Category Archives: Gender

I Want to Be a Mom!

04 Thursday Feb 2016

Posted by in Gender

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I can clearly remember sitting in a circle in my second grade classroom (around 1977?) while we went around and answered the question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Even at that young age I knew the appropriate answers for a girl were either, “a teacher” or “a nurse.” And if like me you really wanted to score affirmation points, “President!”

(I actually didn’t want to be President, or a teacher, or a nurse…but somehow I knew those were the answers adults asking me that question were looking for.)

Some girls still would say, “wife” or “mom.” And when they did the teacher would look slightly disappointed and disapproving, and correct them. “No dear, the question is what do you want to BE when you grow up?”

This morning, my almost 5-year-old daughter was buzzing around, and she blurted out of nowhere, “When I grow up, I am going to be a mom!”

She stood there, with her big blue eyes, tousled blonde curls, peachy pink skin and cupid bow lips, just beaming with pride. Adorable!

My heart swelled up with joy, and I said, “You bet baby! That’s awesome! And I bet you are going to be the best momma EVER! That’s going to be so GREAT!”

And she giggled, and skipped off, happily dreaming of her future babies to be…

I’m so glad nobody has told my daughter yet that being a “mom” isn’t a legitimate endeavor. Because I think it is. In fact, I can hardly think of a more important job a woman could undertake — to guide, teach, and nurture the future.

Seems my second grade teacher had that (and a lot of other things!) all wrong!

Let those who have ears hear!

 

 

Men and Women: Two Halves of a Whole?

19 Friday Jun 2015

Posted by in Gender

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There is a concept in Chinese culture that has no real equivalent that I know of in the West, but it is a concept well worth pondering — yin and yang.

Yin and yang is difficult to really define because it can mean many things but in short it is like two parts making a whole, the up and the down, the left and the right, the night and day, the power of opposites attracting. Neither is better or worse, good or bad, right or wrong. They are separate but equal. And not only that, they need each other to be complete, balanced, whole.

In Western culture there is a more dualistic thought process, more like either/or. Something is either good or bad, either right or wrong, either up or down, either yes or no. There is no yin AND yang, it’s yin OR yang.

Dualistic thinking has its place, no doubt. However, as anything it also has its limitations. I believe a lot of the nonsense we have going on surrounding gender these days is related to the inability in our culture to see the strength, even necessity, of the yin and the yang.

Feminism, for example, seeks to bring gender to the middle, to encourage women to act more masculine and to encourage men to act more feminine. The obliteration of gender seems to be the ideal, the definition of equal. But is it?

Feminism also teaches that gender is a social construct, or in other words we are not born male or female, we are taught to be male or female. This implies that male and female are learned roles, not naturally inborn ones.

Well anyone who played peek a boo in preschool quickly learned that there are indeed differences between males and females. Feminists might say these differences are only physical. But are they?

An even deeper question is: are these differences bad? Good? Do they have to be either bad or good? Could they be both? Is minimizing or eliminating them the answer? Or is celebrating them?

Personally, I think it is a mistake to try and bring gender to the middle, to seek equality in the elimination of the yin yang element to gender. Androgyny? Blech.

I think women NEED men. I think men NEED women. I think men and women are attracted to each other because they are two parts of one whole.

Of course in today’s highly charged social, legal, and political climate, embracing the yin and yang concept of gender can be quite dangerous, costly, and damaging. The stakes are incredibly high. And they are currently tilted in (surprise!) the female interest. That’s why so many men are opting out, going their own way (mtgow.) And why so many women are wondering, where have all the good men gone? The good men understand full well the current sexual marketplace (smp) and marriage marketplace (mmp) and are just not willing to take the risk or have been burned badly already and are not willing to take the risk again. If I were a man, I can’t say I would not feel the same.

I vote we bring back women being women and men being men. The yin and yang version. Two halves of one whole, neither inferior or superior, different, but both equally necessary, each with their own strengths and weaknesses that just so happen to perfectly complement the strengths and weaknesses of the other. Imagine that!?! Viva la differance!

Let those who have ears hear.

