Today I experienced an example of day game. Day game is a technique of catching a gals attention during the day, when they are going about their daily round. Supposedly day game sneaks in under a gal’s “pick up radar” and some find it more approachable and effective than going to bars or clubs.
I was in a nearby urban area, on a rather “trendy” street because I was looking for something specific. I stopped in the store, had a great experience w the very helpful and friendly sales gal, and then walked out the door w my purchase.
I was just strolling along, probably smiling and lost in thought, not paying much attention when out of the corner of my eye I spotted a very good looking and well dressed man strolling with a friend staring at me with a very intimate look. I could only describe it as the way you would look at someone you love deeply.
Flustered, I blushed, smiled, and kept walking.
Because I was in the city I had exchanged my usual muck boots and flannel for a mid-calf scoop neck (but not low) black t-shirt material dress with 3/4 sleeves and a floaty, feminine floral open jacket on top with black ballet flats. I had my makeup on, hair fixed, and even a necklace, bracelet, and earrings. Pretty dressed up for me but hey it’s “town” so I try to spiff up.
Maybe I reminded him of his sister or something, maybe he likes gals in dresses, who knows, as there were no words exchanged. I could be way off. So I can’t say for sure it was day game or what but if so I have a feeling it works pretty well for him.
I suppose at that point a gal could drop her keys, or ask for the time or directions or something. I am not really sure how that works and while I appreciated the glance I didn’t want to encourage anything more.
I know there’s this perception that guys who do well with women are jerks, and some are, but a lot of Romeo types actually adore women and it is that “fall in love with every girl who walks by” that works in their favor.
Now whether such a man is a good bet long term is questionable. But they do start off as fun and flattering and light.
I know in my case I don’t notice a guy until I notice him noticing me. Just like I would not have noticed this guy today otherwise.
It’s just a field study example. And I just took it as the flattery it was, and thought about how great my guy is, and how glad I am to be off the market. I was never very good at games anyway.
What do you think of day game? Have some examples of your own? Please share in the comments!
“I was just strolling along, probably smiling and lost in thought, not paying much attention when out of the corner of my eye I spotted a very good looking and well dressed man strolling with a friend staring at me with a very intimate look. I could only describe it as the way you would look at someone you love deeply.
Flustered, I blushed, smiled, and kept walking.”
———–
#MeToo
Or it could have just been a guy that smiled at you casually as he walked by, and you took it as being “intimate” and “loving”.
Not hating. I just think that it’s hard to tell what this was really about. I get looks from ladies all of the time, but it’s normally the kinda skanky older single mom across the street or the ladies at the grocery store.
Lol a dad, it was out of the ordinary enough that I noticed it, whatever it was. Took me by surprise actually. I do suspect he doesn’t lack for female company. There was a smoothness to it that made me think it’s his go-to. But who knows? Maybe he was gay and loved my earrings! Lol.
Point noted.
Some slightly nerdy but cute young lady at the sporting goods store made eye contact with me today and smiled and said “hi” or something. I think it’s my dad game, but I just went to the hunting and gun section to scope out a Smith and Wesson M&P.
ADad, may want to look at at Kahr CM9 while you are at it. Bought one and fell in “love” with it
‘I know in my case I don’t notice a guy until I notice him noticing me. Just like I would not have noticed this guy today otherwise.’
Must be some sense a woman has…usually if I look at them (when they aren’t looking at first)…it takes them about 3-5 seconds before their radar starts pinging and they look back.
LOL Day game should be the easiest for men. So many opportunities….
“Must be some sense a woman has…usually if I look at them (when they aren’t looking at first)…it takes them about 3-5 seconds before their radar starts pinging and they look back.”
I’ve definitely noticed it as some kind of “sense.” Sometimes I don’t notice it at all but my husband sees other men watching me (and he’s remarked that I’m not even dressed slutty). But usually if a man is looking I have to actively ignore it and try to not look at them.
Maybe it’s self-mate guarding… it definitely feels like that.
I remember when I was in my very early 20’s I would have women looking and initiating conversation with me and all I was doing was what I always did. I would be sitting on the hood of my car playing guitar, shooting pool in the day room, maybe at a bar when I wasn’t trying to pick up chicks. I’ve had married women grab my hand in public, promise to take showers with me…hell I even had a buddy’s girl dig for gold in my ear with her tongue just hours after she met me.
