A big part of the red pill involves unraveling all the pretty little lies we are told about how things work and are versus how things really work and really are. Often this occurs when those pretty little lies fall apart.
For men it may look something like this: All their lives they have been told that if they are good, kind, respectful, generous, sensitive, and so on that girls will like that, they will find a good girl, and live happily ever after. “Be a modern male,” they are told. Often this does not work as described and such men either don’t find girls as attracted to them as “bad boy” types or he does marry, does all the “right” things, and his wife is unhaaaapy and divorces him.
For women, it looks a little different. Women are told things like education and career should be their focus. Put off marriage and children. Be independent and self reliant, even in a relationship or marriage. You can do, be, and have it all. There are no limits. Don’t “waste” your potential. Etc. “Be a modern woman.”
I am simplifying as there are many many more layers than this. And many girls and later women work very hard to be and do all that. And it can even seem to be working or work somewhat. Society reinforces and props up the ideas on many levels, furthering the illusion. Yet for many women, despite doing and being all that, life doesn’t work “better” as described. A gnawing uneasiness develops as the mid-30s approach. The cause is often misunderstood. It couldn’t be the pretty little lies!
So she may double down, thinking more independence, career, self-reliance, etc. is what is needed. Maybe a divorce, sudden career change, or move is how it materializes. “Change,” becomes the answer. Perhaps it works short term. But as the decades pass, the discord between how it was supposed to work and how it’s actually working grows.
For many women in their early 40s and above, you are here. (It may occur earlier or later depending on situations and circumstances.)
A choice. Double down again, or admit maybe they were wrong? Maybe you were wrong? There’s no going back, no do-over, just now. Maybe it’s time to start unraveling the pretty little lies? To reconstruct with what remains?
What do you think? Please share in the comments!
Notes From a Red Pill Girl 
Admit they were wrong? Nah, it’s easier to blame everyone else.
“crooked sperm”
How can you have a society where women see the bottom 95% of men as not good enough? Oh, and those same women bring nothing to the table but their vagina and debt.
Pretty little lie #1: Good-enough isn’t.
Pretty little lie #1 is needed in order to sell stuff. So it shows up everywhere. In the age of mass communications, no one can escape that message and its insidious aftermath.
Pretty little lie #2: I can do it all.
(devil’s advocate: yes, but why do it alll?)
For Bloom and Ame.
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2018/08/19/what-men-do-well/#comment-108537
For women it’s learning to be your own beta, do things that are not attractive or conducive to attracting men, and superficially discount 80% of men.
You are right. Those, however, are not little lies, they are big, big lies and their root is cultural. The way of life is not a recipe one could change some ingredients of. What you do everyday depends on the way you thinks globally. We need a radical change of vision. We need to rethink why we are and why we act the way we do. Even the ones who take a different path, might be a little better, are nonetheless within an environment that is hostile to them.
@Roger Blakely; it’s called, “street shitting India”. 🙂
I think it really comes down to not knowing yourself, and what would really make you happy. Too many people focus on “stuff”, and having a bigger pile of expensive things.
It’s not the answer.
But as the decades pass, the discord between how it was supposed to work and how it’s actually working grows.
i think this is the biggest truth b/c it covers everyone’s perception of a ‘greener’ yard somewhere else. i think there are probably a (very) few out there who can plan their lives and it all works the way they think it should? who get to that mid-life place and look around and think, “Yeah! This is exactly what I planned for, and I did it!”
certainly there are the lies that need to be called out.
but there’s also the lie that this only happened to me because i made stupid choices … when it really happens to everyone regardless of our choices – or at least to all women … that this is a season that you need to just put your head down and plow thru … where you need to keep your eyes focused where they belong and not compare your live to your perception of everyone else’s life.
sometimes life is hard due to our own choices, and sometimes it’s hard due to the choices of others … and sometimes, probably more often, it’s a combination of both.
sometimes our life is harder than others’ … often it’s harder than it wold have been if _____ … but, for most everyone, it’s hard.
you’re doing great, Bloom. this is a super hard season for you, but it is just that – a season. we’re all cheering for you! if there’s anything i can do, email me 🙂
“crooked sperm”
lol!
