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battle of the sexes, break up, breakup, breakups, couples, dating, divorce, marriage, marriage counseling, red pill, relationship advice, relationship dynamics, relatonships, separation
Want a happy and successful relationship? One of the best ways to make it happen is to be a team player. View your mate and your partnership as your number one and the rest will fall into place.
Too often women today are encouraged to see their partner as some sort of enemy in a battle-of-the-sexes dynamic. Such a relationship is marked by power struggles, shit tests, and strife. The result is nobody’s happy or feels supported and the relationship flounders and often then fails as a result.
Compare that to the team model where instead of it being them against each other, it’s them against the world. Their efforts are directed at overcoming outside threats rather that on trying to overcome one another. It’s a much more harmonious and stable dynamic.
Perhaps the biggest key to achieving a team player attitude is to let go of striving for your individual needs in favor of the needs of the unit. For women, especially for women who have been raised to believe doing so will automatically lead to their oppression and victimization, it can be hard to do. And yet if the team comes second (or third or fourth) it’s not too difficult to see why that team may fail.
In fact, I can’t think of a single relationship in real life where the couple takes a team approach and one or both of the partners are individually worse off for it. Instead they are among the happiest people I know.
Two are stronger than one. And two pulling together in the same direction are certainly far ahead of two pulling in opposite directions. The first can overcome much while the second may hardly get anywhere at all.
What do you think? Please share in the comments!
Notes From a Red Pill Girl 
Good lesson. It’s not just a relationship, but a partnership. I wrote about how my guy moved with me after my mom passed away: http://damesthatknow.com/2017/01/23/taking-chances/
I will be doing the same when we move west in a couple years.
We’re partners, team mates, not opponents. I defend him a lot when my grandma gets down on him for not being a trad man or not doing things the way she thinks they need to be done. No one, not even blood can come in between or interfere.
unfortunately I think that you are more right thank you might know. instead of working towards the one goal of mutual success, it all seems to be a game of who can outdo who in what areas. I think that part of the problem may be in how being “equal” is portrayed and believed by people. It kinda fits with my previous comments on people focusing on the goals, instead of focusing on the results. If you spend all sorts of time trying to outdo the other, just how much mutual success can you really achieve. Women and men bring very different things to a mutually beneficial relationship. competition over nonsense isn’t one of them.
I suspect a lot of this stems from the idea that couples should be made up of people who have “things in common” … which is true but it WAY too often gets turned into “everything in common” or something of the sort. Couples are best when they are complimentary rather than identical. That was a slam dunk when sex roles and responsibilities were expected to be very different but today it’s often a mess.
Common values really trumps common interests when it comes to a couple succeeding. But feminism goes a long way toward crashing the whole common values aspect. That “my soul mate is the opposite sex version of me” idea feels pretty new (and very narcissistic), it seems like it really got going in the late sixties or so. Even if it was a good idea it’s never really true and it doesn’t account for individuals growing and changing.
“Any kingdom divided against itself is laid waste; and a house divided against itself falls.”
yes.
identify the enemy … it’s not your spouse.
I’ll ask the women here…
Who’s the enemy?
Satan.
For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Ephesians 6:12
Yup.
Fml
Great under rated movie with two superb actors, just ignore the hokey sets.
Bloom
Two words.
Participation
Trophy.
Yeah, my late wife had my back for 45 years. She truly despised the poison of feminism, you could get her angry but you really had to try ;-D
I know couples in real life who have failed or are failing just due to not getting this concept alone. Your spouse is not your enemy! But far too many seem to think so (and these are not violent, not abusive relationships I am thinking of. If anything they have few true (but many imagined) problems, ironically!)
“Yeah, my late wife had my back for 45 years. She truly despised the poison of feminism, you could get her angry but you really had to try ;-D”
^^So sweet! This should be the goal… to have a husband who looked back on your life and thought this way ❤
@FML that poster!!! lol
Throughout society at all levels all interactions today there is the Participation Trophy effect.
I just have to show up. I don’t have to contribute, I don’t have to sweat.
Its like the idea tech will save us, its an excuse to just show up and not sweat.
Someone has to plant the seed, someone has to weed, someone has to harvest.
Be it a relationship, a business, a community or the good old soil.
People have forgotten the joy of a dirty hands, a sweaty brow, and fruits of labour.
“two pulling together in the same direction are certainly far ahead of two pulling in opposite directions.”
It comes back to that joke of a woman saying “no” during sex, causing a guy to stop giving her the business. Then she looks back and says, “Why’d you stop?”
At the least its confusion, you said stop.
Practically it signals danger, is this a trap?
Regularly it triggers annoyance, make up your mind bitch!
Ultimately it creates defeat, lady you aint worth this, bye.
It’s depressing but these days, meaning being me being older and not as focused on sex as I once was, I look at whether a woman shows any signs of actually being practically useful in a relationship. This used to be a significant criteria just a generation prior to my time. People looked at a marriage as a survival unit, a business entity, a team, a method of living that led to prosperity … a family being a multi-generational prosperity mechanism. Though I’m open to many different interpretations of it, I have to say I haven’t met a woman in many years who seemed either willing or able to fit into any version of this role.
It’s confusing, women seem to want to be seen as more than sexual objects yet don’t seem to want to do much more than provide sex.
