perhaps cads do, but I think a lot if women are mislead to think most guys are this way. Not sure if it was projection, or bad boy wisdom, or what that propaganda was about but I heard absolutely nowhere that if a man loves a woman he’s absolutely all in. Such an unhealthy way to lead women to think. I know such “truths” led me to never really trust my marriage and to always be looking for the shoe to drop rather than being all in myself. I wish I had known this then!
RPG,
Feminists to play on women’s fears to promote hate. What you described is a big one. It might be projection or it might be preparing to be attracted to cads.
So true fuzzie, so much of feminism plays on women’s worst fears and projects the worst case onto every case. I remember in college my women’s studies prof (the class was required to graduate) claimed ALL men were rapists and abusers. ALL OF THEM. When I questioned it and said my future husband, then fiancée, wasn’t, she basically said I was lying and in denial about my abuse! It was that crackpot and that class that made me start questioning what feminism really WAS about! It didn’t seem to be about equality…
Speaking of vilifying males, I was watching the interaction of a lesbian millennial couple this weekend and it kindof struck me that they seemed to be together because “it was safe.” And it made me wonder if their relationship stemmed from being told all men are ebul all their lives? Or maybe it was just bc it was trendy, as they certainly seemed to be enjoying the shock factor and attention from their obvious and quite honestly inappropriate PDAs (inappropriate as in I could not imagine a hetero coulle doing so in public to that degree.) These are both lovely young women, not at all the stereotypical “butch” lesbians.
RPG,
I don’t know why feminists go so far to foster in women for men. It is antisocial. Radicals believe that all p in v sex is rape. How they came to that conclusion is beyond reason.
As for the “lesbians”, I don’t think they are real. Milo Yiannopolis has alluded to his believing that most of them are fake, but he has not elaborated on it.
There is a new post at Spawny’s
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2017/09/24/which-one-or-rather-which-group/
I have to add something to that. There was a blogger that kept close tabs on OkCupid. He was shocked a couple of years ago when half the women in his age group self identified as bisexual.It was reported in OkCupid’s newsletter, that when people say they are bisexual, most of their messages go to one sex.
He was shocked a couple of years ago when half the women in his age group self identified as bisexual.It was reported in OkCupid’s newsletter
I wonder what the deal is with all of this casual lesbian stuff that modern young women have. Perhaps it is the “in thing” to do while in their twenties. To “explore and shit”.
Farm Boy,
There is a very strong social taboo about men exploring that option, It has been in place since the Old Testament. For women, there is no prohibition and lesbians are not mentioned in the Bible at all. It is very odd. I once dated a woman who said that she couldn’t see men as attractive, but could for women. Do you think that this could be reinforced through media?
I think that it is more than just the Bible. Most fellas have a built-in revulsion to what gay guys do.
ALL men were rapists and abusers. ALL OF THEM. When I questioned it and said my future husband, then fiancée, wasn’t, she basically said I was lying and in denial about my abuse!
One wonders how these people are taken seriously, but they are
“One wonders how these people are taken seriously, but they are.”
You would think it would be culturally to preach hate against half the population, the productive half and the half women need to carry them through reproduction and child rearing. I submit that something is very broken in our culture.
Posted this comment at Spawnys but applicable here.
New article in Canadas biggest paper.
And reading the comments (the usual blue pill drivel) they all miss the important line of Wente’s piece
“Spend a little time with single women in their early to mid-30s, and you’ll be grateful you’re not one of them”
Early to mid 30s. To find a man!
By the time he is locked down and married you are mid to late 30s.
Read my lips Past Childbearing Age!
What purpose do you bring a man to marry if you cannot produce children?
Sex, companionship, comfort? All can be had without the need to commit.
From now on I am only going to ask one question: is the whining woman over 32?
If yes “move along, nothing to see here, self evident.”
https://beta.theglobeandmail.com/opinion/why-are-good-men-so-hard-to-find/article36365252/
Bloom
Thats what I thought. Good for you to be honoiurable. Just be careful.
To restate what I said over there. Ms. Wente is fully paid into the apex fallacy. This is going to cripple women. They only perceive top tier men.
RPG – Feminism is all about a woman not having any dependence upon men, so of course it’s in the best interests to claim that you need to be able to do it on your own. That is not to say that there isn’t some potential level of power disparity. This is why so many women claim to be “liberated” from men with no-fault divorce and the equal potential for earning income and owning property. But in a proper relationship, I think that men and women compliment one another. When it becomes a power struggle. then, of course there will be problems.