When my Ex had an ectopic pregnancy, she blamed me for it. She told everyone – her friends, her mom, OUR THREE KIDS, that it was my fault because i had crooked sperm.
She took an unfortunate and uncontrollable medical situation, and blamed ME for it.
i saw that which you posted in between picking up my husband from a several-day stay at the hospital 😦 … and taking another family member to get some labs drawn for body things (and those who’ve been around awhile know i HATE body things! they freak me out).
“The whole point of getting things done is knowing what to leave undone”
that … that sounds proactive rather than something that happens b/c we don’t have a choice, and i admit … in the last week and other times in my life, it wasn’t that i sat around and said, “Wow, my daughter’s fixing to end up in the ER twice within a few weeks time and be injected with some strong meds that will take awhile to get out of her system, so … hummm … what can I leave undone so I’ll be able to suddenly and unexpectedly take care of her?”
PLEASE do not take that negative, and it likely does sound tacky … but that’s a lot of how i read it.
like it’s a proactive choice.
rather than where my life often finds me … where it becomes something i do b/c i don’t have a choice … there are only so many hours and only so much energy, and i absolutely can NOT do it all.
so … i wondered if men have this ability to do this proactively rather than reactively?
OH.MY.GAWASH.
that is … i have no words.
she really did have … ummm … some issues.
i’m so sorry you had to go thru that. so very sorry. that’s … cruel. really, that’s evil.
Too many people focus on “stuff”, and having a bigger pile of expensive things.
i want Cill’s set up – where he locks away a few things then steam cleans his whole space! ahhh!!! can a mom of growing kids do that to a mini-van, too?!!! i always wanted something like that when my girls were growing up 🙂 🙂 🙂
You’ll like this then…
We went to marriage counseling back in 2002. During one session the counselor called her out on a few really serious things. Well in May 2017 the Ex told me that she had heard that the counselor had passed away. When i said that it was sad to hear, my Ex said, and i quote exactly “i’m glad that bitch is dead. She pressured me to stop trying to sell {longaberger} baskets to your employees, and that pissed me off.”
‘She took an unfortunate and uncontrollable medical situation, and blamed ME for it. ‘
Well yeah because of she had any brain cells in her head…she’d know what causes ectopic pregnancy. It ain’t the sperm.
Sounds like she may have a demon or two running around in there.
“For many women in their early 40s and above, you are here. (It may occur earlier or later depending on situations and circumstances.)
A choice. Double down again, or admit maybe they were wrong? Maybe you were wrong? There’s no going back, no do-over, just now. Maybe it’s time to start unraveling the pretty little lies? To reconstruct with what remains?”
By that time its over. No one cares what you think, what you do!
No one cares about you! Ever again!
Go Home!
Doesn’t matter how you got there.
If you are alone plus 40 you will be.
40+ female stranger?
Invisible!
To men, women, society.
It doesn’t matter what you do or think or feel now.
If they don’t already know you, they don’t even see you.
“I walk home every evening, thru the pyramids of light
To feed myself on silence, wash it down with empty night.”
FML – she … she has issues. that’s really cruel. she has a darkness in her soul.
mgtowhorseman
Oh, no. I don’t know where you live, but I live in Los Angeles. Here in LA women ride the cock carousel into their seventies. And their hypergamy only sharpens. I’ve never heard a woman say that she is going to lower her standards now that her sex market value is lower than it used to be. Oh, no. They say that they are even less likely to settle now that their children are grown. Now that they don’t need a man, they can be much more selective.
Yes, she has an evil streak. I don’t know why it got so bad.
