Ahhh, Valentines Day. A day wrought with high expectations. I heard once more couples fight on Valentines than not. I am not sure it’s true, but if so it wouldn’t surprise me.
Many times Valentine’s is focused on, “What did I get?” Not, “What can I give?”
This Valentine’s take a different approach. Instead of picking apart your relationship, or the day, or having high expectations of the dozen roses and right restaurant and the blah blah blah, focus on the good.
Focus on how YOU can show love, appreciation, and gratitude. And the many things big and small you have to be greatful for. Forget what’s missing, focus on what’s there. Everybody’s Valentines Day will be better off for it.
And if you are alone this Valentines, also try to focus on what you have not what you don’t. I bet there is someone you could show love to and for today even if it’s not romantic love. Doing so will make their day and yours much better than focusing on what’s missing.
Happy Valentine’s folks! I love you! Each and every one! Thank you for reading this! Thank you for all the wisdom and caring and concern you have shared, given, and shown for me over the years! I appreciate it and YOU!
💞💕❤️💕💞
What do you think about Valentines? Please share in the comments!
Great post, Bloom!
Love back at yah. 🙂
(((hugs all around)))
Im fortunate. My husband shows me he loves me every day. This is, frankly, a manufactured holiday to make those who are single feel bad about not being in a relationship ( I know, I did for many years) and those who are, to spend ridiculous amounts of money to show something that should be shown daily. But, whatever makes yall happy. No one love a nice gift more than me, but there is no pressure or expectation, at least today. Bliss.
In any case, agree with Bloom. Will tell hubby this evening how much I love and appreciate him. Then Ill cook a restaurant quality dinner to enjoy. Done and Done 🙂
RPG,
I said this in the previous thread, but it’s good enough to say again. I can remember grade school, where we would all make cards to give to each other. It was a lot less complicated then. You’d get a card.
When I was a teenager I figured out that if I needed a holiday to tell me to express love to my spouse, then I was a piss poor man. So if my wife is looking for a special day, she should be ready any day of the year except today. We still celebrate valentines day, but neither of us have any real expectations for the day.
We got gifts for each other. (you will all love how romantic these gifts are 🙂 ). We have needed a new skillet in the kitchen since Oct., but when the anniversary came there were other priorities, so no skillet. Christmas, nope she wanted other things. So valentines day is going to be the day for a new skillet.
What about the gift she is getting me? Well it just so happens that when I was out deer hunting this year, it became apparent that I need a good pair of functioning binoculars (my old ones have been well used by the family). So I go online and find a pair I want, put it in her amazon shopping cart. She notices that they are kinda pricey for our budget, but all she says is “can I use these for bird watching?”. I chuckled at that.
Well she has to work this evening, but when she gets home I will make sure that she is worn out and sleeps well. 😉
Good idea, RPG.
I’m in my 12th year with my man. We don’t focus on gifts but rather spending quality time together.
I’m glad he’s my partner in life. We do things our own way and don’t follow anyone’s rules on how to be a man or a woman.
He’s followed me here to the coast to be closer to my family after my mom passed away.
He doesn’t think he’s too good to do the dishes or cook dinner. He doesn’t expect anything out of me that he wouldn’t be willing to also do himself and *that* is why he has earned my respect. That is part of why I find him more sexy and irresistible every day.
Fuzzie my youngest is taking cards today. The teacher sent home a list of names and said each student needed to give one to everybody, and they had to write all the to and from names by themselves. She sat with the list checking them offone by one. Then I got miniature ball point pens with a Valentine’s theme and she tucked and clipped onto each. (The teacher requested no candy.) Including one for her teacher! And then she made one for her sister too. Awwww! She’s pretty excited! Yes, those were simpler times indeed! 💞❤️💞
RPG,
It’s good that the teacher applied those conditions. This day should not be a source of jealousy and resentment for kids.
Life was simpler then. Simple is good. Now, I want some ice cream.