Everyone has a job to do in a family. Modern feminist initiatives teach women that if they are not earning equal pay then they are not equally important in the marriage. It doesn’t really work that way. What was once complimentary then becomes conflict and chaos. So, whatever. Moms can stick their babies in daycare rather than be proper mothers, just so they can be “equal” to their husbands.
I have no problem with women earning as much as men, let alone working the same jobs, but I do have a problem with mothers who think that rearing children is a trivial thing. Feminism teaches women that it’s okay to work full-time and still have children. It’s a lie, and it’s a major reason why we have so many maladjusted / messed up people today. If a woman wants to do both, then families need to be prepared to adequately raise their children until they become reasonably self-sufficient and are in middle-school and can be cared for by family, after school. But it doesn’t usually work out that way now.
If men were always “on the verge of walking out on women”, then men probably would make up filing for the 70%-80% of divorces. Not, the other way around. But most men simply don’t walk out on their women. So what you’ve been told could probably be more akin to: “If you don’t get your way, you need to have a way out and the ability to support yourself.” I’ll be the first to admit that I ultimately took away financial control from my ex-wife, but it was because she simply was not a responsible person. I gave her that right, and she couldn’t handle it, and it infuriated her when we got into financial trouble. She blamed me for not “being involved enough”. If you’ve got a job to do, then do the damn job. So I took the job back, got us back into perfect financial shape, and then it infuriated her even more because she wasn’t being included. I’d have included her again if she actually was making money and contributing it to the household, but there is the next problem. When she started earning money, she wanted to only spend the money on herself. She outright refused to contribute to bills and the general costs of living. So I had to nuke our joint accounts and a bad situation got even worse to which I had to ask her to step up. Guess which option she chose when the free ride was over? She left, but not without massive amounts of her own debt (which I luckily didn’t have to take on at all). Unless she remarries, she’ll probably end up in bankruptcy court within 5-10 years.
If you want to be self-sufficient, have at it. But don’t expect someone else to provide when you can give nothing back in return. Expect that being dependent upon someone else will require some guidelines for the best interest of the family. It’s not going to work out if people can’t work together and each add something to the well-being of the family. The old ways might have infuriated some women because they felt like they had no control, but people generally got through it. Statistics are showing that quality of life is pretty crappy for families that live the modern feminist reality. I guess it doesn’t matter to me anymore. My “SIW” ex collects an alimony check every month. She’s only lying to herself about the cause. She blames being a SAHM for just a few years but nevermind the fact that she had no interest in learning a skill or going to school in her late-teens / 20’s, or even 30’s, before being a mother. She’s the kind of woman who’s always just lived off of other people, much like your new roomie who walked out on Otter.
A Dad,
I can’t be just your wife. There has to be a lot of this going around.
Women have always been combative and manipulative. It is naive of men to think that women pointing and shrieking is somehow new. Think of the Temperance movement that was once powerful here in Britain and America. It was middle-aged and plain women who were the propagandists and the shock troops of that movement. Do you remember Carrie Nation? She was a household name in America in the 19th century. Nation travelled the country smashing saloon windows,and got arrested numerous times for doing so.
Middle-aged women have 20 years of greavancies against their husbands which the project on to all men. Young plain women have always been rage zombies because of their horror at the knowledge they’ll never find a man to marry them.
Thanks to television,the Internet and rolling 24/7 news,all of which have a bottomless appetite for stirring up controversy and then actively spreading it far and near we have seen women’s eternal grievances blown up by orders of magnitude. The Internet is a potent socially corrosive entity that should be completely shunned so that it withers on the vine.
Ladies lurking
Look at it from the good stable guys point of view.
If he is a family man type, and guys don’t dream of kids from teenagehood more if it happens it happens.
By 25 he is thru partying, through casual. He is ready to become “respectable”.
But 26 thru say 32 he meets women who say ” just wait a few years.” Or he invests in one maybe two multi year LTRs but when he pops the question she isn’t ready ir doesn’t feel it. So he adapts.
Forget the emotions, you already shame us for fear of rejection (which by this point IS lived experience).
Lifestyle. By 30 he has been making money. Remember this is Mr reliable.
