Ladies, are you marriage minded? As in, your goal of dating is to find a suitable mate and to marry, or if you are already married to be so for life?
Sometime in the 1970’s the social contract on marriage changed. It went from something that everyone involved expected to be for the long haul to something people expected to do, “until we don’t feel it” or “As long as we’re happy.” People admit to walking down the aisle knowing they can divorce if things don’t “work out.” In essence, marriage has been reduced to little more than going steady, another stop in the serial monogamy journey. This is not being marriage minded!
At the same time young women were urged to put off marriage into her 30’s. The advice is likely based on knowing young women in their late teens to early 30’s have youth and beauty on her side. If she’s married, some argued, she might “miss out” on maximizing on those assets. In reality, pairing up is much like the game of musical chairs. Over time there are fewer options left, until there are no options at all except a few broken chairs. Many women who followed this advice found sure enough, finding a man interested in marriage in the 30’s is not as easy as it would have been younger. Such women often regret not being marriage minded younger.
And finally, if one is going to marry, she should have her head on straight first about what marriage is really about. It’s about building a life, a partnership, raising a family, leaving a legacy — not something that is based on feelz and being “in love” and “always happy” and “fulfilled” and all the rest. Not that marriage can’t have those things, but they are not the rock to build it on. Understand marriage is a long game, and not every day of it will be fun, fulfilling, and exciting. Lots of it will just be regular, uneventful, maybe even boring. Get that regular, uneventful, and maybe even boring is GOOD because that means things are going ok, there is no crisis, and that’s something to be thankful for!
What do you think? Please share in the comments!
What you are describing is hypergamy. It isn’t always about money or status. In some cases it’s HYPOgamy in which the woman intentionally goes down in order to get what she wants. I’ve seen both sides of this.
Then late in life when a woman has expended her currency she has nothing left to offer and still tries. Hooking up with betas, because feelz are feelz. I have seen this too. I have seen texts of women having affairs bragging at how great it is to be slut and
It’s the reason Red Pill was born. Men don’t like the rules, but we have learned to adapt in order to get what we want and to achieve our life’s mission. I’d argue that the majority of men are not in it for the harem, a few are, but there is much to be said about having one woman devoted to you. Yet there are few women who will do that, if any. Each of them have one foot out the door in some regard.
Hypergamy.
The result of this is the man will be on guard. Women come and women go. The mission is always there. Keep moving. Keep doing.
argh. I hit send too early. To continue the thought….
I have seen this too. I have seen texts of women having affairs bragging at how great it is to be slut and how they will teach their daughters to get it out before marriage. Then settle down. I am not talking one but three or four on a text message thread. It’s real.
Well, as a woman past 30, that was depressing…however, been married, had a child, now life is about me.
“People admit to walking down the aisle knowing they can divorce if things don’t “work out.” In essence, marriage has been reduced to little more than going steady, another stop in the serial monogamy journey.”
oookay, so why not just co-habitate and skip the possibility of divorce in the first place? A better deal for the guy at least…
“People admit to walking down the aisle knowing they can divorce if things don’t “work out.”
Then I’d see no point in getting married with that attitude. They either obviously don’t know what divorce does to a person…or don’t care what it would do to any children they conceive.
Not complicated at all, a guy just needs a tent and a couple of camels…no wedding required!
Genesis 24
63 Isaac went out in the evening to walk in the field; and looking up, he saw camels coming.
64 And Rebekah looked up, and when she saw Isaac, she slipped quickly from the camel,
65 and said to the servant, “Who is the man over there, walking in the field to meet us?” The servant said, “It is my master.” So she took her veil and covered herself.
66 And the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done.
67 Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent. He took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her.
being someone going through a vicious divorce right now, I can tell you that THEY DO KNOW what it does to a person. Hurting the man and getting everything they can from him, is the main goal. And in their mind the more they hurt him, the more likely he is to just give in.
oookay, so why not just co-habitate and skip the possibility of divorce in the first place? A better deal for the guy at least…
Which means no cash and prizes for her, so we can’t have that now can we?
What FML is going through is why I’ve been subtly ( for now ) hinting to my older son that marriage is not without real problems for the man.
Wish I had something better than “Sorry, you’re going through that.”, FML.
“Which means no cash and prizes for her, so we can’t have that now can we?” Well, yeah. I just keep thinking that perhaps legal marriage should betaken completely off the table and take away the lever of the law. Then the female(s) in question would have to be on their best behavior or be shown the door rather abruptly (sans cash & prizes).
FML,
Dude, it’s a bitch I know.. . you’ll get through it
Thanks, but no worries. It is my fault for ignoring all of the the red flags all those years ago. Even her brother tried warning me, but I was blinded by the gash.
what really does bother me is that even after seeing how dysfunctional his parents marriage was, the oldest boy who used to be my son, got married anyway last June.
