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commitment, dating, engaged, engagement, life advice, marriage, Megan Markle, Prince Harry, red pill, Royal wedding, wedding
All the news and such on the royal wedding has me thinking how easy it can be to get swept up in the event itself rather than what it’s really all about.
It’s not really about the dress, the flowers, the decor, the ceremony, the breaking or not of tradition, who is invited or not, who shows or not, etc.
I have often seen women get so caught up in the planning of the day that they lose sight it’s not the finish line, it’s actually the starting line.
The wedding day itself will last 24 hours at most, and in many cases the ceremony is 15 minutes or less.
What really matters is not the wedding but the attitude and mindset one approaches the entire situation with. It’s not about being a bride. It’s about becoming a wife.
Being a wife is about entering a whole new life phase. Doors closing and others opening. Building a life. Making a commitment. Sticking to it. Two becoming one.
Needless to say the choice of life mate is perhaps the most important one you will make in life. Not only choosing well and wisely, but also being a good and wise choice in return.
Of course there’s nothing wrong with enjoying the day but in the process be sure you don’t lose sight of the big picture.
What do you think? Please share in the comments!
Notes From a Red Pill Girl 
😉
question is though, based on Meghan’s history, how long until she is singing this tune raping Harry in divorce court?;
these kinds of things – all the swooning over the royal wedding – befuddle me. i was also shocked when so many were devastated to the point of serious depression when Princess Di was killed.
it’s a nice fairy tale … but as a friend of mine often says, ‘Fairy tales are for fairies.”
and a wedding ceremony is a blip in time; it doesn’t make a relationship.
it’s fun to have a party celebrating you, getting all dressed up and being on display, but that’s all it is if you’ve got nothing to back it up … if you haven’t chosen well …and if you’re not willing to do the work and make the investment necessary to last a lifetime.
idk – i never was one of those to put up posters of guys on my wall, either, or read tabloid mags. to me it was always just an image and not real.
– – –
her veil was beautiful.
i liked Kate’s dress better.
the kids are always the cutest!
@gla in her case(and actually most cases) even if she does she will be worse off, financially and status wise. Look at Fergie. She hopefully will nurture the good thing she’s got but time will tell.
Indeed Ame, if the wedding day is the best day and it’s downhill from there, that’s not a very viable strategy.
the wedding day should not be the destination!
Modern women don’t want to be married, or in a marriage. They spend most of their lives visualizing the wedding day, and not one second actually planning their marriage.
They want THEIR day, the ‘wedding day’ that is nothing more than a big party celebrating themselves. Princess for a Day, and all that rubbish. The man is just a prop, like the dress or the wedding cake.
There is a new post at Spawny’s
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2018/05/21/lyin-eyes-no-more/
love the grip his dad has on him:
ahhh!
Why did he marry a divorced American feminist? If he wants children he could have easily married an early 20’s woman. Like the comment at Dalrock forum said. “He went dumpster diving in an American trashbin.
‘Modern women don’t want to be married, or in a marriage.’
Glad I’m not the only one who sees this.
‘Why did he marry a divorced American feminist? ‘
I don’t know…why do many American guys seem to marry that type of woman? Are they gluttons for punishment or something?
I posted a link at Spawny that siad it will last 33-36(I think) months based on them both being shitty people
——-
Why did he marry her? Isn’t answer obvious? He’s a beta who doesn’t think he can pull better. Also pretty sure she is jewish so she ain’t american by any traditional sense of the word
@Ton:- Meghan went to a Catholic high school but identifies as protestant. Her mother is identified only as protestant while her father is identified as Episcopalian.
Meghan is a self-described protestant who went to a Catholic high school and was baptized into the Church of England a few weeks before her wedding.
Jewish???
Jewishness passes through the mother. Recently, reformed jews have begun accepting as jewish those children born to jewish fathers and non-jewish mothers. But this is not accepted in a large part of the jewish community. You think her black mother is a jewess?
———
One is traditionally American if born in America or if one has obtained American citizenship. Those two criteria apply to jews as well as non-jews.