He is getting small promotions. Men live off little so he has disposable income. So he get used to toys, or buys his own house or has investments. A 28 year old in trades or business can make 50k easy (he can do overtime, noit like he has anyone to go home to). He lives of 30. He has 20k a year. To play with, and guys dont buy stupid shit like 500 purses. So say 32. He has had 80k to play with.
So you come along at 32. He has proposed or had LTRs end at least once.
He was ready for kids 5 years ago but couldn’t so the urge was surpressed and he found other ways to leave a legacy, sports, business, philanthropy.
He has had financial freedom to basically do anything, within reason.
His lifestyle, his tastes have changed.
He is still a great guy. Lots of friends, likely involved in the community. But 5-7 years of steady eddie provide for and do for yourself has reinforced his individualism. Exactly what you like in him. The man in charge of himself but not an asshole.
But an individual! At peace with ALONENESS. Not bitter, just used to it, maybe even liking the peace.
So now you want him and his kids.
Love, well he is over finding “the love of his life.” Love is just a faded memory.
Kids, well maybe then but now he has his life mission of the last few years.
Interests, companionship, he has plenty of his own and limes buggering off into the woods with thhe guys foir days at a time.
Your success, meh he has his own and even if he didn’t he has his necessities covered.
Forget the emotional damage in the interim.
You ladies waiting for 5-7 years past his marriage weiundow just creates the bachelor lifestyle you yell against.
Oh. And the smart girls locking him down in the interim. Forgot about those.
What the hell do you expect him to do for seven years waiting for you to be ready??
Just sayin!!
Lets say by luck you meet Mr. Reliable at 32. Marriage by say 34.
Try for kids right away. Defy the ods and get pregnant (bypassing years of IVF and major bucks….yup sign me up for that drama)
First kid at 35.
35. Ten years into his craft.The time of his first major promotion. When his possibility of expanding his career is at the greatest. But you and he want him home with the baby.
38 Second child, and you are pushing 40 so you really dont want to work anymore you are getting tired after all so you would rather stay home. No pressure!
50. The big 50. When the body starts slowing down. The back aches in the morning.
And he has a 15 year old and 12 year old. Hockey, ballet, school trips. 6 am practice.
Yup stamina training for a 50 year old.
55. Double nickels. Remember the Freedom 55 commercials. But oldest needs moving into college and he was up til 3 waiting for the 17 year old to come home so he could yell at her about curfew.
58. Fifty fucking eight. And the youngest finally goes off to school so he can get some piece. And the next week he is downsized to make room for the up and comers.
Oh. And you hit menopause at 48 so he has been dealing with hot flashes and mood swings since the kids were 12 and 10!!
Think about it. Menopause with a ten year old.
This is what you are offering Mr. 1 in 20 Wants kids, nice guy material.
Yup there is a deal!
Any wonder why there are no nice guys at 32.?
Yup from now on reading these stories and articles.
From now on I am only going to ask one question: is the whining woman over 32?
If yes “move along, nothing to see here, self evident.”
She Did It To Herself
She and her sisters Created the men they are encountering.
But what do I know about 32 year old bachelors.
By 32 I was safely past the Seven Year Itch, had two kids, a house and was just promoted to my first management job.
Culture has changed and (for the most part) taken the other pathway to marriage out of circulation. In many of the marriages of my parents generation the man was older than the woman by 10 years or so. Young men having struggled though the Great Depression and then WWII had little time or financial wherewithal to marry … at least the savvier ones or the poorer ones. Post war, they had the opportunity to marry younger (and hotter) women because many of their younger competitors had been buried in Europe or the Pacific. Society treated almost anyone who came back as a hero and thus an Alpha. The boom that came along in the 1950s allowed many to succeed in their spouse’s eyes and thus stifled many problems that might have occurred if she had started wondering if she was married to the “right guy.”
I’ve never particularly wanted to be married (except, as I said in a previous post, theoretically) but I’ve seen over and over women I have dated act very strangely when they had to confront the fact that I was more than a decade older than they were. It’s really not cool any longer, not at all, and I’m not talking about women in their 20s … I’ve seen it all the way to nearly 40 year old women.
I listen to many of the problems put forth by the SIW’s who write articles quoted here and I say if you don’t like Boys, try Men. But Men are less likely to be pushed around. That’s attractive to women but it messes with the man/woman power differential that the culture now claims it wants, ie. “equality.” And so the general culture of women pushes back even though individual women seem to want a more mature man.