So as far as “day game” goes I had no idea what was happening, I didn’t even think about it until years later. Perhaps, sometimes, day game is just a guy going about his day.
I know when I was trying to find a girl I had miserable fortunes. Yet the night I met my wife I was like “Screw it, she’s cute I’m talking I don’t care if she likes me or not”. By the end of the night I had a handful of tookus and a mouthful of tongue.
The rest, as they say, is history. So was it game or just a natural?
Anyone know the difference?
It’s always flattering when guys know a classy way to get your attention. A 20 year old approached and asked me out not too long ago. He first introduce himself and shook my hand and everything. This guy knows nothing of game, I later found out. He’s just a polite guy. It was like a scene straight out of a movie.
I even told him I was 33, and he said he would have guessed around 26 but it didn’t matter to him. He said, “When I see a pretty girl, I talk to her.”
That’s how it’s done.
‘ But usually if a man is looking I have to actively ignore it and try to not look at them.’
That’s usually my first inkling if they are taken or not.
Of course having a shiny thing on the ring finger helps too.
“Of course having a shiny thing on the ring finger helps too.”
That’s good you notice that! I think a lot of men don’t. Or they don’t care, which is much worse.
It’s been my experience that it is the married woman who instigates affectionate activity (flirting), and doesn’t seem to care if she is married. Or if the guy she is flirting with is married.
As a married man I have been flirted with by more than a few married women (Humble bragging right?). I don’t think any of those flirtations were of serious intent, but women do seem to do this type of stuff much more often then we might like to admit.
Just sayin’
While in law school nearly 40 years ago aged 23, I was at the grocery checkout line one afternoon with a cart extremely full of beer and party supplies for a big party. Very good looking woman in front of me in line (late 20s maybe early 30s) notices the cart and smiles. I said, “Going to be a BIG party.” She replied, “Looks like you’re going to have fun.” I said, “you should come.” She gave me a big smile, we started to talk, and by the time we’d both paid for our stuff I had a date. She seriously enjoyed partying, the sex was great, and we dated a handful of times.
Anywhere you happen to bump into other people can be an opportunity.
‘It’s been my experience that it is the married woman who instigates affectionate activity (flirting), and doesn’t seem to care if she is married. Or if the guy she is flirting with is married.’
And that’s why they are dangerous to any man who doesn’t have sense. The flattery may make a man feel good…but the end is never good.
“And that’s why they are dangerous to any man who doesn’t have sense. The flattery may make a man feel good…but the end is never good.”
Amen to that. I knew a guy who was having an affair with some married civilian at my first duty station. One day he comes into work with bruises all over his face looking pained. Turns out the woman’s 6ft something husband got his mitts on this guy and explained why boinking his wife was not a good idea.
My thought at the time was that guy screwed up messing with a married woman. Later on my position changed, that chicks husband should have literally kicked her ass out the door and bought the other guy a beer for allowing him to see her true colors.
Why do women seem to always get a free pass when they cheat while the guy they cheat with has to suffer a beating or worse for it. (Rhetorical question by the way)
I tell my wife I not going to fight someone for hitting on you, that’s what guys do. I’ll be more pissed with you if you reciprocate.
Because the scarcity of attractive females is real, when a creature of beauty enters within view, like a moth to the flame a man has to look.
‘My thought at the time was that guy screwed up messing with a married woman. Later on my position changed, that chicks husband should have literally kicked her ass out the door and bought the other guy a beer for allowing him to see her true colors.’
I agree with the part about the wife getting kicked out…but I wouldn’t buy a senseless man a beer.
Roman,
“Why do women seem to always get a free pass when they cheat while the guy they cheat with has to suffer a beating or worse for it.”
Many cheating females do not get a free pass for adultery by any stretch of the imagination. Some pay with their lives.
Wouldnt call it day game. Since he didn’t approach
I would say it’s more about how men react to attractive and feminine women. RPG being a tad of each
A new post at Spawny’s there is
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2018/01/10/blowing-it-big-time/
You guys flatter me but really his expression was more than the average or else I really don’t pay attention. And honestly I mostly am in my own little world.
Right after passing those two guys, a f/m couple passed me. I noticed his reaction was to put his arm around his gf’s neck while staring at the ground while we passed.
After them was a gal about my age walking alone, she had bright purple hair and I could tell she was really looking for some kind of something affirmation like “cool hair!” I totally ignored her.