RPG,
I think Steven Covey covered this basic idea in his book ‘7 habits of highly effective people’. In the book he uses the terms dependent, independent and interdependent. Interdependent is what you are describing in your post.
From the way I remember it; interdependent is when two or more people who have already managed to become independent decide to work together to build something more than they could do alone. In essence, if a person want to make the most of their life they need to look for a person who they can build something in an interdependent relationship. There are many things you just can’t do alone.
Sorry had to be done.
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/newfoundland-labrador/dildo-craft-brewery-1.4724539
How do you name a beer brewed in Dildo? Tastefully, owners say.
Alan said “It’s confusing, women seem to want to be seen as more than sexual objects yet don’t seem to want to do much more than provide sex.”
Ding ding ding!! Winner!!
Not to pick on gofigure
“There are many things you just can’t do alone.”
Meaningful things?
Things you specifically need a woman for?
Things the guys can’t help with?
Things you specifically need a committed romantic relationship for?
Not being a dick. I agree.
But in most cases other than kids a romantic relationship can be replaced easily by a working, friends or temporary relationship.
All of which do not require you to be locked in.
So what are these things and are they worth both the loss of options and the bullshit that comes with them.
Every guy is asking this question. Womean better damn well answer it and loudly.
Other than kids, which are great if they happen but few guys are “I gotta have kids”, name me one thing that absolutely needs a woman in a long term committed relationship.
As Clooney says ” sell it to me.”
Interestingly I have asked this question many times and no one ever responded. Hmmm.
‘Other than kids, which are great if they happen but few guys are “I gotta have kids”, name me one thing that absolutely needs a woman in a long term committed relationship.’
Much like hypothetical movie…women probably couldn’t give you any rational explaination to marry. They more likely have to show it.
Thing about Clooney is…he’s married now.
And at least from what I’ve read about what his wife says about him…she adores him. If that’s true…perhaps that’s a hint.
So perhaps hypothetical lady in scripted Clooney movie didn’t really adore Bryan and he saw the writing on the wall and left. Hey I can’t help that makes ladies break down when they can’t see.
There is a new post at Spawny’s
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2018/06/28/re-imagining-star-wars/
Horseman,
A solid family/ raising kids is the only answer I got to: What do I need a woman for?
Of course a woman could be helpful in many other ways if she is willing.
Go figure. Agreed.
But to many modern men under 30 being a father and family man is not on the radar especially with cultural disrespect for it. But besides fatherhood….
Reason I ask is want vs need.
I need a job. I need help building the deck. I need a spot at the gym.
Even if I don’t want it, I need it.
Women need our resources for the most part.
Not want. Need.
As in essential for their comfortable survival until death at 80.
Still haven’t heard a reason for men to need women.
Otherwise you rely on want.
and the want can change on a whim.
Hey my banker adores me.
They are helpful and willing.
They need my deposit in such a small town.
But I dont need Them.
I can replace them with a dozen other institutions.
I can replace them with Nothing.
(A shotgun and strong box at home.)
I want them but another bank offers me a more attractive deal.
Gone.
What does a 25-35 year old guy; educated, has a job, has a home
Has the potential to support himself and others reliably for the next 50 years.
What do they NEED!
Cause mgtow’s popularity, plunging marriage rates, lower labour rates all show they do not need long term committed relationships.
My son, an apprentice making 40k at 25 and no debt has made it clear he does not want marriage. He has a girlfriend of three years, his third multi year relationship.
“It lasts until it doesn’t. I will get over it and have another one.”
He likes girls, he gets girls, he is not mgtow.
But he has no NEED to settle down and produce grandbabies!
All I got is “carrying on the family name!”
How do you counter serial monogamy? Let alone Mgtow?
I am a huge fan of marriage if its done right!!
I love my life. But me and the mrs are relics of different values.
(Teamwork, dont shit test, get funky with it…well duh)
I am being a dick for a reason.
I am just trying to slap the complacancy out of everyone
Cause “oh they just will” and magic vajayjay is obviously not working anymore.
Well if a person doesn’t want to get married nobody is forcing them to. Doesn’t make sense to me that a woman wastes her fertile and perky time with a man who doesn’t want to get married though…once they hit the wall there chances of getting married & access to a man with resources go way down.
Clooney did though…so obviously he’s a good actor in portraying someone who doesn’t.
Horseman,
I think you bring up great points. RPG directs this site toward women wanting to learn. It would be good for them to look at the harsh reality, you present, and realize that ‘having it all’ is not possible.
This post was about women appreciating, enjoying and building their relationships. It is good advice. Even if many women will not get the option during their lives because of the crazy world we live in. Feminism in not looking out for the individual woman. It is just teaching them where to incorrectly point fingers when the feminist agenda stabs them in the back.
So Ame is going to were a mask and act 60 yrs younger than she is when she gets 40 years older.
We all have to have dreams. 🙂
@mgtowhorseman
Per that clip you posted…Hahahahahaha. That was strangely satisfying, I wonder if the actress was REALLY acting.
Isn’t that how all women, who come to the realization that the man they were neglecting/abusing has had enough of their sh!t, react when they finally get dumped?
Men are the prize and women need to know this deep down in their souls.
goFigure – LOL! yep … we all have to have dreams! 🙂
cuteness overload!
excellent movie 👍