But there were red flags that i ignored. If only i hadn’t…
yeah, she does ☹️
If there is an underlying truth here it’s that women are physically and mentally designed for change and men are designed to stay roughly the same. Women have to deal with puberty/fertility which comes on suddenly and dramatically, then pregnancy, then motherhood, then pregnancy, then motherhood (possibly several times), then menopause. Men basically have a puberty that sneaks up on them, and then they maintain a fairly steady state for 30 to 40 years, and then slowly decline.
Women are wired for: Change! New! Drama! Turmoil!
Men get: Yep, another day at the sausage factory …
Let a man pick wallpaper, if he’s really wound up he might pick alternating tan and white stripes. Ask a woman, she’ll pullout seven possibilities containing the most complicated multicolor mind bending patterns.
“Civilization” has been a 100,000 year process of slowly training men and women (and people of all sorts) to live together. It ebbs and flows and slowly, barely consciously, people take on patterns that allow them to live together. We are in an ebb period where we have decided to throw out everything that came before and try something new. The problem is mostly that we are not admitting what we are throwing out and we think we don’t have to be coherent about what we replace it with.
Yes, she has an evil streak. I don’t know why it got so bad.
But there were red flags that i ignored. If only i hadn’t…
i can see things like that looking back at before-wedding-first-husband. i wonder about that from time-to-time.
i also hear stories of people who had some red flags but straightened out over time and became incredible people.
so … in my little ol’ mind … i’ve had to conclude that we all have choices. i think my 1st husband had tons of opportunities to make different choices along the way that would have completely changed the trajectory of his life from that point. but, he didn’t. and in the end, it’s very tragic – that’s how my girls and i look at his life – a tragedy. and it’s sad – so i get how you feel sad about her. we feel that way about him, too.
so … i’ve told my girls to let it be a lesson … we’re all gonna do good and bad in this world, but live your life so the good far out-weighs the bad; leave a better legacy. leave lots and lots of good things to hold onto for those left behind who love you … b/c those who survive need those things. we just do.
There is a new post at Spawny’s
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2018/08/23/pencing/
FML,
Does she have a clue of what she is headed for being on her own?
Alan Kardec –
then pregnancy, then motherhood (possibly several times), thenPERI-TRAPPED.IN-MENO-HORMONE.HELL.PAUSE menopause.
there … fixed that for ya 😉
– – – – – – –
If there is an underlying truth here it’s that women are physically and mentally designed for change and men are designed to stay roughly the same. Women have to deal with puberty/fertility which comes on suddenly and dramatically, then pregnancy, then motherhood, then pregnancy, then motherhood (possibly several times), then menopause. Men basically have a puberty that sneaks up on them, and then they maintain a fairly steady state for 30 to 40 years, and then slowly decline.
Women are wired for: Change! New! Drama! Turmoil!
i agree with you – there’s some powerful truth in that. women needed to be flexible to change b/c they were designed to be under the rule and authority of their husbands, so they had to adapt to whatever he wanted at anytime. and also pregnancy, motherhood, pregnancy, motherhood –
actually … that’s very wise to separate out multiple pregnancies and motherhood b/c each pregnancy and child is different … and each additional child totally changes the dynamics of the home.
also … women needed to be able to run things when husband went to war – so when he’s home, he’s boss. when he’s gone, she’s boss, when he returns, he’s boss again. repeat.
my first husband traveled a lot all over the world – so he couldn’t come home at a drop even if he wanted to. there were lots of transitions. for example … if he was gone a night or two, there was one kind of transition for the kids … two-four nights, it was different, longer – it was different, again. it just is. so those are lots of different kinds of change that happen inside the home that wife manages.
my Oldest had seizures when she was a baby – the first one my husband was out-of-town, just across country, but he couldn’t get back. her second he was on a flight home from some other country somewhere. so all of those things i did alone. but once he was home, he was boss again.
anyway … i’ve thought of this a lot but not been able to articulate it before, however, you just did so perfectly – well, with that one, minor correction 😉
Females, human or even that poor whale we saw last week, not only have to be wired to get over the loss of a mate, but also children. In the long run they pack things away better than men do. Thus the dreaded hamster of RP fame. It’s a strength, but like any strength is can be used to bully.