Thank God Men Don’t Get PMS

14 Wednesday Jan 2015

Posted by in Gender, Relationships, Sex and Such

≈ 56 Comments

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I saw a comment on another red pill blog that explained perfectly a key difference between men and women. I wish I had copied it then so I could paste it here now, because it was beautiful and poetic and explained so well something we women live with on a daily basis but men do not: shifting hormones.

The post was from an older man to a younger one who had lost his girlfriend, right before the holidays. It sounded like hormones were involved. The older man explained women are not like men. Women are more like clouds, constantly shifting from day to day and even minute to minute thanks to our ever changing hormonal state starting in puberty and going through menopause.

Clouds. I thought it a good analogy. And he said it not in a negative or blaming way, no “hormones make women evil” stuff, he just schooled this younger man that that’s how women are, they can’t control it, that dealing with women meant dealing with this, and that for a man being ahead of the curve instead of caught off guard (keep a chart, maybe?) makes relationships go a whole lot smoother. (I will try to find the original post and quote it….but that is the much less poetic and profound cliff notes version.)

I was blown away by his understanding of something I don’t totally understand myself or acknowledge nearly as often as I should. I don’t know about you ladies, but even after 30 some years of month after month, my fluctuating hormones can still catch me off guard, especially right before “that time.” And there I will be, pissed, feeling like I want to throw a car across the yard, picking a fight with my man, feeling it with every fiber of my being, and then the next day – Whoops! Oooooh…so that’s why I was so upset.

Then I have to admit it and apologize. How embarrassing.

Before you fight with your boyfriend/fiancee/husband/spouse/FWB/insert term here, check the calendar. It might be your hormones, not him. Just sayin’!

To the men reading along, I wish we could control it but we cannot. God knows I have tried, and I am sure other women have too. We envy your logical, steady (constantly on) hormonal state. I can only hope that there is an upside to all our female hormone induced shape shifting. (Oh yeah, those same hormones give us curves!?!?)

Whatever it is, men and women and women and men can’t seem to leave each other alone for long, so there must be something about it that works. Right? Um yeah….trying to think positive here, ok? Making lemonade and all that.

Or maybe it’s all just a cruel joke. The jury is still out.

Let those who have ears hear.

Why Women Should Visit Mars (And How to Get There)

06 Tuesday Jan 2015

Posted by in Gender, Red Pill

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The first time I traveled outside of the United States, my eyes were opened to how  many of the things I took as universal truths, actually were not.

Going to China also gave me an understanding of it that I never could have gained any other way. Of course I did not understand China as well as a native Chinese and likely never could, but at least I actually experienced it firsthand and whether or not all of my impressions were correct, in less than one day I learned more about China than I had in my entire life.

In a similar way, I think more women should take a trip to Mars (aka the male world), if they really want to learn about men. Having visited Mars myself, I have discovered much of what I, and most women (aka Vesuvians), think about Martians (aka men) is simply downright inaccurate.

Instead, they only know Mars as it appears from Venus, or from what other Vesuvians (who have never been there either) have said about life on Mars.

So how can women visit Mars, see it for herself? Before it was nearly impossible, a totally closed off world. Luckily thanks to the Internet, it’s now possible. A good starter trip can be found by following the links posted at the end…but don’t go just yet.

Like any voyage to a foreign land, before clicking on them, I would urge Vesuvians to do so with an open mind, and to not judge that world by Venus standards, but rather try to experience it for itself. Right, wrong, or indifferent life on Mars is wildly different than life on Venus. You might be shocked, outraged, confused, and annoyed at first. “Why isn’t Mars like Venus? What the heck are they saying? This just doesn’t make any sense. OMG are you frickin’ kidding me?”

But if you can approach your journey with an open mind, almost like an archeological adventure, you will also find that the trip will open your eyes to a Mars you never knew existed, both more troubled and more wondrous than you ever could have imagined. Once you see it in person, you will never view Mars the same again.

Keep in mind, nothing is more annoying than a tourist who barges in and starts telling people they don’t understand their own culture or argues with them about their long held cultural norms. Those tourists will most likely only get ripped off and left stranded, and rightfully so. Remember: Mars is what it is.

