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Yesterday I ran into a colleague for the first time since I heard he and his wife were divorcing. (Click on the link for the backstory.)
He summed it up simply. “I am happier,” he said. Even in a small apartment with next to nothing, he’s happier. And I don’t doubt it. His ex is one of those bitter, unhaaaaapy, always complaining types.
As other men have described it before, after years of trying, years of counseling, years of wanting things to work despite years of her nonsense, one day over a relatively small incident he suddenly just didn’t care anymore. He was done. No looking back. He said he just knew at that moment it was never going to work.
Currently he is supporting her and his son in the house while paying for the apartment as well. He says she wants to keep both her small house she had when they married (a paid off rental) and then the house he had bought shortly before they married too. She wants it all, but has no job and no job skills that would allow her to afford it. He’s already been told she won’t qualify for spousal support. The divorce proceedings are underway and soon I have a feeling that she’s going to be very unhappy when reality hits and she’s living on much reduced means.
I also have a feeling it’s going to be a really harsh reality to swallow when she realizes all the problems she blamed him for are still there. Combined with new problems, like having to move, having to live on much less, having to work, etc.
Meanwhile, he’s happier. He’s living a simple life, and is fine with it. He’ll still go to work and all the rest like before, except instead of coming home to strife he now comes home to peace. Another MGTOW is born.
What do you think? Please share in the comments.
Notes From a Red Pill Girl 
Want to hear a real pecker-wrecker hard-on killer? Went to the doctor office this afternoon for a persistent rash on my back that will not take a fucking hint and leave the premises. Doctor was “concerned” and took a healthy sample to have a lab take a look (which I have to pay for of course).
I am not amused.
Just watched the video, Larry (my satellite internet is kind of off and on, takes a while to download video sometimes).
Looks like a DREAM assignment!
Sorry about the rash 😦
Larry.
The neighbors house down the beach. Asked 350 got under 300. Very cheap.
And under 2 hours to Miami on Delta.
Ames
I am glad to read your last comment. Sounds like you do appreciate what you have. You had me worried there.
🙂
i think it was Cill who commented once that he doesn’t think about all this stuff except when at Spawny’s. otherwise, he’s living his life.
and that’s mostly true for me. most of the time i’m living life, in the present, loving and enjoying the man i have and our young adult kids.
but … there’s some truths that must be faced, imo …
~ like … those who ignore the past and don’t learn from it are doomed to repeat it. if i don’t learn from it and teach the truths i’ve learned to my daughters, and any other women who are willing to learn, then i’m perpetuating culture repeating this insanity. it’s the same, imo, as BV and Ton and others of you men out there helping other men figure this stuff out.
~ like … personal experience is a great teacher. my first husband went back to get his MBA after working about five years. he had a marketing prof who had never worked ONE single day outside academia. my husband aced the class b/c he was good at regurgitating stupid information … knowing all along the info being taught was bs. why? b/c he had no personal experience.
i have, (sadly sometimes) a lot of personal experience that i’ve learned from – or at least i hope i have 🙂 … what does it say of me if i hoard that info and do not, in the very least, teach it to my daughters?
~ our past always affects our future. my Man and i do discuss these things from time-to-time because we have three young adult kids between us – these are big topics. we would be terribly ineffective and stupid to ignore both of our pasts and simply live only in the present.
~ and interestingly enough … this topic has come up in several different areas of my life lately … i always find it amusing when things like this happen.
– – –
curious … do i sense a perception that how i present this indicates i’m disrespecting my Husband that i’m married to now in some way?
i can see that. but what is important to know … which is important out here b/c it validates y’all steering clear of middle-aged women as a whole – is that those women are still expecting you to fulfill unrealistic desires in them b/c they still have those same desires they did when they were young … and they think that all the years lived don’t matter.
the reality is all our years lived matter, and they all show up in the future somewhere in some form, even if it’s no longer visible b/c it changed the way we were thinking at the time and we no longer even give cognitive thought to before and after ways of thinking.
a little thing … is it wrong to tell my daughters their birth stories b/c my husband, whom i married to now, wasn’t there then? and isn’t their dad? that’s a part of our past i never want to forget – and their Dad was amazing during both their births. there are lots of good memories.
what i share out here, though, is the hard stuff. the stuff no one wants to acknowledge. it’s stuff i’ve dealt with, accepted, and moved on from. but it’s still real. and a lot of women, most, actually, still look at women like me and think, “It’s not fair for you to call other women out on getting a divorce so they can get a better man when YOU NOW HAVE A BETTER MAN!” what they’re saying is that my divorce gave me a free ticket to a better life. what they do NOT want to know is the cost … they do NOT want to know that that fairy tale dream (cue Julia Roberts here) does NOT exist, ESPECIALLY, when starting later in life because there are some things that can ONLY be experienced in youth.
how do i know this?
because i’ve lived it.
it’s not book knowledge.
it’s real, learned from real life, often painful, experience.
it’s real, and i’ve chosen to face these hard facts of reality, deal with them, accept them, and move on doing the best i can with what i’ve got and giving my Man all i have and can give him … which, and this is what no one wants to hear or know … is NOT as much as i could have had we begun in our youth.
that’s … just reality.
in our marriage … we’ve faced it and dealt with it and accepted it. and we choose not to let it control us. we choose to release the control it has over us. i choose to release the control it has over me.
and by accepting it and dealing with it and moving on, i can share these things and teach them because i now have control over all of it.
… and … when i get outa line … my wonderful Husband has many effective ways to pull me back in 😉 🙂 🙂 … line, that is … and, well … i’ll just stop while i’m ahead here 😉
lol Larry! that’s funnee 🙂
thanks for calling me out on it … b/c if i am ever disrespecting my husband, i need to be 😉
well, Larry … docs are your fav kind of people! lol!
so sorry. that sucks 😦
Ames gets the bravery award for the thread for being so honest with us and herself!