But as that fuck took/added his wife’s last name to his. “Hers-His”, he was long lost to begin with.
I don’t even care about her getting almost everything. All it means is that she is stealing from the three kids.
I just wish it was over, so I could move on towards living rough…
Thanks, I know I Will. She is tied to all of her “stuff”, and all I care about is the dog I rescued from being put to death. we can live in the woods if need be, and I’d be happier than being stuck with her.
‘What FML is going through is why I’ve been subtly ( for now ) hinting to my older son that marriage is not without real problems for the man.’
It’s even in the Bible…
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+Corinthians+7%3A28&version=NABRE
“Thanks, I know I Will. She is tied to all of her “stuff”, and all I care about is the dog I rescued from being put to death. we can live in the woods if need be, and I’d be happier than being stuck with her.”
Totally get that part, FML. My ex-ho put who got the fucking cat in the divorce decree, I sure as hell wasn’t going to contest that custody Keep the dog, they don’t whine and bitch.
FML, just a side question. What do you do for a living?
I used to work for everyone’s uncle, and have been retired fora few years. Her “half” of my retirement will be around $50k. And all for never doing laundry or cleaning the house.
Indeed JustsGuy, wise words! Good to see you again too!
@chrissieb, sorry if that was depressing. Didn’t intend it to be! 🙂 every journey unfolds differently, this is “most of the tome.” advice.
I married young, for example, but did not have the right mindset. I regret that but all I have is the now and the future. And the chance to teach my daughters what I did not know myself.
Lol no worries. I married way too young as well. Did not have a realistic mindset at the time. Not sure if it will ever happen for me again. Personally I don’t think I’m the marrying type. I feel better about myself when single.
FML,
I am glad that drew the line at the dog. Terrence Popp was sleeping in his car and gave his up. The ex put him down. That was real cold because there were two young daughters who had to love the dog.
It sounds like she has been planning for a long time. Ouch.
Given that seventy percent of divorces are initiated by women, the problem of commitment is with women. Once kids are involved, it is lifetime.
“oookay, so why not just co-habitate and skip the possibility of divorce in the first place? A better deal for the guy at least…”
Sorry LarryG, that doesn’t work either because they will still get you for common law marriage.
@fuzzy, I just rescued the dog about a month ago, so long after this started. Yeah, I kinda saw this coming years ago, but was hoping we could work things out once our house was sold. guess what I saw as a cure, was her escape plan. lol
well maybe….
http://www.unmarried.org/common-law-marriage-fact-sheet/
States That Recognize Common Law Marriage
Only a few states recognize common law marriages, and each has specific stipulations as to what relationships are included:
Alabama
Colorado
District of Columbia
Georgia (if created before 1/1/97)
Idaho (if created before 1/1/96)
Iowa
Kansas
Montana
New Hampshire (for inheritance purposes only)
Ohio (if created before 10/10/91)
Oklahoma (possibly only if created before 11/1/98. Oklahoma’s laws and court decisions may be in conflict about whether common law marriages formed in that state after 11/1/98 will be recognized.)
Pennsylvania (if created before 1/1/05)
Rhode Island
South Carolina
Texas
Utah
FML, I can see why. You just liquidated the primary asset. In a way, that could be a good thing. It is a lot easier to split a bank account than a physical house. From what you said earlier, she may have a problem being on her own. Money is always a limiting factor.
I think it’s important to know yourself, know your partner and know how to do your part in making the partnership work well to both of your satisfaction well before you walk down the aisle.
Unfortunately I know very few people who that applies to.
@ ChrissieB, fair enough! Be sure you think longterm and self reliant — save for retirement and set yourself up well financially would be my advice… short term disability, long term disability, long term care insurance, think of it as hedged bets in case you find yourself unable to work or care for yourself, you are still cared for! I think as a single person many women overlook this stuff then panic later.
So true Ash, I think many people walk down the aisle w/o any clue about those things or that they are part of making things a success. So many just “hope for the best.” That’s like hoping you’ll win the lotto just in time to retire!
Already done!
“Understand marriage is a long game, and not every day of it will be fun, fulfilling, and exciting. Lots of it will just be regular, uneventful, maybe even boring.”
Then why give up being single or going steady or serial monogamy without “commiting.” Then you can be exciting or border as things go…
And be free to Do As You Please without leading someone on.
Wanna be selfish, fine. I’m a libertarian. Do what you want, just don’t harm another.
Best way to solve all this what is marriage bullshit?
Bring back at fault divorce. Gotta prove, show, admit actual abuse otherwise
“No divorce for you”
Then alimony, child support would benefit a truly injured party.
Then only the really committed would do it.
Common law marriage and cohabitation appear to be two different things. At least according to this state.
‘Unmarried couples living together have become more and more common. In Kansas it is no longer illegal for persons of the opposite sex to live together and share a sexual relationship without being married.