Cards, candy, flowers et al? meh……I let my wife take food from my plate that she wants….she has a warm house to live in, a bed shared with only one other person, new clothes and shoes to wear. These were things she did not have before we married
I’ve got my hooker phone (the smart phone dedicated to whoring), and I am wishing all of my hookers a happy Valentine’s Day.
Never cared for Valentine’s day. Just a manufactured day to feed the beast. More fun to surprise her when she least expects it. Not on some predictable day where dead flowers get marked up. Here is my take on it if you must “celebrate” it. Some interesting “cards”.
https://didactsreach.blogspot.com/2019/02/happy-made-up-stupid-fake-holiday.html
my Oldest takes care of her health and eats well, but she gives herself one ‘treat’ day a month. she likes to give herself a ‘treat’ day on a holiday, so she gave herself a decadent chocolate dessert for valentine’s day … simply b/c it’s the holiday in february 🙂
Ame
Kid, hope that you are feeling better, and have a Happy Valentines Day ;-D
ahhh, BG, thanks for cking on me!
it’s actually a really rough road 😦 … overall, i’m moving in the right direction, just v.e.r.y…s.l.o.w.l.y. ups and downs, good days and bad days and really bad days. learning to be patient with myself.
took both my girls into the same nutritionist doc and love what she’s doing with them.
when i objectively look at the things that happened, these body-things make sense. when i took my girls in and we reviewed their history (which is always a bit stressful to live it all again), it is overwhelming to think of what their bodies went thru when their dad was at his peak of being mean to them … during their adolescense … how that disrupted their hormones in bad ways while they were changing and developing. Nutritionist has got this and is helping them. it’s hard on Mama to know that i couldn’t protect them from all of it 😦
all dairy is now out of the house for all of us. the only food with grains we have is Ezekiel bread and that only occasionally. lean meats in moderation. still no eggs for me. very simple diet of mostly healthy veg’s and healthy fruits.
i’m extremely impressed with this nutritionist and wish i’d thought to use a nutritionist many years ago. she knows her stuff. there’s nothing that stumps her or confounds her. i think all health journeys should include a nutritionist now. i had no idea.
i’ve had a low-grade virus hanging around in my system for a looong time that i haven’t been able to kick out. we’ll eventually root it out completely, but in the meantime, if i get worn down (which i do easily still), it takes over and wreaks havoc (like the last 24 hours 😦 ) … and reminds me i still have to take it very easy, esp on days i feel great.
anyway … probably more than you wanted to know. thank you so much for asking, BG 🙂
BG – i write about it occasionally at my blog. you’re welcome to visit anytime: http://www.blendingame.wordpress.com.
Ame
Take your time, patience is also a virtue. A week ago or so I had a couple of dozen of my wife’s early crocuses blooming and was hoping for an early Spring. Then we got a foot and a half of heavy wet glowbull warming and the kids got a couple of snow days off of school. They went tobogganing and then came to help me shovel the driveway. Got to show some faith, Spring will come ;-D
Now that Valentine’s Day is over, we can get back to the business at hand, i.e., going hard in the paint on American women.
RPG, let’s get back to your little air force veteran doing the empty-nest eat-pray-love thing. You don’t seem to realize the damage that she has done to your reputation as a fellow American woman. You are talking about approaching this woman with a discussion of all of the things that she will miss out on as a result of the divorce. You write, “Maybe what women are not taught today, and it’s a big failing, is to think multigenerationally. Not what’s best for me? But what’s best for my line?”
The men on this blog, on the other hand, take a much harder line. The first comment, from Lexet Blog, included this quote, “…if it wasn’t because of adultery or abandonment, cut her off.”
Women are going to find that there are consequences for promoting a culture where a man who has done everything right can look forward to his wife frivorcing him as soon as she finds it convenient to do so.
This woman isn’t just misguided. She and all American women like her are an existential threat to all American women. American women need to start coming down on other American women as if their lives depended on it.
Fuzzie put it well the other day when he said that American women have so destroyed their reputation that high-quality American men no longer want anything to do with them.