All behavior is motivated. Harry lost his mother when she was 36 years old. Meghan is 36 years old. Maybe just coincidence. Or maybe Harry got his mother back. In any case, it is his life. I’m sure he will live it.
It does if you are a liberal RP.
My mistake, she married a jew
and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution
………
She is hardly likely to be any of them dudes posterity
I have seen estimates of the cost of this wedding at $33-40 million. I can’t help but think how much some of that could have gone toward causes the couple supports, toward doing good. Imagine what a statement that would have made, to forgo all the fancy wedding hoopla and donate that cash instead?
I have similar feelings as many here about the inner workings of this marriage but really doubt that the results will be a quick melt down or break up. This is the ultimate role, a reality show that never ends. The pay is great, the attention constant and (this is the important part) it’s REAL.
Actors are desperate for real. Claiming that your story is based on something true and that the character is/was a real person who went through real drama is a big step to getting a cast you might not otherwise have a chance at. The story of the princess who stopped being a princess and stormed off is pretty hard to sell and actors know a good story when they see it. It’s hard to be victimized by a prince unless the climax of the story is pretty bizarre. As long as he’s no worse than boring there’s little role for her in a break up saga … unless she can become as beloved as Diana and I doubt that.
Many couples in the royal family have lived separate lives from one and other, there are many precedents for eventually having it just for show if that’s how it works out. It seems to me that it’s the role of a lifetime and it can last a lifetime.
It’s very common for actresses to complain that they can’t get jobs after they lose their youth. That’s actually not all that true, the problem is more often caused by the lack of roles for women v. the number of roles for men.
A lot of the highest paid actresses are as old as the guys but this is only about those who go on to be stars. The ones who don’t tend to fall through the cracks at a certain age when they are too old to play young yet not old enough (or too youthful looking regardless of age) to play middle aged or old. This happens to youthful looking guys when they hit their forties too. They look great but too young looking to convincingly play middle aged yet you still can’t show them in close up without seeing the age. Anyway, she’s hitting this moment and she just landed a job that can last a lifetime. If she’s smart (no idea about that or if she’s stable enough to keep herself on track) she’ll take the job and run with it!
I ended up watching it yesterday when I was over at my parents house with all the kids and some other family there. They just had it on in the background – it wasn’t a “wedding watching party.” But honestly? I really liked watching it – so beautiful and just all of the history of Windsor.
We several items in our family from Windsor Castle, so it was a moment to teach history to my oldest of where that was, and how Victoria and Albert truly loved living there when they were married.
And oh my gosh it’s just glorious countryside beauty at Windsor.
Sorry guys! I’m a romantic at heart, and it was soooo romantic. But I really hope it lasts and that they love each other.
Agreed Alan, it’s a role that’s hard to top. I was also thinking that between the abundant resources and all the attention/adoration, that may be more than enough reason to stick it out. Even if the chemistry based attraction winds down. I think the toughest thing for her may be if the public favor shifts, as it did with Fergie. There’s a fine line between being the, “breath of fresh air” and going too far. I am not so sure she would handle criticism as well as kudos (who does?) so hopefully she sticks to giving the public what they want and doesn’t go too far trying to make a statement or push the envelope. It may be tempting to make it a platform but I think she’d be wiser to be the fashion plate and smiling face the people seem to want. Perhaps her lifelong desire to be famous and her need to be the center of attention has found its perfect match? Could be!
Personally I am an intensely private person. I can’t imagine a worse fate — prying cameras at every turn. No thanks! But hopefully it’s just right for her. And that she’s good to Harry and appreciates him!
@ Stephanie yes, perhaps a big wedding with all the pomp and circumstance is as much for the people and the country (celebrating history and tradition and England) as it is for the couple?
And as far as weddings go… the value in them and what not.
We actually eloped 😀 And we still see that courthouse whenever we’re near it as a romantic place!!
But then my husband’s parents really really pressured us to have a big glamorous wedding that they paid for. My parents had already kicked me out and didn’t attend because they didn’t approve of my husband… hence the eloping to begin with.