The males, or at least human men, get the other end of the spectrum with their ability to compartmentalize.
A lot of that male compartmentalization vs female justification seems to contain a different interpretation of time. This might even relate to my wall paper analogy. Women, with a higher state of emotion (requiring justification or hampstering in the long run) seem to live in a state where time is more simultaneous, like many things (in the worst of circumstances EVERYTHING) are happening at once. Men tend to take one thing at a time and the more “male” they are (all men don’t have this power equally or under the same circumstances) the more time seems to slow under emotion or pressure.
There’s a lot to the way different people deal with time. It’s an idea I can’t totally comprehend yet but it goes really deep. Among women I have known well, the ones I got along best with, the ones who seemed to understand men well, tended toward accounting or dance. There’s some practice taking things one thing at a time in both and dance includes TONS of dividing space and time (a male trait) with great care and the compartmentalization of physical pain. Don’t ever expect a dancer to have sympathy if you stub your toe but she’ll share war stories with you if you tear a tendon!
Roger
The west coast of both countries is its own freaky microcosm of attention whores of both sexes.
I am talking about any medium to large town, city in the main stream. And not about how these women act but how the world acts towards them.
Again talking about strangers. Women you don’t know.
On the street. In a bar. Out shopping. In a job interview. A 45 year old woman is generally ignored, unseen. At best she is acknowledged but does anyone care, listen to her, look at her, give her attention?
Partially why the feminist shrill is getting louder. As they age out and start going invisible the “Look at me! LOOK!” Gets louder and more desperate.
It’s a strength, but like any strength is can be used to bully.
i find our greatest strengths are often also our greatest weaknesses.
When was the last time anyone went out of their way to have an interaction they didn’t have to have with an obviously 45+ menopause aged woman they didn’t know?
I am just observing what I see on the street.
Being 50+ myself I am more aware of people my age. I watch how people respond to the mrs. and her friends.
Lots of talk about what they want, what they write, what they protest.
But fill in the punchline “a 50 year old woman walks into….”
oh.my.gawash! i kind of giggled thru this b/c i’m either really great with time or really terrible. i tend to think i can do more than i can within a certain amount of time.
interesting about accountants and dancers.
Horseman – my first stark experience with this was when i was in my mid-to-late 30’s and was walking with my two little daughters and my teenage niece. some guys drove by in a car and whistled. i didn’t even pay attention to the car and didn’t know there were guys in the car, either. but when they whistled, my niece blushed … and i realized, “Oh, my! That’s not for me anymore!” i just giggled and moved on. wasn’t depressing … just … interesting, intriguing … first that i was *that* old … and second that my niece (who was like my own baby to me) was ALSO *that* old! lol!
My take is the world very much cares about women, their needs, wants, spending habits until 39.
Then their fertility, disposable income, usefulness as an employee all start to dwindle.
By 45 attention has drifted away. THEY care very much how they got there. THEY want to understand the pretty little lies. THEY want to know someone will save them.
BUT
To the world they are fading into irrelevence at best, invisibility at usual.
“Its over. Go hone. Go.”
Not saying its right, fair or even good for society. It just is.
Not even talking about smv.
As an employer, as a business owner, as a salesman.
A 45-50 year old single woman I don’t know in front of me.
Do I see
A well off consumer with lots of money to spend?
A target audience to make loyal to my business?
A eager, hard worker to hire?
A valuable set of skills to improve my company?
A political advocate to harness for my cause?
An attention getter to champion for me?
Or do I see them at all compared to the men (of any age under 65) and the young women under 40?
Again not judging, just relating the reality I see and this group IS a prime target of my handyman business largely because everyone else ignores them..