People watching via a red pill lens can be very amusing. I highly recommend it! I am very often lost in my own thoughts so I usually don’t notice. But when I do people watch, the red pill stuff is all over. From hypergamy to mate guarding and back.
In any case I will never really know but it provided a blog post so there’s that! Lol.
I’ll also admit I was fishing for a new post topic so this rather weak sauce example of day game was that. Lol!
I really do assert though that it’s guys noticing that makes women notice. Not that it always works but it’s a move on the chess board anyway…
Earl, are you speaking from any kind of experience? You never reference any real life experience, but have lots of advice. (“And that’s why they are dangerous to any man who doesn’t have sense. The flattery may make a man feel good…but the end is never good.”)
If not, what’s with the Parson Weems act?
Bloom, “day game” is a PUA term referencing cold-approaching women on the street or coffee bar etc and either picking them up or getting their phone number.Ton’s right.
You experienced some eye contact, which we all enjoy, but it’s not “day game.”
One of my favorite activities in NYC is walking down the street. Women look back. It’s like I’m 6’5″ and wearing a $5000 jacket, or something. Very good for the spring in one’s step.
Once I was in my evening jacket, unshaven and hungover, at 7 a.m. in a coffee bar and a killer female exec said, “That’s just a great look.” I didn’t realize, then, I was supposed to follow up with small talk and offer to walk her to work. I was always a good man then, not good at being a man.
As a man, it’s initially paralyzing to approach a woman in daylight. I don’t think women know how badly most men sweat it. I was flying back from London once and the plane was held for some USG females en route from Afghanistan. I was transfixed with one of them. I helped her with her bag like a proper beta blue pill loser, then spent 8.5 hours trying to figure out how to meet her in the middle of a bunch of colleagues on an airplane. She was three feet away. Never said a word. It was torture. I finally sucked it up in the customs line: last call, last ditch attempt saloon. I had never, in my life, asked a woman for her number. We had dinner and other stuff. We’re still friends, of a sort, now though.
If you’re advising your male friends how to avoid paralysis, just tell them to talk to every female they encounter every day. Not come on to them, just talk to them. The Uber driver, the clerk at the store, the bartender, the librarian. Just talk. Then when you meet someone you want to have dinner with, it’s not a paralyzing moment. I only learned this a few years ago. Day game is brutal for the proper boy or recently divorced man who never approached a woman cold, in public, in his life. Turns out, though, that women appreciate it … some of the time. (I was nuked today.)
“… but women do seem to do this type of stuff much more often then we might like to admit.”
If a married or “involved” woman sees a man who looks fun, or looks like a better deal than the one she has, *she’s coming in.* Blue pill, I didn’t even notice it. I fell in love at 19, that was it in the romance department.
Single and red pill, with the most modest of return gestures, her hands will be handsy. Today, it’s probably exaggerated, because the culture says it’s so cool to be a “nasty woman” who sexes things up indiscriminately like Miley Cyrus or Sharon Stone or Madonna or any number of very strange adult women.
I’ve never known a married woman who was interested in me who did not initiate. Even my best friend’s wife, and he’s been my best friend since we were five years old, so obviously I was the best man at their wedding. Men don’t act this way.
Very true talking to women all the time in all sorts of situations w/o the intention of anything going anywhere is good dress rehearsal for day game.
I don’t think most women realize how men feel when approaching or how difficult it can be.
In the age of #metoo, it’s become downright dangerous. The ironic thing is the same people who pushed for total liberation of convention are now the same ones overreacting to every little thing.
Yesterday Dancer (who is 1/4 Native American) was told by a white sjw that she wasn’t really a minority, for example! The irony was this was in the midst of the same gal lecturing on how some inane thing was racist!
Roman – I think the reason why husband will beat up the other guy is because it is just so much easier to hate the other person than your own spouse. Your feelings of love will not magically disappear even if your significant other has cheated. Yes you will feel hurt and betrayed and you will be angry but those feelings come because you love the person who hurt you. Then again the one she/he cheated with is more anonymous so hating her/him comes more naturally.
Taking it out on the other guy….
Anothrrr sign of deep blue pill conditioning. Part of the FI programming is women never fuck around unless and men trick her into it. So is never hitting a girl and the pussy pass. Down deep most men known women do not have moral agency and dont hold women fully accountable. Most men won’t let that idea affect their thinking in any sort of overt way but it drives a lot of beta behaviour.