However, couples living together should be aware that although they avoid the legal obligations of marriage by doing so, they are also denied the legal protections of marriage. If you choose to live together without marrying, you should be sure that you understand your legal rights and obligations if you buy or sell property together, have children, sign a lease or a contract, or make other important commitments.
You should know that an agreement, either informal or written, that establishes your rights and responsibilities to each other, may not be legally enforceable. If you have questions, talk with a lawyer. ‘
Legal protections…for the woman.
No fault is really what killed marriage. Divorcing just because you are bored or don’t want to be a spouse anymore. Thanks for not getting what marriage is about.
Why mine works?
I have demonstrated I am 1,000% committed to either
It working and working on it continually
Or
nuke the thing to the ground including any assets so a cockroach couldn’t live.
Larry said
“I just keep thinking that perhaps legal marriage should betaken completely off the table and take away the lever of the law. Then the female(s) in question would have to be on their best behavior or be shown the door rather abruptly (sans cash & prizes).”
That is what more and more men are doing sans law.
Waaa why wont he commit….see above.
Men HAVE, not going to, maybe…HAVE adapted. Ask any under 25 male his view of common law or marriage. The die is cast. And womenz did it to their sisters.
Not themselves as the causal bitches got their turns and prizes. Its todays 20 somethings that will suffer.
“Statistically you will likely never marry as there is a derth of marriageable women out there.”
Can’t get cash and prizes if you never get married. Enjoy figuring out how to live on your own, ladies…or having daddy do all the heavy lifting til he dies.
Women killed the golden goose by going too far.
“Statistically you will likely never marry as there is a derth of marriageable women out there.” This is a good thing then. Females have said for year that men are not needed, so we finally believe them and walk away. Excellent actually. If I could accelerate the no-marriage culture, I would.
#1 The chick should be not fat.
#2 not a bitch
#3 understand where she stands in the smp/ mmp. Her assets and liabilities…. remember that argument darling? 😉
The rest of the list would be a long term play. If women want to get married they should work to ensure marriage isn’t the dumbest legal decision a man can make
To get back to the original post, while online dating, women’s time horizon was unbelievably short. I don’t think they were looking for boyfriend/girlfriend relationships. I think that women are just muddling through.
that’s great to say. but it’s not hard to fake until the hook is set.
LOL thats why I tell men to not take the bait
@LarryG I understand what you and the other guys are saying about a no marriage culture but while that’s good for men (and women, or some anyway) it is not good for future generations. W/o legal marriage the family is more precarious. I get that women choose that, women a generation back. But I still think for humanity as a whole it’s not good. Kinda like the kids today had no say in the debt they will inherit, they also had no say in all this. In both cases they pay far more than those who started it ever did or will. Sadly.
To be marriageable you have to bring value to his life (preferable more than sex) and show that you are a good long term bet.
They not only pay, but pay compounding interest. The cray cray is accelerating more by the decade. I worry about my kids, your kids, their kids… what an injustice those who changed all the rules did to them, in the name of “progress” and “modernizing.” They inherit smoking wreckage. 😦
@farm boy how would you define “add value?” Maybe you could give some examples?
RPG,
” I understand what you and the other guys are saying about a no marriage culture but while that’s good for men (and women, or some anyway) it is not good for future generations. W/o legal marriage the family is more precarious. I get that women choose that, women a generation back. But I still think for humanity as a whole it’s not good. ….
I think you are standing too close, RPG…in western society a no-marriage culture is inevitable I think, we are well past the point of no return.
But remember, there are other countries/societies that place a very high value on monogamous marriage and nuclear family. These cultures are thriving and increasing so IMO the next strong generations very well may not be westernized. I believe the concept of legal marriage is dying here but humanity will continue elsewhere in traditional forms.
And bring value may mean different things to different guys so really anyone can share specific examples. I think “bring value beyond sex” may not be specific or concrete enough for the female readers. Bring value how? What? Top 3-5 ways? That may translate better for female readers.
@larryg true, but don’t we all want OUR kin to be that, not just “someone?” Not to be clannish but isn’t that the goal? To be ok w you and yours and your ways disappearing, seems unnatural.
And also while it is far gone the silver lining is such changes can happen rather quickly. It may decay for decades then snap back in a rather short time. Usually motivated by what I just described – survival of you and yours and your ways.
In fact that’s the female imperative – survival. Currently feminism is being painted as the best path. The minute women (even 20%) think it’s more threat than good, women will shitcan that like yesterday’s news and run w whatever is more likely to lead to survival.
RPG,
“@larryg true, but don’t we all want OUR kin to be that, not just “someone?” Not to be clannish but isn’t that the goal? To be ok w you and yours and your ways disappearing, seems unnatural.”