Aren’t my ponies cute all lined up like bookends! Sound asleep!
ahhh, thanks, Horseman 🙂
that means a lot to me.
i’ve been wondering for some time how to articulate all of this without it sounding disrespectful towards my Husband now (or even my first husband) … and without it sounding like i do not value or appreciate (deeply) what i have now.
it’s hard to face, but feminism and stupid choices have made this slap-in-you-face evident everywhere, but no one’s telling it how it really is.
or at least no one i know 😉 … should have classified that b/c my world gets pretty small a lot of the time (and i like it that way, btw 😉 )
yeah .. 1964 … when you have to keep scrolling, and scrolling and scrolling and scrolling to get to your birth year on stupid electronic data entry thingies! 😉
*things.that.make.me.feel.really.old!*
Roger Blakely MGTOW
Ame, one of the things that I am learning is that people with borderline personality disorder can fake it for decades. The entire relationship with them is an illusion. It can be an elaborate and long-lasting illusion but an illusion all the same.
that’s interesting, Roger. i’ve not studied borderline PD.
he also had addiction issues. he would live in this alternate reality parallel to real life, so the two could never mix. i would often ask him what i could do different, better, change, anything … i was willing to do anything. and he’d simply answer, “It’s not about you.”
till the end … then it was all about me, and i was responsible for every tiny thing he didn’t want to take responsibility for. 😦
i wonder if some of that was BPD. i was told by one of my daughter’s specialists that he was probably undiagnosed bipolar.
i try to remember mostly the good times … my girls and joke kindly about his dark side (things like, ‘Ohhh, good thing Daddy didin’t see *that*! He’d be *really* angry! … soft giggle, move on.
sometimes it’s important to share these things with certain people – like med professionals who are working w/my kids b/c they need to know their history, and their med history is extremely influenced by the things he did to them.
otherwise … it’s just a way of life. he’ll always be their dad, he’ll always be a part of who we are and how we lived … it just is.
– – –
I said that she could have any man that she wanted if she would just email them.
i honestly would not have thought to do that if y’all out here had not spoken to it. it just would not have entered my mind that it would be okay for me to do so. idk what that says about me … just being honest 😉
she should have replied, “Really?! Cool! Thanks for the advice! I’ll do that!” stupid woman.
– – –
She never came back to church. … She never came back to church either.
that’s pretty telling … in a tragic sort of way.
– – –
Not only do these women not have anything to offer, they don’t even aspire to have anything to offer.
i see that. and they expect some man to come in and fix everything for them after they’ve screwed it up all their lives. 😦 … boo.
even myself, though … i’ve made some pretty good choices in my life, me thinks, over all. nothing strikingly bad or intentionally stupid. but i’ve told my Husband he needs to hang on in this life for a good long time b/c he’s definitely my last! it’s a lot of work adapting to a different man at mid-life. when we’re young it just happens as we grow up together. mid-life, though … it’s just, very different 🙂
after this hospital thing, my Aspie Girl said, “Mom, I hope he lives for a looong time, because you were a wreck, and I’m not ready to deal with you going through that yet!” 🙂 … me, too 😉 … i hope he lives a looong time yet, and she is probably not ready for me to go thru a season of intense grief. (she’s also my one who absorbs the emotions of all those around her; it’d be best if it’s far enough down the road that she’s not living here anymore.)
LOL, yeah, I was in grade 10, hanging around the burger joint and cruising main street for chicks, with little or truly limited success ;-D
Horses, standard cars, backhoes, boats, planes.
If I can climb aboard and start it, I can drive it.
Now if that only worked on women.
Hmmm. Master switch on. Battery on. Fuel pump on. Mixture set to full rich….
Now where the fuck are the igniters on this bitch???
LOL!
LOL, ask the
most experienced guyold fart, kiss her nape ;-Dlol! i’m sure y’all have thought this about me a time or two! sheesh … i’ve thought it about me a time or two! lol!
https://scontent-dfw5-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/39973419_726396591070159_6858794447925149696_n.jpg?_nc_cat=1&oh=89e9536adfd525868786700ce2bc910a&oe=5C39D8DE
seeing if this link works better:
@Ame said: … and he’d simply answer, “It’s not about you.”
I think you said that his parents were very cruel to you. If I’m remembering right, then chances are they were also cruel to him while he was growing up (being cruel to people is a personality disorder in itself; it doesn’t just show up for one person). Under sufficient duress, personalities tend to separate in order to survive (one face for the duress, a different face shown to the world). Plus, if he was bi-polar and/or borderline PD, then he would have a face to show the world while he was dealing with each of those. It is hard to have a genuinely intimate relationship with someone when you truely don’t know which face is going to show up today. Ame, you might benefit from reading some legitimate material about the dogmatic, authoritarian personality type if you haven’t already.
Next point. I have a sister nine years older than I, male blue-baby twins born dead 5 years older than I, a twin brother, and a younger brother and three younger sisters. My birth mother died shortly after giving birth to my brother and me from a ruptured brain aneurysm (the stress of giving birth). The only mother I ever knew was the one who raised me, not the one who birthed me. But that was not true of my older sister. So – we had talks over time. But until my mid-thirties I truely was not interested in my birth mother. Unlike my older sister, I had never known her.
In my mid thirties my dad gave me about thirty or so of the less-intimate letters she had written to him over the course of the four years that she was a missionary in Africa (with a group; not alone). I was genuinely surprised to see on those pages so much of myself – in the things she thought were important and the the way she expressed herself with words. Suddenly, I developed an interest in my birth mother. I began a long-distance conversation with my dad and older sister about my birth mother (they in Washington State, me in Los Angeles). I had questions. And I had comments, based on the evidence of how she expressed herself on paper in ways that I recognized about myself. During one such conversation about this new understanding of mine, dad said something to the effect of I knew her as no one else ever could. I think he maybe felt threatened that I was implying that I knew anything about her at all.
I was out for my usual morning walk a few days later when this thought struck me for the first time ever: I have her genetics in me. And, based on what I saw in her letters, they are expressing themselves in me in a manner similar to how they expressed themselves in her. To the extent that I know myself, I know her in a way that dad never will. Because he does not have her genetic material in him, but I do. I don’t think I ever expressed that thought to dad, but it forever altered how I thought about myself and my relation to my dad and to a woman I had never met, had never known, but did know a bit about by knowing myself.
I had long seen things in my dad that I saw in myself. But there were things in myself that I had never seen in my dad. And suddenly I’m seeing that part of myself on paper, in words written by a lady long dead and whom I had never met. It was an eye opener for me – but only because I had never thought there was any point in thinking about a woman I had never met. Turns out that thought was not correct.
Ame – your daughters have the genetic material of their birth father in them. There are probably things they see in themselves that they see in you – and say “oh, that’s where that comes from”. But there are bound to be things they see in themselves that they do not see in you. From where do those things come, they may wonder. It is probably a good thing for you to keep talking with them about their dad. Tell them stories about the way he thought and behaved and what things affected him in what way (the good stories, but also some of the bad, with some mercy editing where appropriate). I don’t know that you have a collection of letters to give them when they are older, like my dad did with me. But knowing their dad, through the stories you tell about him, will help them integrate themselves internally. The more comfortable they are in their own skin (because of that internal integration), the better they will relate to their future spouse.