All of it is wrapped up into the cuckold white knighting for his cheating whore.
‘Earl, are you speaking from any kind of experience? You never reference any real life experience, but have lots of advice.’
Proverbs 7.
Why do I need to stick my hand in a bear trap to find out I shouldn’t stick my hand in a bear trap?
Ton is on to something with this: “Down deep most men known women do not have moral agency and dont hold women fully accountable.”
I think most women believe this as well. I’ve spoken to women who just can’t seem to get off the carousel because” ooohhhh that guy just does something to me”. Notice it’s always happening “to” them.
My own mother would lament ,every time crap hit the fan, “why is this always happening TO me” just before she pleaded for help from her sons. It seems she couldn’t get real with the fact that it was her bad decisions that put her in her current tribulation. She was really bad with money. She would give it away to whoever had some sob story, to the tune of thousands of dollars and never ask for it back and then wonder why she was is such debt trouble. Of course the people, relatives, would never even begin paying it back. They pissed me off when they took advantage of her like that. She actually cleared out a large portion of her retirement account to assist her married sister who was in “desperate” need of a large sum of money quickly.
My sister’s and mother’s marriages failed because their husband was [insert reason here] and had nothing to do with their own peccadilloes.
I have a brother whose marriage failed and at least he practiced some introspection and admitted he had something to do with the failure.
If there is any “manning up” to be done. Most women need to step up and take responsibility for their actions and desires that lead them to affairs and various contentions.
They need to at least admit they are the ones “acting” on their desires and not being acted upon in every circumstance.
‘They need to at least admit they are the ones “acting” on their desires and not being acted upon in every circumstance.’
The play the plausible deniability game so well it makes us think they have no moral agency. I think their’s is weaker than ours, which is why they need a strong man to lead them.
And you add to the fact we live in a society which tells women they are the victims no matter what, and we have this widespread mentality.
@earl
True, and this is why I’m so glad to be married to a person who has never shared this victim mentality. She has never once ,in our lengthy marriage, blamed anyone else for problems she encountered that were legitimately her fault.
She just takes the blame and fixes the problem. As a result she is very successful in her career path.
Funny thing is, I’m so used to her being who she is I tend to reflexively think all women are like her. Around the house we all talk crap around her and she isn’t fazed by it at all. So when my boys and I, a couple of my daughters as well, go out into the real world and talk in the same vein it’s a bit surprising to see women and men get upset when we talk.
My son was told by girl she could kill him with her Kung Fu skills and another one got screaming mad and stomped off when he was talking crap like we do at home. I was stunned.
Hell, one mother had to go running to a person of some authority to get my boys to shut up because they were so triggered by what I thought should have been seen as the obvious harmless crap talk it was.
So my boys learned something. Their own red pill moments.
“Proverbs 7.”
Exactly.
RPG:
“I don’t think most women realize how men feel when approaching or how difficult it can be.
“In the age of #metoo, it’s become downright dangerous. The ironic thing is the same people who pushed for total liberation of convention are now the same ones overreacting to every little thing.”
Well, I think both of these thoughts are true, and borderline profound.
Very, very few women know what it’s like to be nuked, and it takes a lot of ZFG (which we are *not* raised to embody) to laugh it off. And now, with this current PC mania for destroying men being ultra-cool, it *is* actually dangerous. In 90 days we’ve moved to a realm where “I was uncomfortable because he looked at me funny while he talked to me” is actionable.
At the risk of supporting a thesis with actual, observed experience, this is what happened to me yesterday. I am adjunct at the local university and I spend a lot of time there. I have a very modest windowless office in the “Quiet Area” of the library; it’s a closet without windows, basically, and I love it. A gaggle of college girls (9 in total) gathered outside it in lounge chairs and proceeded to shriek and laugh and read whatever text they were reading out loud. The sign notifying students that this is a quiet area was 20′ feet away, and they climbed the stairs to their nook right by it.
After an hour, of noise, I went out and asked them if they knew this was the “Quiet Area” of the library. On cue, one went Peak Nasty Woman and said, “Like we give a fuck what you think, some fucking guy.” The gaggle starts laughing uproariously. Look at the obsolete white guy get trashed! We are so NASTY!
So that’s how I got nuked. Not for approaching fat girls for their phone numbers, but for suggesting they take their party to another part of the library. The effect is the same, though. You’re standing there while a bunch of women point and shriek in amusement.