The end result of all of this is MGTOW. You end of getting a generation of guys like me, Roger Blakely MGTOW (but you can call me “hookers and pornstars”). American men are getting to the point where they are willing to let American women die. Let me tell you something: I haven’t spoken to my mother in two years, and It is very likely that I will never speak to her again.
@Larry G: “After I shitcanned my ex, got me a pretty girl who is 18 years younger.”
Larry G, are you kidding me? In So Cal the hooker list is so vast, and there is so much fresh meat coming on-stream daily, that you could have sex with an eighteen- or nineteen-year-old every weekend for the rest of your life and never see the same woman twice.
ahhh, thank you, BG 🙂 🙂 🙂
Roger – we do tell women the truth, but they often don’t listen. you can lead a horse to water … and all that.
yes, i do know how this is destroying women. i also know … wide is the path that leads to destruction and many follow it … and narrow is the path that leads to Life and few follow it.
as Bloom says … may those who have ears, hear.
A new post At Spawny’s there is
https://spawnyspace.wordpress.com/2019/02/15/up-shift/
Yeah, Ame, you’re right.
It’s going to take me a few days to pull together my next post. Nicolle Michelle, the black dating coach out of Atlanta, just posted a heart-wrenching rant about how she is abandoning her efforts at getting rank-and-file black women to listen to her advice about how to transform themselves into marriage material. She is now conceding what high-quality black men have been telling her for years; i.e., that Gen X and Millennial black women are finished. There is no hope for them. At this point only Gen Z women have a shot at having a traditional nuclear family.
that Gen X and Millennial black women are finished. There is no hope for them. At this point only Gen Z women have a shot at having a traditional nuclear family.
that is heartbreaking, Roger … but even God came to those conclusions and wiped out people groups in the Bible.
my daughters are Gen Z and are very conservative. i hope that if either ever gets married that they will have a good, solid, biblical, marriage … full of lots and lots of sex 🙂
in the Bible, God raised up prophets to speak Truth to wayward peoples. sometimes those people still chose against God. it broke the heart of the prophets but not as much as it broke the heart of God.
it is the Holy Spirit’s job to convict – that was a hard truth for me to learn. it’s not my job to convict people, it’s only my job to tell the Truth. i can’t make people believe, but i can know they were given a choice.
i’m learning to walk away after telling the Truth. i can’t emotionally ingest all of that; i just can’t.
i think Amos 4 is a very telling chapter … and the Truth at the end should make us all shake in our boots, “Prepare to meet your God.” we WILL all meet God someday. that is Truth.
Amos 4
Hear this word, you cows of Bashan on Mount Samaria,
you women who oppress the poor and crush the needy
and say to your husbands, “Bring us some drinks!”
2 The Sovereign Lord has sworn by his holiness:
“The time will surely come
when you will be taken away with hooks,
the last of you with fishhooks.[a]
3 You will each go straight out
through breaches in the wall,
and you will be cast out toward Harmon,[b]”
declares the Lord.
4 “Go to Bethel and sin;
go to Gilgal and sin yet more.
Bring your sacrifices every morning,
your tithes every three years.[c]
5 Burn leavened bread as a thank offering
and brag about your freewill offerings—
boast about them, you Israelites,
for this is what you love to do,”
declares the Sovereign Lord.
6 “I gave you empty stomachs in every city
and lack of bread in every town,
yet you have not returned to me,”
declares the Lord.
7 “I also withheld rain from you
when the harvest was still three months away.
I sent rain on one town,
but withheld it from another.
One field had rain;
another had none and dried up.
8 People staggered from town to town for water
but did not get enough to drink,
yet you have not returned to me,”
declares the Lord.
9 “Many times I struck your gardens and vineyards,
destroying them with blight and mildew.
Locusts devoured your fig and olive trees,
yet you have not returned to me,”
declares the Lord.
10 “I sent plagues among you
as I did to Egypt.
I killed your young men with the sword,
along with your captured horses.
I filled your nostrils with the stench of your camps,
yet you have not returned to me,”
declares the Lord.