I get your point of view, ok? What is so special about “our kin”, or our culture or our way of life? What makes this supposedly enlightened western way of life so noble? I am being very serious, RPG, not a trace of sarcasm or snarkiness in my questions.
This cultural destruction began decades ago when the women began rebelling in the 1960s, good or bad makes no difference now. This ship is sinking.
Oh Lord! “The minute women (even 20%) think it’s more threat than good, women will shitcan that like yesterday’s news and run w whatever is more likely to lead to survival.”
RPG, women here in the west have ALREADY blown up this culture, what you see now is just the pieces that are leftover from the detonation. No, like I said earlier, we have crossed the point of no return.
Nicley stated this! “women will shitcan that like yesterday’s news and run w whatever is more likely to lead to survival.”
I would suggest that women have already done so, shitcan the bad and stupid. Just not here. Feminism was weighted in the balance and found wanting.
I have my wife’s extended family in the Middle East and we stay in touch with them on a regular basis…Her 3 newly married nieces (all three are under 23 yo BTW AND VIRGINS on their wedding day) are all pregnant. They are satisfied to be SAHMs, depending and trusting their husbands to provide and care for the family. I can tell you this much, not a trace of the “single independent woman” is tolerated by the men.
In time they will have several more children each, not only will they survive, they will thrive.
ok, I’ll bite on RPG’s top 3-5 marriage tips … how does a woman bring value to a marriage. And first I’ll go on the sex topic because it should be a given … all wives should be open to sex when their husbands want it. Always. And … all the feminists will shriek …. AHHHHHH !!!! No that doesn’t mean ALWAYS … your hubby isn’t a rapist and won’t want to fuck you when your sick, etc, etc, etc. Women always play that game … no, men aren’t animals. But no bullshit. No lies, no games. When it comes to sex. If your man wants sex … its your job to be open to it. If you don’t want that … THEN DON”T GET MARRIED. And, yes, your man really wants to please you and hopes you enjoy it too. And, yes, he’s open to talking about it and trying new things.
As for the top 3-5 … just gonna wing it.
#1 Maintain your looks, stay presentable. Marriage is not an excuse to gain 50 lbs, look like a slob, act like a slob. Make an effort. Watch what you eat, exercise, dress presentable. Many, many times you see this after a couple of kids. 2 kids is not an excuse to throw your life away and live like a pig. Yes it gets harder the older you get. Yes you’ll get wrinkles and sag. Its normal and it happens to guys too. Your guy will get older too. Guess what ? If you stay presentable … he will greatly appreciate the effort … gray hair and all. MAKE AN EFFORT TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.
#2 Your kids do not come first. This is a huge reality kick to the teeth to all the fucked up in the head women these days. Reminds me of a discussion we had a church several years ago. A woman new to the church/Christianity … basically said … NOBODY COMES BETWEEN ME AND MY CHILDREN !!!! Some of the women took her aside and told her the following. God should be first in your life … not your kids. And then your husband is next. Your husband was around before your kids arrived and will be there for you after they are gone. So make him your priority not the kids. And next is you. If you’re a wreck and don’t take care of yourself … how are you going to be a role model for your children and take care of them the way you should ? Always thought that was pretty good advice. Ladies … your kids are #4 on the list. God, your husband, you, then kids. Learn that. If you think they are #1 … then you’re fucked up in the head. That alone probably explains what is wrong with our society … every woman in american needs to be told that.
#3 Be agreeable. Nobody wants to go thru life arguing about everything. Your husband has your best interests at heart … he really does or he wouldn’t have married you. So don’t fight him … even if you disagree with what he wants. It will work out … trust me. If it doesn’t … wait for a time where you can discuss it. That would be after the fact and before he does it again. You may not get your way, either. Communicate with your husband and express your opinions, put forward what you want as a suggestion. HE WILL CONSIDER THAT. And … even though he might not follow it the next time … if the next time doesn’t work out wither. Well, he will probably change it up … and try what you want. No man wants to fail in his leadership of his family … if what he is doing isn’t working … he will be open to trying it your way … if you discuss it with in in the right way. Nagging and bitching and complaining … IS NOT THE RIGHT WAY.
#4 Don’t act like a moron. Listen … your man is not going to be there for you 24×7 for the rest of your life. So … he’s got to be able to trust you to do the right thing when he’s gone. So be able to make decisions and make good ones. Take responsibility for stuff. If you have chores … make sure they get done. Ditto for children … be a MOTHER and not their friend. Force your kids to take responsibility too. Make them grow up. Life isn’t easy … spoiling them and giving them too much stuff … just ruins them. Telling them NO ! is not only ok … many times that is the best thing for you to do for them. When your hubby isn’t around … YOU ARE THE ADULT … SO ACT LIKE IT.
Just pulled these out of my butt … if I thought about it more … I could probably do better, lol.