I will stop there. This is a complicated subject and we can’t do it justice here – but hopefully I will have triggered some thoughts in you by telling my story. Everything you have said in this thread and elsewhere about the difficulty of starting over with another person in mid-life, I have lived through from the perspective of your daughters. Except that he was 38 and she was 19 – so it is not quite the same story as yours. (The pool of women willing to take on a middle-aged man with a 9-year-old daughter and newborn twins is quite small. He took advantage of what was available.)
Some years after my conversations with my dad and older sister discussed above, aunts and uncles and brothers and sisters and nephews and nieces were gathered at my older sister’s house for some family gathering. My dad was in the middle of some conversation with a bunch of family folks when the aunt who had taken my brother and me from the hospital sidled up to me and spoke quietly in my ear: he never recovered, you know. Suddenly, a great many things shifted in my head and made more sense. I had suspected for a while what she confirmed with those words.
He never recovered, you know.
Neither did Ame. Or any other person who has had their marriage shattered over their objections.
I am willing to bet that neither did Adam ever recover. But, in spite of that, it seems he managed to build a useful life outside of the Garden. Just like all of the rest of us are supposed to do. Accept that full recovery will never happen. In spite of that, the question remains: is it still possible to build a useful life outside of the Garden? The anwer for most folks is “yes”. But it won’t be the life you could have had inside the Garden, so don’t expect it to be.
@ Ame yes we do not want to make it look easy. And I know we both would have avoided it if we could. To me your story is one of hope to women who did not want or choose to divorce or single parent but who had to, and not only survived but rebuilt. You could have checked out, left your kids in a lurch, ran off w some loser guy, started using drugs or whatever. But you didn’t. You rebuilt. Not to glorify it, but it is also not a small accomplishment that you made lemonade from those lemons. There are those who share your story who do need hope. Not hope that if they choose frivorce that they will do better, but that if they are left, one can rebuild for their children and them self. And doing so is much better than imploding. Hugs!
@ Ame, I wish we could totally control our share of straws but as you say, sometimes our straws are just simply taken. By childhood abuse. By how that blinds us to abusers (I would guess your attraction to your ex was in part bc such lack was familiar?) By random bad luck. By illness. By loss. Etc. Why some experience far more or far less can be both just dumb luck or it can be purposeful good/bad choices. Don’t be so hard on yourself k? Your number of straws left were not all your doing. And like horseman said, live in the now.
As one who lost a parent far too young, I can share this firsthand… if you don’t heal your kids can’t either. It is hard to put into words how this affects a kid but trust me, they will absorb the message that if you are broken they are too. Do whatever is needed to make peace w your past and to let it go. For you. For them. For everyone.
And when despite your best efforts you start to go there, think about Ton. Is he living in the past? Heck no! Be like Ton. 🙂
And in case ya’ll were wondering, no I am not online while my guy is here. 😉 His flight got rerouted, so he’s still on his way… soon!
Richard P interesting… my father died in a car accident when I was two. I have only one very fleeting conscious memory of him, although I am told my sun rose and set on him. My mom was so unable to deal w her grief she simply shut the door and never spoke of him. I know very little, just bits and pieces. Even so my moms sister says I remind her of him so much, personality wise! I do think such things are inherited along w eye color and all the rest. I wish I knew more about him… would love to have letters.
Moderation? No bitch on this planet wants only a moderate amount of Ton baby batter
Liz,
“Just watched the video, Larry (my satellite internet is kind of off and on, takes a while to download video sometimes).”
That assignment was the best description of place in the “middle of nowhere”, I loved every minute of it believe me. It was exactly the environment that was necessary to recover from the nasty divorce I went through. Nothing quite like having a pina colada while sitting on a tropical beach and watching an awesome sunset to make one forget about life’s troubles for a bit.
Later on, I would come dangerously close to getting involved a relationship with a very pretty Polynesian 19 yo girl who was hell bent on marriage. If I HAD married the sweet, young thing I’d be chief of the tribe by now with three or four other “orbit” wives. Sigh….Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda
” If I HAD married the sweet, young thing I’d be chief of the tribe by now with three or four other “orbit” wives. Sigh….Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda”
Eh, you’d have probably died of exhaustion by now. 😉
Richard – oh, … wow … this should have come with a warning ***Will Definitely Make Ame Cry!***
yes. everything you wrote in here, yes.
i sent it to my Oldest – she’ll appreciate it. will probably send it to my Youngest, too, after i talk to her about it first.
there is so much of their Dad in them, especially Oldest. she was truly his Daddy’s Girl from the moment she was born. it’s why him rejecting her had such a huge effect on her, even chemically (not sure if i have the correct scientific word there) … she has neurological damage from then … has lost years of memory of her life – good years. she was actually at a place where i thought she was ready to talk about this very recently, and i told her to look up how brains heal. because i think her brain is ready to begin that healing process and begin to reconnect some of those synapses.
it’s why the book of him is always open … they can ask questions or talk about him anytime they want. it will never be closed. and it’s good for me to remember the good stories, too. but, we also talk about the bad. everything is open – some things in moderation according to what is appropriate. they both tell me there are things – the really bad things – they don’t want to know. it’s hard to deal with knowing their Mama was hurt so badly.
interesting on all that, though … my Aspie Girl is better able to process these things than my Oldest. she got to a place where she needed to know some of the really bad things he did so she could move on. i was willing to tell her with the caveat that she not tell her sister until or unless she’s ready – that it will be her choice. so, i told her about his addiction, and the prostitutes. not details, but enough. i had thought this discussion would come up someday in their future, so i had, over the years, prepared them for that … teaching them that God’s love is not exclusive … that He loves prostitutes. talked about those stories in the bible and irl … that there’s nothing God cannot forgive … that people can be loved despite their choices … etc. i didn’t make a big deal about it, just made it a part of life. so when i told her, it was a thing that brought peace. she needed to know. she also knew her dad was forgiven and not a horrible person b/c i never made prostitutes out to be horrible people; just people. who need to be loved.
– – –
yes, his parents were cruel to him, too. and they did it in the Name of God. breaks my heart. especially his dad. if his dad and brother die before his mom, i’ll willingly and gladly take care of her.
– – –
He never recovered, you know.