I need my university privileges because … personal reasons. So I’m looking at them. I used to fire people, male or female, on the spot for talking to anyone this way. Here, all one of them had to do was call campus security and claim some sort of sexual misconduct/malfeasance/discomfort/my panties are twisted because my butt is so large, and I would be banned from the campus because sexual harassment. And they know it, and they think it’s hilarious, and they are digging the power. I said, “OK.” I texted my friend the head librarian and she kicked them downstairs.
Note, I’m not talking about Grinnell or Carleton or Oberlin or any of the highly selective colleges in the midwest. Frankly, this is a pretty modest (in terms of collective IQ) place in the most conservative congressional district in the country; basically, if you can breathe, and write checks, the college will tell you you’re special and roll out the red carpet. But they’ve got the fever.
I didn’t think so, Earl. But thanks for owning up.
One reason reading Scripture is so helpful is that life experience is organized by its encomia. This broadens one’s understanding of Scripture, and reveals its many ambiguities.
It’s pretty arrogant (which is a sin; pride?) to assume you are a necessary beacon of Scriptural correctness, and that others lack your insights. The proscription against adultery is rather obvious in Christian thought. Gosh, I never would have remembered that without being so informed.
From a dialectical, or even intellectual, basis, your “why should I stick my hand in a bear trap?” comment is a red herring, albeit another self-righteous one that conflates ignorance with un-Biblical self-importance. Who advised you to practice adultery, and why is practicing adultery something you’re defending yourself from?
Congratulations for not putting your hand in a bear trap that doesn’t exist.
In the event of the guy beating up his wife’s lover, both men are beta pussies. The lover because he didn’t have the stones to confront the husband and tell him she was better off with him (i.e., the new guy), and then taking her away. The husband because he confronted the wrong human being (i.e., not the betraying wife).
“Why don’t you and him fight” must have made the wife feel grand, at least until she realized she was expected to live the rest of her life with someone she didn’t want to touch or talk to. Perhaps I should pull a Biblical reference to substantiate this ancient scenario, but I won’t.
There is actually a letter going around being signed by a bunch of actresses right now that the #MeToo movement has gone too far, and that it should be okay for men to hit on women:
https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2018/01/10/576986585/-metoo-movement-has-gone-too-far-catherine-deneuve-says
Not surprisingly it’s a lot of French actresses, because the French still know a thing about love, sex, and seduction apparently … unlike us Puritans here in the States lol
Earl, at least you have morals. Other commenters here cannot account for having those apparently.
‘I didn’t think so, Earl. But thanks for owning up.’
Well BV, why did you bring it up? We’re you trying to see if I went down the adultery path and found out that wasn’t a good idea? Then I would have as little sense as the guy who fell for the adulterous woman in Proverbs 7. It’s a no win question. Either I have no experience so you can say ‘self-righteous’ or I did and I’m just as big an idiot.
Do you have a story or life experience where an adultery case went swimmingly well for the couple?
‘The proscription against adultery is rather obvious in Christian thought. Gosh, I never would have remembered that without being so informed.’
You’d be amazed how many men don’t know that. Even some of them who call themselves Christians.
LOL Bloom. This wasn’t day game. This was a guy
–being polite
–smiling at a pretty woman as the most gentle of probes for sexual availability
–a precursor to a flirt
Or it was that a man you found attractive also found you attractive. Let’s face it, you found him attractive – if he weren’t attractive to you you would not have noticed it, tried to identify it as day game, or even remembered it. It would have grossed you out and you would have run home to take a shower to wash off the grossness.
Lol Deti I guess you would have had to see the look but yes precursor to a flirt or testing availability more than day game.
I would say he was attractive, but had he not been I think I would have noticed at the same (he was trying to be noticed) but I wouldn’t react w revulsion and coming home to take a shower. Maybe when I was younger, now I just take it as a compliment regardless.
“In the event of the guy beating up his wife’s lover, both men are beta pussies. The lover because he didn’t have the stones to confront the husband and tell him she was better off with him (i.e., the new guy), and then taking her away. The husband because he confronted the wrong human being (i.e., not the betraying wife).”
Meh. The lover didn’t have to confront the husband. Except to point out if the husband confronted him, that he didn’t do anything wrong to the husband – his wife did.