RPG,
I can’t answer about the “wifely” traits, but it will be nice to see American women reject feminism. That will not happen till it is proven to be a detriment to the female imperative and there is an alternative at hand. At that point, it will go underground.
I hope that Larry G is wrong about a “no marriage” culture. While adults can work around that, kids can’t.
Still, it is going to be hard to get women to stop chasing bad boys and pining away after them.
Fuzzie, “I hope that Larry G is wrong about a “no marriage” culture. While adults can work around that, kids can’t.”
Maybe I should clarify a bit, I mean the state-sanctioned “legal” government recognized contract that is a fairly recent modern invention, THAT marriage. The marriage between a man and woman with the goal of producing a functioning, stable and peaceful environment to raise children in has not changed much in human history.
What did change was granting any government entity the power to “bless” the marriage for whatever reasons.
Kids need two parents, a father (male) and a mother (female), both present in their lives, regardless of the state sanctioned “marital” status of the parents. If this culture cannot or will not provide this basic family building block, others will and are.
The culture has done too good a job of wrecking marriage. It is what feminists set out to do. Still, kids need both parents.
Dunno Fuzzie about this; “The culture has done too good a job of wrecking marriage. It is what feminists set out to do.” I might disagree just a little, perhaps giving the feminists too much credit for far thinking and planning. Perhaps the destruction of legal marriage is an unintended consequence rather than a planned deliberate attack. Whatever. The marriage license is another tax, nothing more.
In support, I can see feminism as a death cult and the men responding by not taking the red pill, but going to the black. A day or two ago, I felt the same.
When the state got in the middle of marriage, that is when it all went crazy.
@larryg I know it seems so but trust me when the herd shifts, it’s does so quickly. We are imho right in the midst of that snap. That’s why stuff is so cray. Watch women go trad-con right quick. You heard it here first. It’s the new black. Feminism has already died, not bc the initial idea wasn’t sound but it just went way to far. Hillary was the canary in the coal mine. Sammiches and sahm’s ahrad.no kidding…. wait and see!
Sandwiches? Lettuce, tomato, and mayonnaise?
I could get used to that!
RPG, I hope that you are right.
I would agree the initial plan was not wreckage. It was both motivated by wealthy women needing single moms to leave their man who complained if they worked too much for the rich lady and neglected their own, and a separate effort to save the fringe who truly were oppressed and abused. So this became unsaid (your) men and children got in the way of rich ladies lives and this became said “all men are abusers, children will ruin your life, being a working girl is the way.” Being a working girl works until around 35, bc before then women don’t even see what they are giving up or may never have in exchange, so there was plausible deniability. Now, the truth is coming out — you can’t have it all. And it’s too late to go back. No do overs. And now you may be alone for 40+ years. But you never planned on that option. Many many women of my generation are gagging on this female version of the red pill. We are behind, most men of the same age did that 5 years+ ago.
What will happen? Who knows. Hopefully folks figure out they have been sold a bunch of bs but they can choose to not buy. Those who do will hopefully find others who feel the same. These folks will rebuild, have babies, carry on. That’s what folks do. Many will not but like Fuzzie said earlier, once it was down to 12 couples… surely we have more than that?
Me too Fuzzie. I am not ready for the black pill.
I don’t think it tastes like licorice.
My comment seems to be going over like a led balloon even though it was solicited. I’ll offer one more comment and then I’ll shut up for awhile … it goes back to that discussion several years ago at church. The discussion was about what is the role of a parent … according to Christianity and lots of people pointed to bible verses as examples … but what it boiled down to was this. Your job as a parent is to prepare your children to be successful members of society. To go out into the world. To get an education, a job and support yourself and your family. To marry and have children. To live a righteous life. If your kids achieve those things … then you were a good parent.
That’s your job as a parent. Its not your job to be their best friend. And kiss their ass and change their diapers till they are age 12. Its not to shelter them and fill their heads full of lies and delusions and cotton candy. Its to prepare them for the REAL WORLD. In other words … get your kids to grow the fuck up. And that means … not sheltering them. Let them get hurt. Let them get beat up, take a spill, have a fall, take chance and fail at it. No participation trophies; you sometimes win, you sometimes lose. That’s life. Oh … and did you teach them about God ? Did you teach them about respect. Did you demonstrate to them how healthy relationships work. How a man acts as a man. And how a woman acts as a woman. Did you show them how men and women can create a bond and work as a team. Did you teach them responsibility. How to work hard. How to do what is required … if you want to get something in return. How to set a goal and work towards it. And I could go on and on. Just basic stuff. How the world works and how to work in it. People understood this. It was just common sense. Not anymore.