11 “I overthrew some of you
as I overthrew Sodom and Gomorrah.
You were like a burning stick snatched from the fire,
yet you have not returned to me,”
declares the Lord.
12 “Therefore this is what I will do to you, Israel,
and because I will do this to you, Israel,
prepare to meet your God.”
13 He who forms the mountains,
who creates the wind,
and who reveals his thoughts to mankind,
who turns dawn to darkness,
and treads on the heights of the earth—
the Lord God Almighty is his name.
btw, Roger, have you decided to read the Bible yet?
OK, OK. I’ll start with Paul. (Paul was a real whack-job.)
“@Larry G: “After I shitcanned my ex, got me a pretty girl who is 18 years younger.”
Larry G, are you kidding me? In So Cal the hooker list is so vast, and there is so much fresh meat coming on-stream daily, that you could have sex with an eighteen- or nineteen-year-old every weekend for the rest of your life and never see the same woman twice.”
LMAO! Roger, thanks bud for the recommendation for Calif. hookers, although quite unnecessary. I lived in S. Cal for several years so I’m aware of the possibility’s for “entertainment”.
My young wife after the disposal of the ex was an arranged marriage in a foreign country, soooo not western culture.
Paul was an incredibly brilliant man! he had an excellent education and was a super elite military guy whose sole purpose in life was murdering Christians … till he met Jesus. quite an extraordinary story!
it’s better to begin at the beginning, though, in Genesis 1 🙂
“Paul was an incredibly brilliant man! he had an excellent education and was a super elite military guy”
Ame, where in the Bible does it say Paul was military? No reference that I am aware of
Larry, i stand corrected. he was NOT military … he was a tent maker. i always think of him as military in my mind b/c of how he persecuted christians.
this is interesting: https://biblehub.com/library/schaff/history_of_the_christian_church_volume_i/section_30_paul_before_his.htm#1
and thank you for calling me out on that!
Ame, I’ll never “call out” anyone on Scripture. I thought maybe you had found a reference to Paul’s affiliation with a military . He was a tentmaker and a Pharisee for sure, that much I was sure of
Ame,
It was St. George who was military. But Paul was a Roman citizen.
thank you, Fuzzie. i usually fact check that stuff before i post b/c i tend to get some details like that mixed up. i didn’t this time. my bad. i hate that i posted something false about the bible b/c i didn’t take the time to ck first. *lessons.learned.the.hard.way*
Ah, Valentine’s Day … I usually remember this lovely song from the 1980s.
“With your heart on parade and your heart on parole
I hope you find a sucker to buy that mink stole
School for scandal … guess who’s enrolled?
Don’t ask me, I already know!”
Apparently most Americans when they try to transcribe the lyrics for the verses about “magazines” can’t fathom British accents or they’d realise the lyrics are very much 18+ rated … 🙂
“If you gave me a pound for the moments I missed
And I got dancing lessons for all the lips I shoulda kissed
I’d be a millionaire …
I’d be a Fred Astaire!”
I’ll go on record as hating Valentines Day. Always have … even long before I took the red pill. Seems like a totally fake holiday, designed for men to worship women and spend money on them. And for women to expect it. IS THERE SUCH A HOLIDAY FOR MEN ????
And there is your answer for “what is feminism all about ?”. Its NOT about equality of course … that’s just a lie … its really about putting women on a pedestal and having men worship them. Putting women at the top of the totem poll. Women do nothing and get shit for free … because they have a vagina. And men get to work their asses off to get money to spend on women … because women have a vagina.
That’s all it is and … sorry folks, but that ain’t equality. Its vagina worship. Feminism is a lying. Convincing women they get shit for free. And “trying” to convince men they are worthless pieces of garbage who have to bribe women with free shit … for them to even be with them. And, who wants to be treated like garbage. Not me.
Valentines Day is a HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE holiday. Worst of the worst.
So, now that the average women makes more than the average man … can someone wake me up when there’s an equivalent holiday for men. Not waiting of course … because I’m not that stupid. IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN. Cause, you know, Feminism. Female gender bias and all that.