The wedding ended up being like a fairy tale, so I was grateful they did that. BUT it was just “one day” and definitely not anything to prepare you for real life after the wedding. But it’s still really sweet how beautiful and fairy-tale like weddings are.
But I’m a romantic. 😉
And just a thought… weddings *seem* to be more for other people in a way. I mean we were totally fine with eloping, but people (my friends, his family etc.) REALLY wanted the big wedding where they were able to be a part of it all with us.
They were offended when we told them we eloped. lol
So maybe sometimes couples just feel pressured to do the whole big wedding thing. And there were lots of older people there who were friends of his parents who we didn’t know and my husband had barely even met before. It was almost more of like an image thing I think. But still really nice toward us.
@ Stephanie agreed, I think there’s something to everyone in the two families and lives to “see” the wedding, witness the vows and the Union. Agreed. I have a friend who eloped in Vegas and while it was a smart move financially (they put the money that would have gone into a wedding toward a house instead) there was this feeling like they were still dating and nothing had really changed bc everybody didn’t “see” it. And agreed it’s romantic and happy, people like that too. A feel good moment! 🙂
I’m just soooo glad that circus is finally over..
According to U.K. wedding site Bridebook, the cost of security, including snipers, undercover police and a counter-UAV system, will be about $40.1 million, or 94 percent of the total wedding budget.
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/05/18/the-royal-wedding-may-cost-43-million-and-94-percent-of-that-is-for-security.html
Few here watched it. Bad timing.
It is Victoria Day (named after the Queens grandmother to celebrate her birthday)
Commonly known as the May 2-4. May 24 being the day in question. A play on words as a 24 is a case of beer.
Ah the May 2-4.
When city folk drive five hours in traffic to the cottage, leap off the dock in wild abandon….and realize the ice only came out last Tuesday.
When blackflies the size of beavers remind you the bugspray is at home under the counter.
When you remember that you forgot to bring home the blankets last fall, really what IS That?
When a brisk May morning without a furnace teaches you what +3 (41 f) really feels like.
The truest, most Canadian of holidays!
May 2-4 is always celebrated the monday closest too and before May 24th.
Coincidentally 4 weeks after the Maple Leafs inevitibly choke in the playoffs when “it was really gonna be their year!”
Go Habs!!
2-4. Twofour. A case of beer.
26er. small bottle of whisky (26 ounces)
40 pounder large bottle of whisky (40 ounces)
Double double. coffee with two sugar two cream
Regular coffee with one sugar one cream
Habs..L’Habitants…the Canadians, Montreal team …the arch nemesis of The Leafs!
LOL!
All hail The Optimist, Horseman! lol! 🙂
@RichardP wow! I would not have guessed security would be 94%! Yikes! But I suppose something like that could be a real target. (That part is the taxpayer funded part too!) Hopefully the event brought a lot of additional biz and revenue to the area in return to help offset that a bit. Wow!
If you google on “Revenue from the Royal Wedding” you can see that the expectation is for roughly $680 million in revenue. That more than offsets the 43 million dollar cost of the wedding.
@Ton: You said “It does if you are a liberal RP.”
I assume that sentence is in response to my statement “Those two criteria apply to jews as well as non-jews”
Otherwise, I don’t know what you mean.
At any rate, the 14th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution pretty much defines who is considered a “traditional American”:
All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside.
I have always presumed that the word “All” in that statement meant everybody. But maybe not?
‘Yikes! But I suppose something like that could be a real target.’
Honestly the biggest threat in that whole thing was the bride.
Whatever he did worked. She’s now the biggest star in the world. It’s a bit like Obamamania.
That’s good re $680 in expected revenue, hopefully the taxes generated by that will offset the security and are going into the “pot” where security comes out of.
Lol Earl, and that has only just begun! Hopefully she surprises us all and makes a smashing success of things.
C’mon RPG…I appreciate the optimism…but she’s been like this since she was a kid.