The point is … in our current society … under Feminism and women ejecting fathers from their children’s lives and basically being a fucked up in the head … a shitty, horrible PARENT … women have ruined their children’s lives. Fucked them up. Destroyed them probably beyond repair. IT IS NOT YOUR JOB TO BE YOUR KIDS BEST FRIEND !!! ITS TO BE A PARENTAL INFLUENCE AND ROLE MODEL !!! Set some rules and enforce them. Tell them NO. Beat their ass if they act up … that they understand … when they are two years old … what they don’t understand is someone trying to be their best friend. You can’t reason with a 2 yr old but a good paddle on the rear end … works wonders.
And women fail at this; at being a good parent. Fail. Fail. Fail. For most single mothers … YOUR GRADE AS A PARENT IS AN “F”. From divorcing your child’s father to teaching your kid to be a dickless mangina soyboy retard who’s too fucked up in the head to ever have a successful relationship with a woman. Is your kid broke with student debt ? YOU GET AN F. Dead end job or no job at all ? YOU GET AN F. Is he unemployed, living in your basement, smoking weed, playing video games and hasn’t ever had a job or a girlfriend ? THEN YOU SHOULD BE SHOT FOR DESTROYING ANOTHER HUMAN BEINGS LIFE. Who gave you the right to fuck people up like that ? Do you think having a Vagina entitles you to be a monster ? Because that is what you are being … a monster ruining innocent children’s lives … to top it off … its YOUR OWN CHILDREN.
Jesus, shit like this just pisses me off. Ladies … wanna know who fucked things up ???? YOU DID. And while you were doing it. You blamed men. And hired law enforcement to put a gun to your man’s head … put a gun to your man’s head to PREVENT HIM FROM HELPING AND TRYING TO SET THINGS RIGHT … because you were hell bent on destroying everything. You stole his children, proceeded to fuck them up beyond repair, and forced him to watch … while he had a loaded gun to his temple and all that has to happen for him to have his brains blown out is for you to give the word. Fucked up … hell yeah it is.
Whatever. This will go over like a led balloon too. Because the answer is pretty simple. Women … change what you are doing. Men can’t do it for you.
Sorry but I don’t believe anything is going to change very quickly. It took decades for us to get here and it will take decades for it to return to normal. If it ever does, which I doubt. See … it would take women walking back most of the gains they’ve gotten over the last few decades. Divorce laws. Alimony. Child custody. Domestic violence. Favorable treatment in education and employment. Free shit from the government. Forced payments from men. Think women are going to give up that stuff ??? Nope, I don’t either.
I’m going to bed. Obviously in a shitty mood tonight. Sorry.
We are passed PSR
The under 25 crop now are the future. Period. Use 30+ dont count. We are an echo.
And the kid born in 1995 or later.
How many still have a father at home.
How many lived under a good marriage.
That and only that can possibly have a good view of marriage.
ALL the others LIVED marriage as bullshit and personnally suffered the damage of it failing.
Anyone wanna produce the numbers of 1995 marriages with kids still intact today as a percent of all parents?
25%? 35%? Maybe.
Is that enough to carry it on??
Nope. Its passed PSR. All we can do is hope to make whatever landfall is out there.
Humans will still reproduce. But the village or family seeing to their safety….quaint, nostalgic, passe, forgotten.
All of the manosphere, feminism, boomers, gen xyx
We dont matter. Our navel gazing dont matter.
Only the twenty somethings matter. They will live the future.
A future where they cannot unsee the last two decades
Period.
I hope that RPG has the right of it. Women have to see that following feminism is going to lead to misery and loneliness in their later years.
Well if we need to save marriage to save the wymenz, chillern and Western civilization women should get to work. Work on themselves in a fuck ton of areas, working to repeal the family court stuff, working to end the kangaroo courts on college campuses etc etc
None of which seems to be very high up on the typical girls to do list
“@larryg I know it seems so but trust me when the herd shifts, it’s does so quickly. We are imho right in the midst of that snap. That’s why stuff is so cray. Watch women go trad-con right quick. You heard it here first. It’s the new black. Feminism has already died, not bc the initial idea wasn’t sound but it just went way to far. ”
Ok, so say the herd does shift quickly. Not likely, but perhaps it could. It would take a huge force to drive the herd in a different direction, so what might that force be, RPG? Lack of legal marriage? Don’t think so. Men using women but not offering commitment? Nope. Individual females respond ONLY to circumstances where they can “improve” their status painlessly, as does the herd. Females have no reason to change direction IMO, individually or collectively, the herd has reached the cliff of destruction and is even now charging headlong over it.
Men were declared to be the enemy decades ago when war was waged by the idiot females on their own men, and we put up with it for awhile. It took awhile (a couple of generations so far) but we now believe you (collectively) that we are not needed. Now that you see the backs of men it is time for women to say “Oops, we fucked up royally. Please men come back?” No, I don’t think so. The Pyrrhic victory is all yours (women), you win.