Neither did Ame. Or any other person who has had their marriage shattered over their objections.
tears.
no. i’ll never fully recover this side of heaven. i keep putting one foot in front of the other. i keep moving forward. i pray more prayers begging God to help me keep moving forward than any other kind. i need it. my girls need it. my potential grandchildren need it. they need to know … we can move forward.
but i will not lie about life, the reality of it, the majesty of it and the cruelty of it. i grew up with lies. my first marriage was surround in lies. and … no more. never again.
– – –
I am willing to bet that neither did Adam ever recover. But, in spite of that, it seems he managed to build a useful life outside of the Garden. Just like all of the rest of us are supposed to do. Accept that full recovery will never happen. In spite of that, the question remains: is it still possible to build a useful life outside of the Garden? The anwer for most folks is “yes”. But it won’t be the life you could have had inside the Garden, so don’t expect it to be.
yes. so profoundly true.
thank you, Richard. very much. thank you.
sooo … i go from crying with tears streaming down my face … to reading Ton’s comment and laughing!
i love you guys out here!
thank you 🙂 🙂 🙂
LOL!!!
” If I HAD married the sweet, young thing I’d be chief of the tribe by now with three or four other “orbit” wives. Sigh….Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda”
Eh, you’d have probably died of exhaustion by now.
Well, you are probably right. But it would have been with a smile on my face. But, noooooo, I have to be “Mr. Responsible” and fuck up a good thing…
https://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/relationships/article-baby-get-back-how-can-i-fend-off-an-ex-from-40-years-ago/
Well duh!
http://www.cbc.ca/news/business/walmart-plus-size-clothing-price-1.4796192
It’s not right’: Shoppers angry over Walmart charging more for plus-size clothing
Well they are buying in bulk.
(No I am not an asshole. 20lbs over still puts you in high end of regular sizes.
Obesity is a self inflicted wound. The pain of fat shaming has to outweigh the pleasure of pie before the behaviour stops.)
I have size 32 and 34 jeans. Period. If the 32 get lose I eat, if the 34 get tight, I cut back my eating and lift.
The first time you buy the next size up instead of eating less for two weeks, you are accepting being fat. Period.
After that its just degrees of rationalization.
The first time you cross the red line and do nothing, you are done.
“Cross dis red line and die you ignorant pigdog!!”
“Ok, dis line of death! Asshoul!”
“Uh well, dis one is de last one! I mean it!”
“Ok how about a nice game of checkers?”
In 25 years of child rearing I got to 3 exactly two times.
They can still tell you the circumstances.
I hold myself to the same standard.
Dont wanna be fat? Dont buy fat clothes.
Dont wanna be a slut? Dont buy miniskirts
Dont wanna be a whore? Dont go home with Drummerboy
Dont want to be unloved? Dont be a bitch to those who love you
Dont wanna be alone after 50? Dont ignore the man you are with.
5 minutes, 20 years of decay, solved.
I mean is this shit really this hard??
Boom baby!
https://www.theglobeandmail.com/investing/personal-finance/retirement/article-facing-a-major-cash-flow-shortfall-how-should-faith-deploy-her/
“Faith is a recently separated, 53-year-old professional woman who makes about $32,000 a year working in the complementary health-care field.
She has two teenagers, one going into second-year university this fall and the other Grade 12. Since the family house was sold, Faith has been renting for about $3,500 a month.”
So divorced, a decade to retirement, she pulls the plug juyst as the kids leave and menopause is in full bloom. Lets see how she is doing and planning for her future…I can’t wait!!
“Faith is spending about $131,000 a year, far more than her employment income. “She admits she has a pretty high ‘burn rate,’ which will not decline significantly when her children are on their own,” he adds. “In the short-term, this is a significant risk.”
High burn rate? I raised two kids and a sahm on 100k, 60k after taxes!
And it wont go down after the kids leave??
But how inquiring minds want to know?
“Fortunately, she has substantial assets, including assets in a corporation – part of her separation agreement – $400,000 of which is available tax-free.”
Monthly outlays: Rent $3,500; condo fee $70; property tax $115; home insurance $105; utilities, maintenance $300; transportation $615; grocery store $1,000; children’s activities, lessons $1,010; clothing $400; gifts, charity $275; vacation, travel $700; dining, drinks, entertainment $475; personal care $260; club memberships $420; golf $100; pets $475; subscriptions $50; other personal $500; health care $150; health, life insurance $215; phones, TV, internet $200. Total: $10,935 Shortfall comes from dividends, savings and investments.
Assets: Bank deposits $1,943,640; corporate assets $1.1-million; lump-sum settlement $400,000; registered retirement savings plan $307,620; tax-free savings account $42,125; recreational property $465,000. Total: $4.26-million
All gleaned from her 30k job! Not!
Guys. If you have money! This will happen to you!!!
Prognosis?
Marries Enrique from Columbia, the 22 year old masseuser she meets on fabulous vacation and is broke before 60!
“I dont know what happened!!”
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vVQNZYGL3Jg/VBIGA8iju2I/AAAAAAAAA4M/syB1BFpLYAU/s1600/glinda.jpg‘
LOL, had a hell of a time not pissing myself:
http://didactsreach.blogspot.com/2018/08/the-reporter-and-priest.html
The problem with Polynesian girls is they turn into Polynesian women. Ie land whales.
Ton, True “The problem with Polynesian girls is they turn into Polynesian women. Ie land whales.”
That is why God made airplanes and passports
I went to church in Downtown LA this morning, like every Sunday morning. There were two young new faces. During lunch I struck up a conversation. It turns out that the young man and woman were friends at a local college, and they had come out to visit a guy at church. He was from Montana. The church guy had done a lot of legal work in Montana. She was from Arkansas. It also turns out that I had gone to the same small college, so instantly it was as if we were from the same family.
She asked if I had any advice. Hee hee.
At the end of the conversation I got to it. “You can’t have it all,” I said. “Decide that his is the dominant career and have your children sooner rather than later.”
It was as if I were debunking her most cherished religious belief. “Why can’t I be the one with the dominant career? Why can’t he be the one that takes on more of the domestic duties?”
“Because of a word that you have never heard before, hypergamy.” I then went on to explain alpha fucks/beta bucks. There is a reason why Fifty Shades of Grey is the third biggest selling book in the English language. “You will lose respect for him, and you will lose your sexual attraction to him.” I went on to say that it isn’t fair to men because we went along with the beta male routine, and all it for us was infidelity and abandonment.
At this point she was trying to squirm away from me as if I were a fortune teller delivering the bad news.