Outside of a very real come to Jesus moment…she’s going to do what she does. And the level of shock (at least around these parts) will be none.
named after the Queens grandmother to celebrate her birthday
To be totally correct, Victoria was her great grand mum
And people ask me why I wear a bodycam at work and don’t do inside work like install flatscreens except for trusted repeat customers.
This is Vixen’s future.
So smart to wear a bodycam.
Alan, I had wondered these things, too.
Read up on the congressional notes about the 14th.
Not to mention questions about it’s constitutionally about that ademendment given Southerns couldn’t vote
Not to mention original intent of the founder fathers vs the ademendment
OH.MY.GAWASH! Horseman, i just watched that video!
‘This is Vixen’s future.’
I wish or hope most women get how dishonorable a lifestyle that is for them. That they see through their flashy displays and the false happiness. Choosing that route is a route that ends in being alone.
And in Ytubes infinite wisdom it was in my recommended feed. Likely the algorithm matched to tradie a.k.a. handyman because I watch alot of The Handyman’s videos.
Even if single, there is no amount I could bill to mnake me work for them.
Just eeeeeeeeewwwww!
Horseman, that is gross. kinda feels like walking through sewage.
To make up for the skanks.
One of the best videos for a romantic song.
Everyone knows the version by America but actually Ian Thomas wrote and recorded it first then America covered it.
Ian says he wrote it in 5 minutes asnd it was given to him from above.
And love the scenes from Marty, a great practical love story that won Borgnine an Oscar.
Time for a new day. Forget those Aussie skanks
Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
Hmmm, think I got a shit test from the GF. Kinda weird, lol. Its only the second one I’ve gotten from her and it was a long and drawn out one. Ton ain’t gonna understand but the snow plow takes out her mailbox occasionally. Ton, its a real thing. And she lives across from a park and during the summer months it gets kinda crazy with the pool there and someone usually ends up backing up and knocking it over. So every few years someone runs over her mailbox and hubby fixes it and now there ain’t no hubby around …
A couple of weeks ago, she starts hitting me up on how the mailbox is down; and just wobbling there when she put it back up. Like I’m supposed to show up and fix it or something. Not asking me to fix it, mind you. LOL. AWALT. Just … its broke and needs to be fixed … she doesn’t know how to do it, of course, but doesn’t want to admit it, lol. So last week she gets a nasty gram from the postman, a note in her box … THIS IS THE US POSTAL SERVICE … YOUR MAILBOX IS BROKEN AND IF YOU DON”T FIX IT YOU”LL START GETTING FINED.
So, think she’d actually ask me to come fix her mailbox ? ALWALT. Hints, hints, and more hints. What … she thinks I’m her beta bitch boy ? I ain’t fixing her fucking mailbox. And therein lies the problem of course. I could do it. Would do it. If she actually asked. But she won’t. Instead its MANIPULATION and DECEPTION. AWALT. So fuck that.
But I gave in last weekend. This coming weekend we are going out of town together and if it doesn’t get fixed by then, they’ll start fining her and refusing to deliver the mail. So I took her the hardware store. Had her buy some concrete blocks, showed her how they could be used to prop up the mailbox. Bought them and put them in her trunk. And a can of spray paint. Looked for some flowers to go with it but she wanted to wait; fine, whatever.
Told her to get some dirt from the back yard, put it at the base of the mailbox and tamp it down with a rake. Then put the concrete blocks on the base of the mailbox to hold it in place. Spray paint them so they look cool. Then plant flowers in them to make them look nice.
She texted me a few minutes ago. Said she hadn’t spray painted the blocks yet … but she tried it out and think its going to work to hold the mailbox up. Really ? Really ? Ya think ?
And that is what men face. Fall for the deception and do what she wants ? And most men want to help the woman they love, so its easy to do. But do it … and you’re a beta bitch boy and over time … the more you help, the more she disrespects you and treats you like crap. But say no … say fix it yourself bitch ! And, yeah, that would probably get laid more in the short term but doesn’t help her or you … in the long term. So it puts men in a shitty, no win situation.
Guess I’m just bitching. Should feel lucky that in all the time we’ve been going out its only the 2nd shit test. Yeah, hard to believe.