Much (ok all) of our talk is about situations where the woman has the man on the hook already. Dating, marriage, divorce.
No one talks of the woman alone.
The woman who has zero men in her life. None.
How does she get the man to notice her so she can tell him how fabulous she is and start the bullshit.
I am just calling out that she can’t.
Most people, men and women, do not see nor care to initiate with women they don’t know past a certain age (mileage will vary)
Vixen takes the left turn at Albuquerque and moves to Reno.
She knows not a soul.
Predict.
@ horseman vixen in Reno… I am sure she would do her best to bring some personal “disruptive technology” with her. But how effective that would be? I am not sure. She doesn’t really see it yet but the days of getting by on her looks and sexuality are waning. W/o other compensating factors? It’s going to be a rude awakening.
That said I do see women over 40 finding successful matches. But they are the ones who “get men” and have more to offer than sexuality and looks. They have looks + loyal sexuality + personality + savvy + demonstrated added value + few negative qualities.
A very pretty blonde 50ish gal I know (barely) whose lying cheating husband left her suddenly (she says) stopped by w a new beau the other day. Like her he’s above average for his age. But it’s long distance. She was asking, in front of him, hows my long distance thing going? I said great! She said but isn’t it hard? I said yes it’s hard but I just keep busy working my biz and don’t worry about the distance bc it is what it is and he’s worth waiting for. I swear that guy looked like he would have married me on the spot! Of course not interested bc I am taken and that’s her deal but the point of the story is — demonstrate that you are a woman who “gets it” and you are way ahead of the pack. If she’s pissing and moaning about the distance he will easily find someone closer or someone who sees he’s worth waiting for. Probably more easily than she bc while they are both (physically) 8s or better for their age, at 50 the advantages have flipped — he’s now got the pull she did in her 20s. She will either get this and act accordingly or act like she’s still in her 20s and wonder why he’s not as interested or not calling anymore…
@ Alan very keen insight there on the need for women to be able to roll w change, even work w and welcome change. Despite what the “gender is a social construct” folk say there are very different trajectories and priorities and pros and cons of each that the two have adapted to and/or are geared to deal with, cope with, work with than the other.
Not getting this is often where the disconnect happens. Either gender expecting the other to do, be, act, think like them “so it makes sense” has yet to truly swallow the red pill.
I don’t think so.
Nah, to some extent this true. Mother nature gives women an unearned gift between their teens and early 20’s, but then it slowly vanishes. My wife always gave other women hell for complaining, because they had their time and other girls now deserved their chance. Mind you, I always had husband glasses for her and most of the neighbourhood dearly loved her butter tarts at Christmas, so I suspect she did not completely vanish ;-D
@Bloom RPG said: … there are very different trajectories and priorities and pros and cons of each that the two have adapted to and/or are geared to deal with, cope with, work with than the other.
Part of the reason for this different adaptation is that one of the two can get pregnant. Not trying to be cheeky here, but the distinction is important: which is the one that gets pregnant – the gender, or the sex?
I think we can make a very good (and scientific) argument that the thing that drives the adaptation is the sex, the biology of the thing, the instruction set carried in the DNA. None of that is gender. Once we get past the fact that the word “gender” belongs to the field of language, as used today, gender is how one presents themselves to the world, regardless of their sex. And for that reason, gender IS a social construct. Case in point: there are cultures where it is quite natural for men to kiss each other as a form of public greeting. I think Ton would not be caught dead kissing another man. Those differences in behavior are not driven by the genetic code in the DNA but by the social requirements of the different cultures.
@Ame said: ““The whole point of getting things done is knowing what to leave undone” ” … in the last week and other times in my life, it wasn’t that i sat around and said … what can I leave undone so I’ll be able to suddenly and unexpectedly take care of her?” … like it’s a proactive choice … rather than where my life often finds me … where it becomes something i do b/c i don’t have a choice … there are only so many hours and only so much energy, and i absolutely can NOT do it all.