Sister of an early feminist comments:
https://eagleforum.org/publications/efr/jan19/my-sister-kate.html#.XGQRPZIWt8E.twitter
wow, BG.
Feminist leader Kate Millett wrote Sexual Politics in 1970, which the New York Times called “the Bible of Women’s Liberation.” But her sister Mallory Millett reveals in this interview the destructive legacy of radical feminism.
…
Tapson: Can you tell us a bit about Kate’s mental instability, and if you think it had anything to do with her radicalism? Or vice versa — do you think her radicalism affected her mental state?
Millett: Kate was mentally ill for as long as I remember. She was five when I was born and our elder sister Sally says that once I arrived, Kate was hanging over my bassinet plotting my murder. We shared a bedroom from my birth. From my earliest memory I recall trembling from the vibrations of her insanity. She was the most disturbed, megalomaniacal, evil and dishonest person I have ever known. She tried to kill me so many times that it’s now an enormous blur of traumatizing horrors. She was a sadist, a torturer, a deeply-engrained bully who took immense pleasure in hurting others. Incorrigible and ruthless, she was expelled multiple times from every school she attended. I spent my childhood with heart hammering as I tiptoed through the house so as not to be noticed by the dreadful Kate. Our mother was helpless, paralyzed with terror in the face of Kate.
https://eagleforum.org/publications/efr/jan19/my-sister-kate.html#.XGQRPZIWt8E.twitter
Ame,
It’s all right. I have done as much myself. It usually stems from reading something decades ago that was incorrect.
bg,
It is good to be reminded of Kate Millett. There is a lot out there in a similar vein for Gloria Steinem, not to mention Valerie Solanis. That is what feminism has hitched their plow to.
Mega,
Somebody tried. While SSM’s blog was at its height, someone proposed Steak and BJ Day to be celebrated March 14th. It failed. It couldn’t have been the lack of enthusiasm from men. Could it have been retailers? They don’t make a whole lot of money from women giving oral sex.
Here’s your card (and maybe chocolate) love you!!
And here’s you card (and maybe chocolate) love you too!!
Less than ten bucks each.
Wish every holiday was that cheap and easy.
Valentines day is the shit!
The Girls got me a bottle of 116 proof wild turkey and a new to me Cane Corso. Then we griled steak and got drunk on the doc while laughing at my new dog doing dumb shit then I gave them my cock
All this shit is what you make of it. If you’re a chump then yeah it’s money laid down for nothing. If you are sovergien then it’s whatever kind of day you want it to be on your terms
Ame
Mallory’s comments on the origin of NOW should also shock women your age. Some now try to blame Baby Boomers, but the feminist leadership were all born 10-15 years before the Boomers arrived…or older like Friedan. Basically most came of age during the period when the bulk of the best men were fighting overseas.
https://www.traditioninaction.org/HotTopics/d013_Marxist.htm
Fuzzie
Yeah, most were nasty people. Friedan was a lying old commie bitchin’, pissin’, and moanin’ while living in a mansion with servants and talking proudly of beating up her elderly wealthy husband.
Black dating coach Nicole Michelle in Atlanta posted a heart-wrenching rant about why she is giving up on all but a few black women. It is over for back women. There is no saving them. Here are the talking points.
She speaks with passion because the future of black women is so bleak. She never intended to be the Jeremiah of black women. She tells them the truth, and they call her fat and ugly. Everyone has asked her to stop taking the beatdown.
Black women are a lost cause. The are unfeminine, overweight, loudmouthed. They have bad attitudes and too many baby daddies.
They don’t want to be wives. They want to be daughters. Fathers love their daughters unconditionally and can never leave. Top-flight husbands have rules and conditions and they can leave at any time. These black women want no rules to follow or responsibilities to meet. Many men just creep because it is easier. They don’t want to be told to lose weight. They don’t want to be told that having children out of wedlock with lose men is losing. To them having a big butt and big breasts and being able to manipulate men is winning. They want to be told that they are beautiful at 300 pounds and that their bull ring is fine. They want to be told that it is fine to extend their ho phase into their 40s.