I guess that I can forgive myself for taking so long to get to red pill thinking. Up until a few years ago I thought just like she does. She and I are from the same tribe.
It was interesting how she adamantly rejected every single red pill point that I made. As far as she was concerned, nothing I said had any validity whatsoever.
Roger
I know you want to preach the gospel but small doses buddy.
As Blooms motto let those with ears hear.
Most dont have ears.
I woiuld have answered with “because he cant have babies, only you can. Only you have the power.”
“Once you have your one or two sure you can provide and he can raise them.
But you hear the stories if ivf and the costs. Why risk waiting til 30 or 35?
Have them soon before your career. Then once your career takes off you dont have to interrupt it with mat leaves. One continuous ride.”
That plays to her need to be superior, her maternal instinct while still triggering the key effect. Have the kids.
We both know once she stays home with the first she will see how hard work is and bail.
Same as my advice to you about older women.
It wasnt “Rog, dont risk your money on someone you dont have time to truly know.”
You would said “I know them yada yada.”
Instead I spoke the truth a man can hear. “Dude, has she earned the rest of your life?”
Rollo does a great piece on awakening the sleepers.
Small steps my brother, small steps.
And never ever call out the hypergamy to an asleep woman.
They Always take it as “you personally are a gold digging whore.”
Because once thought about that is all unrestrained hypergamy is and its hard to put lipstick on that one.
But props for the try!
I woiuld have answered with “because he cant have babies, only you can. Only you have the power.”
……
I would have answered “because I fucking said so”
You’re giving your pickup lines away Ton. LOL 🙂
@ Roger the gals her age who hear are few, most are already on the path to marriage, maybe were raised that way. Like my neighbor’s new daughter in law. I was chatting w them, asking their plans, and she’s already saying, “well I plan to do this until we have babies.” He is pursuing the credentials (not college but work experience) to be the breadwinner. I said, “always remember you are a team, even while you are at home w kiddos, his success is your success.” She got it. His dad was nodding very vigorously in agreement. Had she not already “got it” I think she would have just dismissed it instantly as old fashioned/outdated advice.
One has to be ready or open to the ideas to hear them I think, especially young women.
i think i read Roger’s story different from y’all … i saw it as … well … entertainment. that it was fun for him to tell (share with) this couple these truths and watch her squirm. perhaps some will take root, but regardless, sometimes … just watching the reaction.
though … am curious how the guy reacted?
Larry – women who put electronics in their mouths?! stupid, stupid women 🙂
A niece and her husband showed up for a day. The sweetie( my ‘dopted daughter) asked if we could make Belgian waffles, my wife’s favourite breakfast. She has my recipe and made them perfectly, with whipped cream, blackberries, and maple syrup plus ham and baby pork sausages. The husband is lactose intolerant so he had ham and eggs with no complaints. A terrific brunch and proud of the sweetie ;-D
ahhh, BG! that is SOOO sweet! i love your stories 🙂
Well, there is little reason to be mean and nasty. Even the Labrador Deceiver scored a plain waffle with some ham fat and knew that he had the world by the bum with a downhill pull ;-D
Women don’t respond to stimuli like men
Don’t give her an explanation. It won’t work. Explanations and logic is beta ie dry vagina time. Give her directions and overt masculine leadership. Ie wet vagina. And you will get more out of one by landing on the “mean” side of the equation then by landing on the “nice” side of the equation.
Women don’t respond to stimuli like men
Don’t give her an explanation. It won’t work. Explanations and logic is beta ie dry vagina time. Give her directions and overt masculine leadership. Ie wet vagina. And you will get more out of one by landing on the “mean” side of the equation then by landing on the “nice” side of the equation.
truth.
about a month ago i was at my sister’s, and her son, who just graduated from high school, was also there. they were talking about what he wanted to eat, and i was about done with their crazy conversation.
finally i looked at him and said, “What exactly do you want?” so he told me. then i said, “Now tell your Mom exactly what you want and expect her to do it, because you know she will.” they both looked at me funny.
sooo … being me … i had to take it a teensy step further, “You are a young man now. Be a man. Be the one in charge. Tell women what you want and expect them to do it. Genesis 3 gives you the authority to rule over women, so do it.” now they were both really looking at me crazy, but i think some of this was settling in him. i told him to try it out on women and see the results for himself.
he then said, “Did anyone notice this kind of got weird?” i started laughing. Oldest was there, too, and she said without looking up from the book she was reading or blinking an eye or missing a beat, “This is normal for our home.” 🙂
i never expect nuggets like this to instantly change another’s life. however … they are seeds planted. perhaps this kid with a crazy mother (and wonderful Aunt!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂 ) will take these nuggets of wisdom and try them out. perhaps not. but at least the choice is his now that he has the knowledge.
we women do not just love men who take the authority they have and use it well, we need it … and Ton is right that it is (most always) better to land on the mean side than nice. once you’ve established your strength, then you can land on the nice side, but the strength of that is supported by the mean side.
example … Youngest and i were talking about authority in parenting the other day. i reminded her of when they were young, and i’d lower my volume and tone and slow my cadence and get very, very serious. wanna freak little kids out? do that. my girls hated it b/c they knew that whatever Mom said was law at that time, was law, and the consequences were severe. i didn’t use it all the time … but enough. that gave the nice side of me strength – it supported the nice side. when they started to push those boundaries again, mean Mom came out, straightened their cute little butts out again, and we were back to happy land 🙂 . but can’t have happy nice w/out meanie strength. over time, and as they got older, it took much less … but even that much less must be supported by strength. not that i didn’t spend my fair share of time praying my girls wouldn’t force me to hold to my word every.single.time. thankfully, i stood by it on the simple things, so they believed me on the severe things enough not to try most of them out. whew!
same thing with how men are most effective with women – lots like with children.
There is a new post at Spawny’s
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2018/08/27/somebody-to-blame/
@ Ame when my kids were toddlers I learned quickly to phrase things as commands rather than questions. “Get in the car” is an order. “Can you get in the car?” Leaves the option up to them, an option to say, “no.” Kinda the same idea. 🙃
Exactly. There’s a time for choices … Do you want to wear the pink or red shirt today?
Then there’s a time to obey without question.
You’re a good Mommy, Bloom 😃
@ Ame the example to the son may not be the best bc even as a man I would say “honor thy mother and father” trumps authority over women. So I would think for a boy/man authority over women means all but his mother. But maybe not, I am curious what the guys think. And of course a grown man shouldn’t have a “yes mommy” complex.