Sometimes. On the other hand I’ve run across quite a few younger women completely put off by a guy who was their equal in maturity or intellect. They want the upper hand but then often hate it when they get it.
” always be looking for the shoe to drop ”
I had one girl break up with me because – wait for it – in two years I had never raised my voice or my hand or my temper, and the suspense was killing her!
Alan Kardec…”Society treated almost anyone who came back as a hero and thus an Alpha.”
It does seem possible that there can be a certain amount of collective Alpha in a society…which would suggest that there can also be the opposite. The destruction of societal self-confidence in Europe and America may well have such an effect.
See my review of an Arthur Koestler novel for related thoughts: Sleeping with the Enemy
http://chicagoboyz.net/archives/55587.html
I don’t know whee the rebellion comes from. Some have said it is the sin of Eve. Still, if it is allowed, one way or the other, it will kill the relationship. I have neighbors who are that way. He has retreated into senility and she is miserable.
Lots of men on the red pill girls’ site.
Anyway, not to exacerbate the problem, but one thing Horseman leaves out is that by 32 his Tradesman has seen and discussed first hand what happens to guys making $50K who get divorced after having one or two children. They lose everything they worked for, move into a rented room like a household servant (which he is, as he is indentured to the woman who dumped him), and write checks to an ex- instead of to the finance company for his bike and the mortgage company for his house (occupied now by his ex- or sold).
Or, today, as in my sons’ cases, they simply grew up with an exploded family and watched how divorce treated their dads. Oddly, it doesn’t seem like a good life strategy.
Briefly, lawyers were selling pre-nups as a solution, but women break them routinely (another expense for men: defending a worthless pre-marital contract) for a variety of reasons (“abuse” or “I was manipulated into signing it” or “I had bad legal advice”). So the tradcon males, male feminists and 95% of women destroyed a potential solution to the marriage strike. They destroyed it because women cannot be treated as legal, financial and parental equals in marriage. That’s because, as we’ve been taught since 1970, they’re equals.
This is discussed in detail in Chas. Murray’s great book, “Coming Apart”, but manosphere participants know all about it because they’ve lived it.
This is why late or second marriages are usually to beta males marrying out of their league, or to beta males who fancy themselves white knights. They’ll take what they can get and cross their fingers.
A woman I’ve known for 20 years is an SIW. She’s an airline captain, 39, and free free free and strong strong strong. She’s been quasi-living with a very libertarian, independent businessman type. They had some sort of ooops! pregnancy (gee I wonder how that happened) and decided to marry for the child’s sake (which I applaud, having done that once).
I was still getting invitations to meet up on one of her layovers after she was a) pregnant and b) engaged. I declined.
Back to Horseman’s Lifecycle of a Man outline:
Well. In the weeks leading up to the wedding, and I mean weeks, not months, her fiance rolled out the pre-nup. Now I received a panicked call. “You wouldn’t believe how cold and selfish this pre-nup is!” It was a simple “what’s yours is yours, including debt, and what’s mine is mine, including debt [he has none]” as far as I could tell, since we talked about it. It also gave the father 50% custody in the event of divorce. Shocking!
I had told her once, when she was in her 20’s, that if she loved a man a gesture he would never forget would be her *offering* him the pre-nup. She revisited that in our conversation and said, “Hardly, it’s the meanest thing I’ve ever experienced.”
We’ve been living according to feminist rules since 1980. Apparently, a textbook beneficiary of feminist affirmative action (i.e., female airline pilot) doesn’t want to live by the rules her sex demanded, and won.
I don’t believe in pre-nups, as I noted, but this is highly illustrative of why many men are skeptical, since their women want to live strong and free, unless they pay for it themselves. (Rollo’s two sets of books.) That is, they prefer not to live by the rules they established. The State and its courts and its police and its whatever, agree. Hence a marriage strike.
I’m not sure why this confuses mugged liberals like the Wente chick. Her inability to understand the problem just demonstrates that she thinks of men as utilities (I’d say laboring donkeys) to be utilized, in a woman’s quest for self-actualization. Women get the men they deserve; men didn’t create this environment, not one iota.
My paternal grandmother counted her strength in son’s as well.
It’s old school thinking darling and you are a modern day sort of girl
LOL never asked my ex wife to marry me either.
Didn’t ask her father for permission either.