Annndddd … the comments I made at the link I provided upthread were intended to support what you’ve said in the quote above. In the What Men Do Well thread at Spawny’s Place you commented more than once about what you were leaving undone in your life because you just can’t do it all. You choose to minister to your family, which means leaving undone that trip to the island for a month and not giving your husband all he wants, etc. I was taking a broader view of the choices in front of you than you seem to be taking. I was looking at the things you said you have left undone and commenting that this (leaving them undone) is a good strategy for getting other things done. But, even then … we can’t do it all.
@ Richard good point I should have said sex as that’s really what I meant. 🙂
demonstrate that you are a woman who “gets it” and you are way ahead of the pack
Truer words have never been spoken.
My N is 11 including Dawn, but I’ve dated more women than I’ve actually slept with. Probably around 60 or so. Earl would probably call me a “Chad”, but no Chads quote Star Wars or play Warhammer. I’m also 5’3″ and have trouble building muscle or growing facial hair… that eliminates me from ever reaching Chad status.
Anyway, my ex-wife was hot, a solid 8, a 10 with makeup and the right bra…she pretended to “get it” the entire 7 months we dated. She acted sweet, submissive, feminine, not that good in bed, kinda selfish and only allowed certain positions but, hey… it’s still there. Less than 6 months after I put a ring on it, I was passed over for a promotion we’d both thought was in the bag. Within weeks the sex dried up like the fucking Sahara, the claws came out during arguments (of which there were many now), I couldn’t do anything right, nothing I said really mattered to her. She began to gaslight me to the point I kept a notepad in my glove box, just so I could write down what she said and know I wasn’t going crazy. Her weight went from 120 lbs to 200 in only a few months, claimed her overeating was depression related. Then she started with the physical abuse.
Like a frog in a pot of boiling water, it started small so I got used to it. A light push became a shove into the wall, a flick to the ear became a smack or punch to the head. Sometimes she’d scratch me with those long nails I’d initially found so fucking feminine and sexy, but were now used to cause pain. The last straw was when she tried to stab me after I dropped a plate and it shattered on the floor. A simple mistake, costing maybe $4 to replace… but she literally grabbed a knife from the dish drain and tried to kill me for it. I got it away from her, managed to push her out the door (she was 5’1″ but outweighed me by 50 lbs at that point), and called the cops. Fuckers arrested ME! Took me out of my own goddamn home, when I was the one being abused! Well that was a wake-up call.
Some buddies of mine came back with me the next day to get my stuff while my former “princess” was at work. One of them let me rent out his finished basement cheap so I could build up a deposit for a new place. Filed for divorce and the bitch didn’t even try to contest it. I had spent less than 3 years a married man but it was hell. Yeah, the Red Pill made a lot of sense the 6 years I lived by it. Some of it still does, it just isn’t usable with Dawn. So why did I date so many women after getting divorced? I honestly wanted to see if there were any women who could “get it” for long. The one good thing about modern bitches is they are quicker to drop the act now, especially when you tell them you’re over 40, rent an apartment, have no major finances, and you drive a 12 year old car. Feigned interest dries up quick if they saw you as a meal ticket instead of a person.
Men should still test women who supposedly “get it”. None of us can afford to be taken for a ride. It can cost us our sanity, our homes, our health, and our lives.
To stay more on topic, I see nothing wrong with any man or woman deciding parenthood and marriage aren’t for them. I got a vasectomy in my early 20s, that’s how sure I was I never wanted to be a dad. Some of my genetics are fucked (short, less testosterone, nearsighted, syndactyly on my left hand) and it wouldn’t be right to pass that shit on. If someone does it for other reasons, who am I to judge?
The thing is, fucking OWN IT. Acknowledge that this is a choice you made. Don’t blame men for “making” you a career woman. Don’t point the finger at men for “forcing” you to wait to marry. Don’t whine that “the patriarchy” is working to prevent you from becoming a mother. It’s your decision to do or do not.