Bloom – that’s very important.
i didn’t explain it well. she had asked him what he wanted, and he was waffling around with answering her because what he really wanted would have been more work on her part. she asked an open question which he hesitated to answer. to that i told him to answer what he wanted with confidence and authority … to state, “Mom, I want you to make me ____.” then, if she didn’t want to, she could counter – but, she asked. he was being indecisive to try to not make her mad at him … or as a way to get her to do what he really wanted in a manipulative way. and it wasn’t working. at all. she was frustrated. he was frustrated. and he was being weak, and she was responding to that. he’s 18, graduated from high school, and he needs to be decisive.
her house; her money; her time. so if she didn’t want to offer, she shouldn’t have.
if he starts answering her with confident authority, and she doesn’t like it, then she can stop asking. imo … at this age.
also … she did the whole frivorce thing thinking that if she got her son away from his dad, she could do a better job raising him. his dad is … well … he’s probably on the autism spectrum, so he’s quirky and reactive. she knows this and understands how to work with it but got tired of it b/c she wanted what she wanted. well, she should never have married him to begin with, but that’s a whole nother story.
and in the midst of all this, she never gave him the permission or authority to be a man. not that i have the ability necessarily to do that as a woman, but i’m much more stable and informed than she is.
i have no idea if any of my advice to him ‘took,’ and i may never know. she has a love/hate relationship with me and is terribly jealous of me – has been all her life, and there’s not a thing i can do about it except keep a distance.
she tried to malign me with my daughter once … joking something like, “You know, Oldest, your Mom always wants things her way.” (or something like that), and my daughter said, “No, my Mom always gives up herself for us and for what’s best and right.” shut my sister up in a heartbeat.
anyway, i’m sure she didn’t appreciate me stepping in … but watching her create this mamby-pamby young man just put a burr under my skin that i had to get out 😉
i was nice and kinda made it funny, but she didn’t know quite how to respond to it all.
Infuriates the Mrs that I just do this.
“You never ask, you just say stuff and expect it to happen. If you said the sky was purple you think it would just happen!!”
“Uh Yeah, duh.” (Said watching massive storm approaching at sunset and voila…purple sky)
“Ooooo you are such an asshole!”
Then she feels better. I seriously think if she doesn’t call me an asshole every day she gets uptight.
Between logistics where you have 5 minutes to make decisions, healthcare where you affect peoples lives and working with 2000 lb flighty horses I just naturally adapted a mindset where you decide and do. It was required.
I do assume “by your command”. Not pompus. I just expect if anyone objects they will say so. ” Hey boss, not a good idea.” Just like I would.
Asking…ugh….assumes debate, maybe, kinda, howzabout.
No I say, you do unless you have a better idea in which case we discuss and adjust…and then you do.
“Chicken for supper. I don’t feel like it, burgers instead? Ok.”
See how reasonable I am? Now toodle off and make us those burgers…
while I fix the roof.
Ah Ame, I see. Yes agree.
I seriously think if she doesn’t call me an asshole every day she gets uptight.
See how reasonable I am? Now toodle off and make us those burgers…
while I fix the roof.
lol!
i might … or might not … be able to … somewhat … relate to your Mrs 😉
i think this brings up another thing as parents … we need to teach our children to be decisive, to own their decisions, and to own the consequences of their decisions – including the bad ones. and along that vein, we need to allow them to fail, esp when younger and the consequences are not severe.
i realized as my girls grew older that i had done these things inadvertently (whew!). NOT saying i was or am a perfect parent … and my girls will be the first in line to tell you i’m not (thought they’ll also be the first in line to tell you i’m the best and gladly beat anyone up who tries to convince anyone otherwise 😉 (not literally, but … you know 😉 ).
that my nephew is 18 and waffling on making a decision on what he wanted to eat b/c he wasn’t confident enough to state exactly what he wanted when he knew what he wanted? that’s … wrong. sure, there are times we don’t care – or some people don’t care. but unable to state what you want when you know what you do want? that’s … inexcusable, imo.
Between logistics where you have 5 minutes to make decisions, healthcare where you affect peoples lives and working with 2000 lb flighty horses I just naturally adapted a mindset where you decide and do. It was required.
I do assume “by your command”. Not pompus. I just expect if anyone objects they will say so. ” Hey boss, not a good idea.” Just like I would.
Horseman – the first time i truly saw this was with my brother. i had come home from on a college break and was at a pizza joint sitting with another college girl. my brother and his high school friends were all there. he was playing some game with a couple guys when some cute girls bounced (yes, bounced) over to him and asked him what they should order since the waitress had shown up. now, there were other guys there and lots of girls, but my bro was the alpha male, so they went to him. he paused in his game, looked around the room, spit out an order, turned back around, and resumed his game. this might have taken a whole minute. the girl bounced back and gave the order without questioning it. no one questioned it.
and i remember thinking … okay, so that’s how it’s done. i never looked back 🙂
okay … kinda funnee story about my ‘baby’ bro (he’s only 13 months younger, but our sisters are both younger, so i’m the only one who gets to call him ‘baby’ 😉 )
my bff’s mom from high school recently died 😦 … very sad 😦 … anyway, bff has a cousin the same age as us who lived in georgia – we were in florida. she would come down and the three of us hung out … and i totally forgot she was crushing on my brother all those years ago … till we were messaging about the funeral and all that was going on with that, and she asked about my brother. i sent her pics and told of how well he’s done, including his wife and daughter. he still looks really good, even at 52 – great shape, black belt +, works out, etc. she was … me thinks a bit jealous. she’s been married all these years and has two sons, but i think her husband is kind of a safe kind of man. nothing wrong with that, but he’s not the ‘bad boy’ my bro was and is. it was … a moment … nothing life-changing for her, but … a moment of wondering what if. she never had a chance with him; they were very different. i’m sure my bro doesn’t even remember her. if anything comes up about my friends, his only comment is, “There were a lot of hot girls your age. I went thru a lot of them!” *eye roll* lol! *don’t.tell.me.anything.else!* *lalalalala!*
I didn’t yadda, yadda, yadda, Mr. Horseman. Your advice was well-taken. At this time I am not engaged in any conversations with any crazy broads. I stopped texting my high school classmate last week. I put the high school reunion t-shirt that I had saved for her in the mail to her last week. She hasn’t even lifted her pretty little fingers to tell me that it arrived. I’m sure that I’ll never hear from her again.