Ton nailed it square just now:
“Well if we need to save marriage to save the wymenz, chillern and Western civilization women should get to work. Work on themselves in a fuck ton of areas, working to repeal the family court stuff, working to end the kangaroo courts on college campuses etc etc
None of which seems to be very high up on the typical girls to do list”
‘Women have to see that following feminism is going to lead to misery and loneliness in their later years.’
They already do see that…but rather than warn their fellow younger women of the misery and loneliness that awaits them…they double down on their pride and try to make more of the herd like them.
That’s another reason why they hate men…men have seen what it does to women long before they did and are trying to give them the advice that patriarchy and legit male authority is a good thing for them. They want women to live up to their potential and the feminists want to tear them down to their level.
One more question, then I have to get back to work. Why is it that females put such a high value on weddings (not long term marriage obviously)? Her DAY. It’s all about her, the spotlight is on the bride…LOL (hmmmm, tough question. Maybe attention whoring could be the possible answer?)….Here in western society the female half of the human species is so lost and confused, individually and collectively, but reject the very guiding hand they were given.
“Feminism has already died, not bc the initial idea wasn’t sound but it just went way to far” No feminism has not died, the cancer is spreading. And no, female rebellion was never a sound idea.
I think you nailed the list perfectly.
My Ex failed in all 4 of those. Add in financial mistakes, and it is a sure path to a failed relationship.
Because it is a display of the value she is worming her way in to. Showing off her trophy, as it were.
Once again, you nailed it. I have seen too many parents try to be their kids friend, and not be the role model they need.
What they don’t seem to understand, is that kids lose respect for them that way. Especially if the other parent actually behaves like a real parent.
‘Women always play that game … no, men aren’t animals. But no bullshit. No lies, no games. When it comes to sex. If your man wants sex … its your job to be open to it. If you don’t want that … THEN DON”T GET MARRIED.’
Cuckian pastors do that too…they think the husband wants sex all the time whenever he wants and that should be a no-no (even though the Scripture says that spouses shouldn’t deprive each other).
We get that if she has a legit health concern it’s not the best time.
Jeez, I’m still typing…..reality on the ground for the vast majority of women in my wife’s country.
They are brought up and trained to be wives and mothers starting as toddlers. It’s not unusual for daughter to “cook” something for dad at 4 or 5 years old. Motherhood is taught (and highly desired by the girls) by mothers and grandmothers, having children is not a curse or burden. Abortion is viewed with almost universal horror.
The women cover their hair (subject of much western mocking and ridicule, misunderstanding and downright hate) in public as a sign of RESPECT towards their husbands and towards God.
I think that what these defective and silly western females describe as “oppression” is actually viewed as security and honor by the wives and mothers there.
It’s why I always mock their term ‘oppression’…because the lifestyle they life is actually more oppressing than the living the life of a wife and mother.
Paraphrasing G.K. Chesterton here…but it was along the lines of ‘Feminists see submitting to your husband as oppression and submitting to your boss in your career as liberating.’
RPG asked “Bring value how? What? Top 3-5 ways?”
This is what I looked for:
1. A women that can be my best friend. FYI in my book a best friend does not play games in our association with each other. (i.e. no dating games or paying for date arguments or ‘that text was to soon’, etc.) They protect things that are valuable to me (i.e. money, equipment (sport or business), property and relationships). They share many mutual interests. They are there for me when I am going through ‘hell’. They pick me back up when I can’t get up myself. They give me sound advice and correct me when I’m off track. They do not ditch me when I ‘screw up’.
In short a best friend makes my life enjoyable and they are ‘there for me’.
2. A woman that has prepared herself to be a wife and mother. Meaning she has actually thought about this and can describe what kind of household she wants to run. For me this including someone who knew she wanted traditional gender roles. She will have thought about how many children she might want, how she will discipline them and what behavior she will allow to pass vs train them not to do it. She should have ideas on how will she teach the kids about finances, work and household skills. Will she expect them to to chores or just sit on the couch.
Being a parent doesn’t just happen. You should plan for it and prepare for it.
3. I need to find her attractive
That was my entire list when I was looking for a wife. Maybe someone else can get something from it.
This is a little realpolitik, but I think women should get married as soon as possible from a game theory perspective.
1. your body bounces back faster after childbirth no matter how heavy or skinny you are.
2. you can have more kids, which society still looks at approvingly.
3. if it doesn’t work out with your husband, you can cheat on him.
4. if a more attractive partner comes along, you can divorce your husband. Your family will be disappointed but ultimately okay with it if the new guy is genuinely better.
5. if you have a kid early enough, you can focus on your career later. Even if you have a small child late in your 30s, you have more experience with it, and the third or fourth kid is usually neglected a little.
6. if your career isn’t okay with you spending time with your kids, you’re better off realizing that when you’re 24, than when you’re 34 or 44. In this hypercompetitive world, there’s no competitive career you can ace in your 20s that will let you coast and have work life balance in your 30s or 40s (unless you’re an investor and accumulate passive investments). Better to learn that as soon as you can so you can change tracks.