@Clark
Have not seen you comment before on Bloom’s little blog but you have interesting insights. Seems that you ex was a typical devolved modern western female. You have my sympathies.
Long ago, in the Dark Ages (pre-personal computers and internet) I perfected the art of completely cutting people out of my life who were or became unworthy. The process was not unlike flushing a large fresh turd down the toilet. My ex, ex’s rabid family, my biological and quite bat-shit crazy sister and a co-worker who pulled the typical feminist wounded woman skit. All flushed.
I personally have no reason to tolerate these turds taking up space in my life. Best to just wipe your ass and move on
Richard …
proof i always get caught in the ‘can’t see the forest for the trees’ 🙂
my brain had gone in a totally different direction *rolling my eyes at myself* 🙂
Clark … that is … wow. my mind can’t even go there. i do not understand women like that and don’t want to.
Larry – i think you’re having too much fun with these analogies on a women’s site 😉
‘The thing is, fucking OWN IT. Acknowledge that this is a choice you made. Don’t blame men for “making” you a career woman. Don’t point the finger at men for “forcing” you to wait to marry. Don’t whine that “the patriarchy” is working to prevent you from becoming a mother. It’s your decision to do or do not.’
Yup…that’s what I’ve been saying too. It’s the lack of ownership and responsibility along with blaming men in general that drives me up a wall.
“The thing is, fucking OWN IT. Acknowledge that this is a choice you made. Don’t blame men for “making” you a career woman. Don’t point the finger at men for “forcing” you to wait to marry. Don’t whine that “the patriarchy” is working to prevent you from becoming a mother. It’s your decision to do or do not.”
This is a good point women often blame men for these things rather than realize or admit they made these choices themselves. Maybe based on pretty little lies but still their own choices.
Ame,
Believe me, it’s a very good thing you can’t relate to those women. It’s the one reason I know NAWALT. If you really were all like that, our species would have died long ago.
Exactly, Earl.
I have a massive amount of sympathy for people who have actually been put into bad situations without their consent/through no fault of their own. Fate is not always kind, regardless of your sex or gender. Life sucks for a lot of men and women.
But don’t bitch and complain when you could’ve done something about it.
@Clark said: But don’t bitch and complain when you could’ve done something about it.
Learned Helplessness and perceived loss of control (or very real never-had-control-to-start- with) are very real conditions. And the concepts involved in those conditions are very much related to the concepts involved in the Blue Pill / Red Pill dichotomy. One can only make personal choices based on what they perceive to be true. And if what said person has been presented with is Blue Pill / untrue stuff, how can said person make better choices? When said person is only exposed to information that says they are no good and are incompetent, learned helplessness easily takes over. Genuine Red Pill thinking (based on what does the research say about all of this?) understands that we cannot legitimately criticize a person for the choices they make when they do not understand that other choices are available. Dawn’s story about escaping to her aunt(?) and devouring the information she found there – information that presented a different reality to her, which helped her make different choices – is a case in point.
Clark – I assume you know that the Blue Pill / Red Pill comes from the movie The Matrix. Blue Pill means you still believe that what you have been told is true. Red Pill means that you have been presented with what is really true and you accept it and base future decisions and choices on this “new” truth.
In the context of the initial definition of Blue Pill / Red Pill, you would no longer be Red Pill only if you have decided to re-embrace what you have learned to be the falsehoods of the truth you were previously presented with. I seriously doubt that you have done that, and so doubt that you have given up on being Red Pill. What you’ve given up on are the attitudes expressed by many in the manosphere.
Swallowing the Red Pill (acting on what you’ve discovered to actually be true), and posturing and bloviating as some “red pill” men do in the manosphere, are two completely different issues. I think you will discover a much-reduced amount of bloviating her and at Spawny’s.
“here”, not her. Although … it could be her.