They want me to tell them how to be feminine, what to wear, how to talk, how to stand. They don’t want to be feminine to be a wife. They want to trick a provider-protector man into thinking that they are something that they’re not. They want a gimmick.
Happy wives aren’t on social media.
They don’t want to level up to be what an alpha male wants. Deep down they know that they are not wife material.
Many dating coaches have figured out how to make a lot of money from lost black women. A really good looking black man gets himself in front of black women and tells them what they want to hear. They are perfect just the way that they are and that the problem is that black men ain’t shit. It is so sad because these people know that it is all over for black women.
b g,
I am a cruel bear. It is fun to see transgenders giving feminists fits of apoplexy.
The current bunch aren’t very nice either.
Liz,
I think the objection is that all the favors are going one way. Your comment reminded me of employers who operated that way. It was such a relief to give them notice. It’s my guess that you have had a few of those too.
Roger,
Back in the 90s, I had a long talk with a kitchen worker who wasn’t Mexican in California. He was full monk mode before MGTOW was a thing. I guess that I don’t have to tell that he was black. From what he told me, the greater portion of it is attitude and that is something that is not restricted to race.
Somebody else giving feminists fits of apoplexy. *smiling face*
RPG,
Close to the end, she borrows your usual sign off. I think she is a frequent reader.
Dang … “My sister Kate” … there is some harsh, ugly … ugly reality. Wonder why that ain’t published at HuffPo ? LOL.
If I was that chick I’d be fearing Antifas would be burning down my house … but guess that after all this time, and her age, and what she’s been thru … she probably doesn’t give a shit anymore. Bless her for stating the truth for those willing to listen and able to get access to her story.
Really made me cringe reading some of that too, and that’s hard to do. Poor woman has been thru hell. Even wonder what it would be like to wake up and find out your brother was Adolf Hitler … well, that’s kinda what it was like.
Thanks for the link BG …
I was talking to today’s provider (my first repeat) about her future on the sex Web Site. She is finishing a post-graduate degree at university, and her finances are tight. She is on the sight because it is easy money and she needs the money. I asked her if she would quit hooking after she got a good job. I also told her about my frustration with the provider that I met, Alice, whose day job was as a nurse. It seems to me that men are being victimized when women charge for sex when they have good jobs and don’t need the money anymore. Why not just be a normal person looking for love on Match.com?
She had an interesting answer. She tried dating Web Sites and felt victimized. Every man she went out with just wanted to spend as little as possible on her to get her into bed, and none of them were interested in establishing a relationship. On the sex Web Site, in contrast, she finds a higher quality of man who is ready, willing, and able to pay $300-$400 for sex. The men on the sex Web Site treat her better.
I’m not sure that I like the idea, but I can see her point. I guess that she is describing DeAnna Lorraine’s Romance Apocalypse from the woman’s perspective. Men are just looking for the least amount of time, effort, and money needed to get sex.
Is this what it’s come to? Today the bottom line is that hookers get treated better.
It reminds me of the bumper sticker that union workers used to have on their trucks. It said, “Live better. Work union.” The new bumper sticker for women’s cars is “Live better. Hook.”
It also reminds me of something that I’ve been thinking about lately regarding living in two different realities at the same time. There is the feminist reality and the non-feminist reality. In the feminist reality, the one that I’m told that I live in, everything seems confusing and contradictory. In the non-feminist reality, the one that I’m told is my misogynistic fantasy, everything makes sense. So I have to pretend that I live in a feminist reality while living my life in the non-feminist reality.
Mega
Mallory’s discussion about the formation of NOW is also enlightening, I came across it in one of SSM’s blogs years ago. Perhaps we can forgive a bunch of pampered upper and upper middle class feminists their stupidity because of hashish, but I believe that Mallory was fortunate to have survived it with her sanity intact.
Roger,
You’re not crazy, it’s reality that’s nuts, at least feminist reality.