Good advice Farm Boy! I wonder what he would have thought about social media? Lol
@mega just fix the mailbox would be my advice. I don’t think doing so makes you beta. If she’s been w someone who she couldn’t ask for help, it may be an old habit to hint than a s#it test but as a woman the way I see it is if you guys are exclusive and monogamy’s and you want it to proceed toward marriage (as you have said) being a man who is there for her may be better than her thinking maybe she needs to find someone who will. As messed up as that may seem, women may see it that way. This may seem very girlish but it’s like, “Are you going to be my man and take care of this small test or are you going to be a man who will let me down when the stakes are a lot higher than fines and missing mail?” Vs “are you going to be my bitc# or not?”
Maybe the guys will see it all different but if she’s good and true to you why not?
@mega: so she asks you and you say no. Big hit to her sense of self. Doesn’t want to take that chance. So – indirect stuff.
Indirect rather than direct seems to be a feature, not a but, with women.
bug, not but.
Farm Boy – i LOVE that! 🙂
@Ton: Folks now are living with what is, not with what was desired. And – for now – the 14th Ammendment is. But at least now I know the thinking that was behind your comment.
or … just flat out tell her …
you: “Your mailbox is broken. C you fix it yourself?”
her: “No. I don’t know how to.”
you: “If you want me to fix it for you, you need to ask me. Just say, ‘Mega, will you please fix my mailbox. I’ll make you a sammich and cookies if you do!'”
– wait for her to ask.
her: “Will you please fix my mailbox? I’ll make you a sammich and cookies!”
you: “Sure! And go put on that nice _____ while you serve me!”
now you have a very happy and delighted GF. you’ve given her permission to ask for help, taught her how to ask you for help, and you’ve graciously accepted her request for help … and you get benefits out of it, too 🙂 . she now knows you are a safe person for her and what you like her to do for you in return for helping her.
Mega… I routinely need help with things, it’s like I’m technology averse and have my head on backwards when it comes to “fixing” things.
I’m sorry women seem to hint at stuff… I try to just ask politely, but maybe she was never taught that’s what men want.
My suggestions, take it or leave it: let her know you need her to ASK you next time, tell her that the hinting bothers you – and all men. This is something she needs to “get.”
And my husband teases me whenever I need anything done or help with something… he ALWAYS reframes it in a sexual manner lol… like.. “Oh you need help with that? **evil grin** what will **I** get out of it if I help you?”
He makes it into an opportunity for flirting and more sex for him … of course! lol
Awww just read Ame’s response.
Yes… exactly that! And notice how she brings up the “what’s in it for him” kind of deal. I think all men should do that with women.
It works.
‘ So every few years someone runs over her mailbox and hubby fixes it and now there ain’t no hubby around …’
You’re the hubby now…at least in her mind.
But yeah if she asks directly there’s always a chance you say no. So it stays in hints or indirect. Any sort of rejection from a man for women is terrible. That’s why despite all the articles stating that women should make the first move when they like a guy…they never will.
Well RP once a man knows the truth of something , should he keep operating with the same set of lies everyone else does ?
I have a coworker who was talking about how his ex was shaming him for not doing his responsibility…
His response was ‘you divorced me, I’m not your husband anymore…ergo I’m not responsible for it anymore’.
I have to say it was quite a response. That’s something they never tell ladies what happens when they get bored with the marriage and want to go eat, pray, love with their lives.
Thanks girls … that’s some good advice. I’ll give it some thought …
@horseman just watched the tradie seduction video. I must be incredibly niave, I cannot even imagine acting like that! Vixen likely thinks like that but she’s at least smart enough not to brag about it like those two. Or at least not around me. They make her look modest, and that’s quite a feat!
Ton as usual nails the heart of it. Ame nails it from the woman side.
Its not fixing it or not fixing it. Its the s.t. itself. Read mega’s words: “. And therein lies the problem of course. I could do it. Would do it. If she actually asked. But she won’t. Instead its MANIPULATION and DECEPTION. AWALT. So fuck that.”