Which brings me to the second point. It’s not a man’s job to make sure another man’s wife keeps her marital vows. It’s the wife’s job to keep her own vows. Married women don’t sleep with other men unless they make a conscious decision to do so, and that decision isn’t on anyone else but her. When a wife has an extramarital affair with another man, it’s on the wife – she’s the one who took the vows. She’s the one who’s responsible to keep them. She’s the one who broke the promise. The husband’s quarrel is with his wife, not the man she broke the promises with.
Earl, at least you have morals. Other commenters here cannot account for having those apparently
……
Yeah ain’t we just blessed to have such paragon of virtues like you two around
Ton Law says women should be nothing but property
In a moral and just culture, a man is due compensation when a dude fucks up his property.
There should be some version of compensation for the cuckold, as determined by him.
The Bible tells us adultery is a capital offense so death for both offending parties seems appropriate to The Ton. On top of that her parents should forfeit the bride price and loose out on the dowery, but whatever combination of those sort of things the cuckold finds appropriate is fine by The Ton.
“I could only describe it as the way you would look at someone you love deeply.”
These types of things intrigue me. Let’s imagine this entire scenario was captured on video from the position of your eyes – from the moment he came into view until he left your view. Let’s show that video to 100 gals and 100 guys. (They do stuff like this in graduate studies research at universities.)
Then ask all 200 – using as many words as needed, describe a.) if something is happening here and, b) if “yes”, what is happening.
I’m guessing you would get many, many different answers.
I’ve spent some time with attribution theory. “This is what I see (can be true/false); this is what it means (can be true/false). Most of us are pretty good at the “this is what I see” part (although I couldn’t detect “the way you would look at someone you love deeply” on someone’s fae if my life depended on it). It’s the “this is what it means” part that trips most of us up. We tend to project our own thought process about what it means (attribution) onto what we see. And our own thought process are often not congruent with the thought process (if they exist) of what we are observing.
Interesting story you told.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attribution_(psychology)
@Richard agreed, I cannot know what he was thinking or feeling. for all I know he was daydreaming about his wife/gf! All I know is my perception of what happened. And it’s true, see how so many people can see perception so many ways? That’s another reason why #metoo replacing innocent until proven guilty in a court of law is so dangerous. Allegations, a mature diagnosis, and accusations are all too common these days.
LOL looks like loves deeply……
Love deeply = serious lust
Women WERE property of their husbands back in Proverbs 7.
That’s why the Bible warns that a husband will take revenge on the male lover… because even if it was her fault, he’s still messing with the husband’s property.
Regardless of both of them being “beta,” according to one man’s imagination… it’s still there biblically to warn the lover that the husband will take revenge, and rightfully so.
Granted the two would also usually be stoned to death as well. But the husband taking revenge on the lover is straight from the Bible.
BV, Deti & myself are talking about man shit. You don’t have the required plumbing to have a valid opinion on the topic.
I take the side of King Solomon’s opinion & God’s opinion… not mere men unless it’s my husband’s thoughts.
“You don’t have the required plumbing to have a valid opinion on the topic.”
LOL I’d expect to see that somewhere where women are not allowed to comment.
But apparently you arent a fan of Paul not permitting women to teach men etc all
Ton:
I respectfully disagree that the cucked husband should get to tune up the interloper. The husband’s remedy is to cut the cheating woman loose, with her leaving the marriage with what she brought in, forfeiting the marital property and custody of the children. A cheater like that has effectively abandoned her marriage and family, including her children, and is not fit to be part of them or to have any custody of them.
“It’s not a man’s job to make sure another man’s wife keeps her marital vows.”
Wrong. It’s always a man’s job to make the world better, not worse. It’s always a man’s job to avoid hurting children and families.
If my wife strays, her immoral behavior is on her. The man she strays with has harmed me and my children. That harm, which is substantial, is on him. If all that happens to him is that he gets a beating, he is fortunate indeed. Because the ass whipping isn’t nearly sufficient to pay for the harm he is responsible for.
The argument — that the other man didn’t make vows — is implicitly making an argument based on a contract theory of liability. Since he isn’t a party to the contract, he has no responsibility for her breach. But that argument fails to recognize that we are liable for our torts. And that responsibility arises out of our duty not to harm others. It’s not based in contract.
And of course, we recognize a tort claim for interference with contract. Regardless of whether the law continues to recognize a legal claim for alienation of affections, our moral code still does. Just as our moral code condemns adultery even if the law no longer seems to care.
Aint going to say you are wrong Deti. Certainly is the modern civilized way