I’m not saying a moral woman should think this, but the advantages and leverage is clearly there the sooner she gets married.
“. Feminism has already died,”
I wish that were true. I’m not seeing it, though. #metoo and #timesup still seems to be going pretty strong with no signs of fading out anytime soon. But dare to dream, Bloom.
If you think I’m joking, you might want to take a quick glance through here;
https://www.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/
I’ll agree with RPG’s “wait and see” approach.
Don’t get married boys; wait and see if divorce-rape laws are taken off the books.
Wait and see if women start acting like responsible adults and not spoiled brats.
Wait and see if Western Civ can survive without men doing the heavy lifting.
Wait and see, boys. Don’t get married. Wait and see.
And don’t be guilted into saving Western Civ, “Think of the children!” Women broke marriage, let women save Western Civ by fixing what they broke.
The exchange of rings at a wedding is symbolic. Her ring represents a queenly crown; his ring a slave collar ’round his neck. Until that changes, just wait and see.
This might keep some of the guys occupied for awhile…
https://www.rooshvforum.com/attachment.php?aid=8537
Fun reading!
What’s the definition of a bachelor?
It’s a guy who’s never made the same mistake ONCE.
– Cpl. Hicks
Men do NOT “think of the children”
It is not a tactic that works. Give it up.
THIS is whast men think of…the odds.
“So doing the math, if 50% of marriages end in divorce and 70% of divorces are imitated by women. Then I have a 35% chance of risking 50% of my current and future assets because she doesn’t like me anymore.”
A 1 in 3 chance.
And think of the children?
How do I know the kids are mine???
Mandatory paternity testing, no exceptions then maaaaaaaaybeeeee this argument works.
Not my circus, not my monkey.
I saw a video with Suzanne Vencker a while ago. In closing, she pointed out that the crazies were leading women and that sane women were elsewhere. Since it looks like men aren’t going to move this issue, we have to wait for the sane women to come back.
GLA,
I did not read any of it, but it looks amusing. Rub their noses in it.
Maybe someone read our thread from a while back about Prince Harry and Megan. It is official. The wedding has been cancelled.
Really Fuzzie? I didn’t see and need on that. There has been a lot of scuttle this week between past ex’s surfacing and her family drama.
*News not need
Where did you see that, fuzzie? I’ve read some articles about her dad’s health problems…and her half brother warning Harry to not marry her.
I mean if Harry goes through with it…expect that chaos vortex to increase a million percent.
I went back to google for confirmation. It’s not there, but I live in hope. That woman would be the ruin of Prince Harry.
Her brother advised Harry against it:
https://www.intouchweekly.com/posts/meghan-markle-brother-prince-harry-letter-159208
Possibly she’s been married TWICE?
https://www.nationalenquirer.com/photos/meghan-markle-prince-harry-wedding-divorce-scandals/
And appears 7 months pregnant in 2013 photos???
http://m.zimbio.com/photos/Meghan+Markle/Oliver+Cheshire/Stars+Global+Gift+Gala+London/1MbwnH6BJxF
Could of course all be tabloid stuff… who knows!
Ah Fuzzie,
“I went back to google for confirmation. It’s not there, but I live in hope. That woman would be the ruin of Prince Harry.” She is the true American Prize! He is just soooooo lucky to have convinced her to marry his butt…LOL!!!
oops…forgot to flip the Sarcasm Switch back to the OFF position…
A once (and possibly twice) divorced SJW since she was young whose parents divorced, she’s older than him, and had to go through the Weinstein initiation since she is a Hollywood actress.
I mean the possiblity of her as a spouse should have been DOA…but a lot of men, even high profile men…still don’t get it.
Lots of it will just be regular, uneventful, maybe even boring. Get that regular, uneventful, and maybe even boring is GOOD because that means things are going ok, there is no crisis, and that’s something to be thankful for!
this is SO important. people don’t know how to be bored … how to live in a state of no-crisis, of no excitement.
somehow we’ve determined that it’s bad for kids or anyone to be bored. when my girls would come to me and say they were bored, i would get so excited! i had a lot of things they could do to fill in that time of boredom … sweep, mop, clean the toilet. they got to where they found ways to entertain themselves, first … cause chores are only fun for so long 😉
my girls know the most amazing things. i’ll often ask them how they know something, and they’ll say, “I was bored, and I wondered about _____, so I looked it up.” and they’ll read and watch videos and develop an opinion. and they’ll create. they’re thinking. but most importantly … they’re not freaking out b/c they’re not being entertained. they’re content in the boring times of life.
so i’m really hoping that in the years to come, if/when they do marry and have children, that they will be content in the years and seasons of boring, of uneventful.