Thats the issue. Men love to help. Men hate being feeling used.
Everyone fell into the “operating with the same set of lies everyone else does” and analyzed the should he fix it?
The issue is for her to express what she needs, Ask rather than treat him as a mind reader at best or a bitchboy at worst.
Yes its a feature of women but men’s tolerence for it is wanning if not gone.
The “never say no” rule works both ways. Mrs needs something she asks and if I can its “yes.”. If she hints I ” didn’t hear it.”
Earl nails it too
His response was ‘you divorced me, I’m not your husband anymore…ergo I’m not responsible for it anymore’.
The courts say I have to pay you X or the children need X
Other than that You Do Not Exist!!!
As for big weddings … I’ve always been against them. Just seems so foolish to waste all that time, effort, money for something that is could be done quicker and easier. And it in no way changes the eventual outcome (divorce) … if anything it makes that outcome even more likely. Didn’t have a fancy wedding in my 1st marriage … if I marry the GF ain’t going to have one then either.
Since taking the RP, I’ve come to conclude to a huge, fancy wedding is nothing but a massive shit test. For the woman … how much does he love me ? And how much is he willing to spend in order to prove it ? Oh, guess that’s another thing I don’t like about them. For most young couples … they just plain don’t have the money for a fancy wedding … nothing like starting out a marriage spending a bunch of money you don’t have. Not a good precedent, if you know what I mean.
The heart of why s.t. are so hated?
The underlying implying that You Take Him For Granted.
Think of every s.t. you ever did. How can they not be taken that way?
This is how you do it. Try it yourself, then ask for help, then help with the task.
My kinda girl.
(But don’t mess with rounds that way, good way to get crushed.)
“Ya gotta know when to ask for help!”
6:50 in. (Then he and their two year old help, so cute.)
6:20
“And when all else fails, ask for help.”
mgtowhorseman;
“And when all else fails, ask for help.”
When I first met the lady who would later become my Mrs. she spoke not a single word of English; nada. Taught myself enough of her language to barely get by without insulting her or her family…then I taught her three things in English at first. “yes”, “no” and and “can you help me please?” Care to take a wild assed guess which of the three phrases was (and is still) her favorite?
her vocabulary has increased somewhat over the years, a high pitched shriek means “SPIDER! Husband must kill!”….low level curse in the kitchen means “Damn! I can’t reach the bowl on the top shelf. Need tall husband to reach it.”…..Giggle at 2am….
often times we get angry with people for not ‘getting it’ when we never explain what they’re supposed to ‘get’ and when we don’t explain exactly what we want.
you want her to ask directly and not hint around. tell her. teach her how to do it. then remind her when she doesn’t. if she keeps doing it her way, then she’s not teachable or receptive to you, and Next her. but give her a real chance first.
my first husband got mad at me all.the.time for not reading his mind. incensed. but if he would have just told me what he wanted and how he wanted it, then helped me when I forgot or didn’t apply it to a specific situation like he expected, I would have gladly complied. happy husband; happy wife 😉
– – –
fwiw – it’s why we girls love Ton so much – he tells us exactly what he expects, corrects us directly if we’re wrong, helps us figure it out if we don’t get it, and is patient when we’re genuinely trying to figure things out.
my Husband is great about this – and I wub him 🙂
“SPIDER! Husband must kill!”
LOLOL!!! it’s a GREAT husband who figures these super important things out 🙂
love that video, Horseman – and that boy is SOOO cute!!!
Here I thought it was because of my sunny dispofuckingsition
LOL! we love that, too, Ton 🙂
i’m not sure the mailbox thing is a shit test – I think it’s more a communication error.
however … IF she knows what you expect – to flat out ask your for help – and if she’s proven she understands that … and THEN she does the subtle hint thing, THAT’s a shit test.
not knowing what’s expected and therefore not doing what’s expected is not a shit test. it’s uninformed.
Planning for weddings can be fun, but I think we really need to encourage couples to put a lot of thought and consideration into their vows. That should be the most important part of the ceremony and what is given the most thought.