For the past few decades girls and women have been encouraged to put their needs first. I believe the initial intent was to help women overcome being a doormat. But rather than come to the middle, balancing her needs with the needs of others, it seems in many cases women today think mostly of their own needs and little to none about the needs of others.
For example, I often see this in relationships. A woman will be talking about how she needs X, Y, and Z. She can pinpoint to the smallest nuance everything that’s lacking, wrong, or could change to make the relationship better for herself. And while this is good, what I rarely hear is a woman pondering what her partner may need, want, think, or feel.
In my previous post we find such a woman. And it literally destroyed her relationship. She was so focused on her own experience, she completely lost sight of the fact that the relationship did not exist solely to fulfill her every need, want, and every happiness but rather it was about BOTH of their needs, wants, and happiness.
It’s true that in the past women were often encouraged to think about others and what they might do to make them happier. But I don’t believe this was done to teach women not to think about themselves at all, I believe it was done to counteract the tendency of the female mind to see the world from her point of view alone.
If you find yourself ruminating, perturbed, or upset — try stepping back from focusing on what you need, feel, want, or wish and ask yourself what others involved may need, feel, want, or wish as well.
Healthy functional relationships are two way streets. Everybody gets and everybody gives. Sure at times one side may be giving or getting more than the other at a specific moment, but overall it should even out.
Balance. It’s not (only) about you.
What do you think? Please share in the comments.
Notes From a Red Pill Girl 
Thanks Ame, I am trying to do my best! I kinda sound like a hot mess spelled out like that 😂 but trust me I’d much rather NOT have gone thru much of what I have but if I hadn’t maybe I would never have written all this trying to warn others — don’t drink the kool aid!
I’d much rather NOT have gone thru much of what I have
ditto.
but if I hadn’t maybe I would never have written all this trying to warn others — don’t drink the kool aid!
good for you. really.
it’s a gift, really, to be able to help others with what we’ve learned. it gives what we’ve gone through purpose, and we tend to need that as humans 🙂
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
i’ve told God, a time or two, that i think i’ve experienced enough to comfort enough people 😉 … not sure ‘my’ ideas for my life always line up with His, though 😉
Larry, to be a woman is to worry.
She’ll worry a lot less if she owned by a man with strong frame and high value, but she will also become addicted (so to speak) to that mental peace, that alpha cock and that alpha baby batter in her baby maker. Women alsp get super wet for men who are popular with women. Pre selction. She will worry about being replaced by some girl who is younger, hotter and tighter. Which in turn puts her on her best behavior.
Covert dread, her hamster is spinning to make sure you stay around vs spinning to drive put the icky beta
Always remember women are convoluted not complex
Ton “Always remember women are convoluted not complex”
This! Long slow clap.
Addendum
“Women are always afraid on some level.”
Even amidst safety and plenty they always fear.
Abandonment
Replacement
Rejection
Starvation
Predation
Because deep inside they find themselves lacking, they must rely on others.
And so a constant searching for reassurance.
Understand this and you understand women.
Boromir
“Do you have such little faith in your own people?
Yes there is weakness.
There is fraility.
But there is courage also.
And honour to be found in Men.
But you will not see it.”
Could be talking about most women.
Above our door is a simple plain piece of wood
In which I carved the motto of our House.
“We travel light.”
It sums up our House
Honour, Protection, Fellowship, Family.
It comes from this.
Not if we Hold True to Each Other