I want to discuss the pathology of the women of my tribe. Let me call the women of my tribe the Talented Tenth. The only time that you see women of the Talented Tenth together in one place is at a good college. They can also be described as ABWW, American Bourgeois White Woman.
I want to say that the women of my tribe are worse than gold digging whores. You see, a gold digging whore understands that her plow horse requires some amount of care. A gold digging whore understands that her plow horse has value and that she is dependent on him. Not so with the women of my tribe. The women of my tribe are hypergamous, but their hypergamy is undercover. Worse, the women of my tribe are misandrous, which is also undercover. The solipsism of the women of my tribe is so profound that they have no idea that they are completely hypergamous and misandrous. And all the while they are hypervigilant of being vicitimized by the patriarchy.
I enjoyed talking to my tribal youngster yesterday. She was clearly at the height of her sex market value. She was, as they used to say, single, 20, and white. My church serves a light lunch after the service. The other youngster, the guy that she came with (I’m sure that he was the one who wanted to come out, and she was the one who had the car.) sat down next to the guy he came out to see and left her and I to sit at our own table. Twenty minutes later he decided that he had made a mistake. He needn’t have worried. I was pretending that I was talking to the daughter that I never had. I never wanted to have children, but I get emotional for a second when I think about how raising a girl to be a young woman like her was beyond what my circumstances would have allowed. It was just a daydream. Still, I spoke to her as I would have spoken to my daughter.
They are all headed for divorce and single motherhood. I went to a college reunion for the class behind me, and when I saw an old friend the first thing out of his mouth was, “They’re all divorced.” That was not a throw-away comment. It was significant. Twenty-five years later we can say that almost none of the women that we were messing with were marriage material.
What is interesting to me is how women of my tribe see men merely as mute props in the play in which they are the producer, director, and lead actor. In marriage they hold all of the cards while pretending to be oppressed. When I ask a woman of my tribe, “As you get ready to be a man’s wife, are you ready, willing, and able to meet his physical, emotional, and sexual needs?” I get the RCA dog. What? Who?Needs?
She says, “It’s about my needs, buster. A man has no needs that I am bound to satisfy.”
This is the kind of woman that I was habituated to. That’s why today I am all about hookers, pornstars, sex dolls, and virtual reality pornography.
Holy shit this is scary!!
https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2018/08/27/percentage-of-us-population-over-15-who-were-married-by-sex-and-race-1950-2017/
We always say the black community is where we are going.
%married 1950 white women 66%, black wome 62. Basically 2 in 3 each.
2017 white women 53% 1 in 2, black women 32. 1 in 3.
Wow. The rest of the stats and the chart is shocking.
Forget the return of marriage, traditional roles, feminism, patriarchy!
Long term bonding is dead!!
How do we have and raise babies going forward.
Sex, money, ecomomy actually does better with individuals only consuming and working for their own selfish interests. Its only the baby thing that fucks it up.
@ horseman I do get what you are saying but wanted to add this approach may work for most but could backfire w someone such as myself. I have lots of abandonment anxiety from losing my father at age 2, then was not raised w a male role model either. Bc of this I tend to misinterpret common male behaviors like this. Gruffness can send me into a major spin bc I often read it as rejection/abandonment rather than as “just how guys are.” Luckily my guy now is not gruff while also not a pansy in any way. He’s just very even keeled and for me, it’s a good thing bc it helps me feel calm and safe. Maybe you have seen similar in special needs horses, they don’t react to things in the same way and so need some adaptations to the usual routine. So what I am saying I suppose is there’s the general rule and then there’s cases where that might be just the wrong thing. Knowing ones partner can help prevent needless misunderstanding. All that said the time I have spent in the manosphere has greatly helped me understand how guys tick (although I still do and maybe always will get it wrong sometimes.) For much of my life I related to men as one would w women and naturally that did not work so well. It was only after finding the manosphere that I got how very differently the male and female minds work. Anyway, know your partner before whipping out the hard dread etc. would be my advice.
Bloom agreed.
The downside is you are “on” 24\7\365. (Will someone but me make a fucking decision on anything!!)
Because you decide. Frankly I dont give a fuck what we have for supper but I better order otherwise its three hours of Chicken? Fish? Oh I don’t know!
Its not hard dread.
In fact its the opposite.
It is so much easier for her to abdicate the day to day stuff. She is intelligent, volatile and passionate. Stuff she cares about she is a cast iron bitch. But also being a people pleaser she wants everyone to be happy all the time. So she is “wadda you think yada yada.”
I just cut to the chase and tell her before she has to ask. Then she can get on with her day and we are all happy.
Fuck half the time my “considered opinions” are stuff I literally pulled out of my ass.
But all the years of being in charge I just say even trivial things with “the command voice.” And on day to day stuff it makes everyone calm
The horse doesnt care which way we run when the scary mouse jumps out of the bushes!!!
They want a leader to say “Run! Now! That way!” Because in the wild the 3 seconds it takes to decide, the mouse is on you! And the slowest horse is mouse food!!
And yes mouse. Had a 18-3 Belgian charge thru a metal ten foot gate, knocked it off its pins into the air, bent it to hell. Why? A field mouse was in her grain bucket and she went eyeball to eyeball with it.
Aaaaagh!! Scary mouse!! Horse Eating Killer!! Thev Squeker of Death!!! Aaaaaaaay.
WadoIdo? Wa do I do? Agggh!!
Oh dad! Your here! Oh thank Silver!
Ok! Im ok now!! Sob! Its was Hooooorrible!
I didn’t know what to Doooooo!!
Its not gruffness. Actually many have said my manner and tone are like the aged Robert Redford in his recent stuff. Quiet. Calm. Mannerly. Just firm.
Excellent movie. Character study. No big plot. Just examining two old people alone who decide to platonically keep each other company.
(Usually hate Fonda but she is good in this.)
On netflix.
Bloom, i’m very skittish, too 😦
my Husband is VERY patient with me. sometimes i’m good; sometimes i crumble.
it’s hard to read us, sometimes, out here, i think. there’s only so much of who we are that we can present in writing.
i often wonder, when i’m reading a book, if i’m reading a character as the author imagined him/her.
out here … sometimes i wonder how it would be meeting irl. we’d get more of the whole picture of each other. it seems the topics lean us toward reacting to and within a certain section of the world/our world … but not the whole.
and some things i don’t quite know how to articulate in ways that would be received in the proper context. so … i guess some imagination is necessary to fill in the rest of the picture?
that’s how i tend to see it, at least.
i wonder if i react to one thing i read in a person that may or may not have anything to do with who they really are.
now i feel like i’m talking in circles 🙂
i’ll just pretend most of the guys are strong and yet gentle … that b/c they’re strong, they can also be gentle 🙂 … i feel safer that way 🙂
but … a lot of what they write … i’m not sure if i’d want to curl up in a corner and hide when i met them … or if i’d feel safe enough to sit at the table and enjoy the conversation.
i’m so sorry you lost your dad so young. do you think loosing her husband at that time caused your mom to become so fiercely independent? or do you think she was already like that?
fwiw, Bloom – i think you’re very brave to be out here with a blog like this. it’s a harsh place to be.
and i’m sooo thankful i’m not single … i would not be able to read this stuff often if i were.
Just checking in. Ame … I will soon to be joining you. I’m getting married to the gf. Asked her this weekend and she said yes. So starting to figure things out and plan. Thinking sometime in the next 2-3 months, before the end of the year for sure. It was only a matter of time, kinda surprised it took this long. Lots of decisions to make now, etc. We agreed that she should sell her house and move in with me. Means bringing lots of animals and all her stuff. Combining her stuff with my stuff. Lots and lots of decisions to be made.
Like most men in the Sphere … I am a strong believer in marriage and HATE that its gotten to this point. Women hating men, treating them like garbage, men not knowing how to deal with it, marriage and childbirth plummeting as a result. Men just giving up and checking out. Society in decline. See … I believe men and women belong together and are far stronger as a team … then either are when alone and separated. Which is of course why progressives, liberals, socialists … all the HATERS … why they want to destroy marriage, the family, and society. Liberalism is a mental illness. Feminism is a cancer. Its all true. So they hate us, want to destroy us, and want to make sure we don’t succeed. Well … here’s my middle finger to all the haters … gonna do it anyway.
Anyway, sorry for the rant. I’m very happy that I found someone I love and want to be with, and who I trust. And it means I can get out of the shithole which is modern dating and current society. My spouse and I will carve out our won private life, be happy, and the progressive shithole can go suck an egg.
Anyway, just stopping by to drop the news.
Peace
This is really the bottom line isn’t it? RPG said:
“Meanwhile, he’s happier. He’s living a simple life, and is fine with it. He’ll still go to work and all the rest like before, except instead of coming home to strife he now comes home to peace.”
Western women thrive on drama, turmoil and uncertainty. Anything that stirs the shit pot to keep from being bored will do, eh? Leave a man to his own devices without having to deal with female noise, eventually he will carve out a quite, peaceful place for himself, by himself.
Exhibit A: A Man in his peaceful niche, sans any bat-shit crazy female drama
Helmets are for pussies
ahhh, Mega!!! great BIG HAPPY SMILE just for you and your Beloved!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂
life is real … but it’s so much better, SOOO much better, with someone you love and trust by your side, sleeping with you each night, knowing who you are, you knowing who they are, and you love each other anyway 🙂
congratulations 🙂 🙂 🙂
(decisions decisions! sometimes i want just a day off from having to make any decisions 😉 )
Haha, Ame … thought you’d approve. Kinda funny that you mentioned the “sleeping” thing because I think that is a unknown part of reality that everyone should learn about. Women hate sleeping alone. They want a man beside them. Men don’t have this fear. This anxiety. They don’t care. Actually, men sleep better alone. Women ? They never feel safe sleeping alone. I mentioned it to the GF awhile back … her son is moving out and she’ll be alone after that. Said she didn’t care, that it didn’t matter. Didn’t buy it. Every weekend when she is here, she sleeps like a baby, sleeps 2 hrs longer than when at home, and doesn’t want to leave after she gets going. YEAH … THINK ???
Women want a strong man for protection. Sleep WAY better with a man in the bed. And besides, the GF loves morning sex and what man doesn’t like that. Are the two things related ???? Good question and never really thought about it. All I know is she sleeps way better … with me. And the morning sex is great. That’s all I care about. She’s happy; I’m happy. Sometimes it nice to be a guy and tune out shit like that. Unfortunately, being very smart … sometimes stuff like that creeps back in. So … no thinking about it now !!! Don’t suck me in !!! If someone else in the sphere wants to address that situation … go for it. But not me. I’ve got enough on my plate. I’m happy. She’s happy. That’s all I need.
Mega
Mega
Congratulations, hang on to her close.
lol, Mega!
that’s interesting. i think i sleep better alone in bed b/c i’m used to responding to sounds i hear thru the night – guess it’s a Mom-thing? idk. but i like him in the house, and i do like him in bed with me. him? he likes falling asleep getting a back rub 🙂 … guess i’ve got him a bit spoiled 🙂
and if truth be fully known, i sleep better during the day than at night, anyway. never remember sleeping well at night – probably due to all that yuck when i was a little girl. i do tend to get a lot done at night when i am awake sometimes, though, but only if i’m not feeling guilty for being awake 🙂 don’t’cha love a woman 🙂 my husband just rolls his eyes and chuckles at me. you know … FMFM and give him his back rub … and enjoy life together … we’re good 🙂
when he was in the hospital, though … i was a wreck. i’m not sure when i slept or for how long. i totally fell apart. my daughter said, “Mom, I hope he lives a looong time, because you’re gonna be terrible when he dies, and I need to be a little bit older to be able to really help you.” 🙂
Thanks “b g”. Its kinda funny. Anyone who’s seen us together all agree. We make a great couple. Her family. My family. Friends. All who know us, wish us well and everyone who’s seen us together say the same thing: what took you so long ? I think its obvious when you love someone and trust someone. There’s no games and no bs. Just loving someone for who they are (with all their imperfections) and being lovedin return (with all your imperfections). Sounds easy. Sounds simple. IT ISN”T !!!
Hmmm, it was never easy. I met her 50 years ago, I was already rather avoiding females in university, a recluse if not becoming a hermit. That changed in the moment that I saw her and her girlfriend show up. Her gf carried the lightest package, I told her that I would carry her packages into her suite. She dipped her eyes, the classic hairy eyes to see if I had noticed her, and stick a fork in me, I was done ;-D,
But agreed , it is never easy ;-D
d
d
Mega,
That is awesome Mega!!!! Very happy for you and your future wife ❤ ❤ ❤
I love seeing couples get together and find happiness … makes my entire YEAR!!!
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I’m a bit late to this, but I hope he didn’t get divorce-raped by a false DV claim and lose his son…
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