But if you truly want to see the “real” Mars — the Mars most Vesuvian visitors will never, ever, ever see — try to observe for a long time first, soak it in, get your bearings. And then when you do start interacting with the natives remember you’re a guest, not a colonizer. It’s their world. Show lots of respect, be accepting despite the differences, don’t be easily offended, and seek to understand before you seek to be understood.

It’s not Venus. And it never will be. Wanting Mars to be like Venus would be like thinking China would be better if only it were exactly like America. (And some fellow American tourists, I was embarrassed to find in town after town, bellowed just that at the top of their lungs every chance they got the whole stinkin’ time. I wondered why they bothered to travel at all?) Sure, China isn’t perfect, but if we’re truly honest with ourselves neither is America (or wherever you live). China is in fact the oldest continuous civilization on earth. That didn’t happen because they “just don’t get it.”  Kinda like Mars. Visit if you dare, and tread lightly if you do. It’s a fascinating, fascinating place.

Note: The following links were kindly provided by a native to Mars, one of the first to reach out to me on my own maiden voyage, and a most trusted, knowledgeable, worthy, and able guide. When traveling, I find it’s always best to start with a local’s recommendations, then branch out from there. Think of it as a must see list. Unlike this blog from Venus to others on Venus, the blogs in this list are ones by Martians, for Martians.

Another hint, on Mars it’s not just about the destination itself, read on and discover what the commenters have to say in reaction to the host. That’s often where the good (and brace yourself — also often absolutely outrageously shocking from a Vesuvian point of view) stuff lies. Not everyone on Mars gets it, particularly about Venus, but be patient and I think you will find many of them do. And those ones want nothing more than to help Vesuvians truly, truly, truly understand life on Mars. Ignore the static, search for the signals. If you do, I guarantee you’ll find that some of the best people in the universe can be found on Mars!

Safe travels! And if you find yourself in trouble, tell them Red Pill Girl (aka Bloom) sent you. If you follow all of the the advice above, while they may not serve it up sugar coated on Mars, chances are there will be someone there to help with translation or point you in the right way. If you don’t follow the advice above, I can’t help you. You will deserve what you get. You have been warned.

And remember, it’s going to be a wild and crazy adventure. Chances are you’ll never see life on Venus, or Mars, the same again.

(Here is where I hug you and wish you all the best, look you sternly in the eye one last time, then say, “and sister — don’t make me regret ever sharing Mars with you!”)

Oh and one last thing, if you read something you don’t like (and you will) remember hate message, not the messenger.

Can a Woman Raise a Man?

07 Sunday Dec 2014

Posted by in Gender

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Comments about my recent post on “The Return of Masculinity” raised an interesting question,
Can a woman raise a man?”

Or in other words can a mom, especially a single mom, raise a son to be a man? Can she teach him what he needs to know as a man? Guide him in being a man?

I am a single mom, but I have two daughters, no sons. So while I cannot comment on mothering a boy as a single mom, I can comment firsthand on watching my mother try to do so.

My father survived Vietnam but tragically passed away in a car accident after his return. My mom was 27. I was 2. My brother was 4. Now this affected all of us in in profound ways, to be sure, but I have often thought perhaps it affected my brother most of all.

Someone said to him, shortly after, that he was now “the man of the house.” Why people say the things they do when people die I will never know, but I am not sure whether it was to inspire him, or somehow comfort him, but I think what it did, at the tender age of four, was terrify him. That’s a lot to put on a four-year-old.

My mother had no job skills so she went back to school and a wonderful lady, who lived nearby, whose own children were grown, and had lost her own husband a few months prior sought my mom out and offered to babysit us, everyday while she was in school, for free. She was such a blessing to us, this spunky short spitfire of a lady from Kansas, and she made a tough time easier on us all.

But back to my brother. He was a handful. I think while my mom denied her grief as her way to hold it together, he exploded in his. Add that to the fact that he already had ADHD, and now nobody to roughhouse with, or to push back on him, he literally did rule our roost. My exhausted mother placated him with candy and other bribes, just adding to his energy and escalating demands.

Everyone was afraid of my brother at school, and so I never wanted for protection. I was figuratively under his wing, even into my teen years once a guy heard my last name, he was backing away and bowing least he have to deal with my brother’s wrath.

But at home, he was out of control. I can see now he was acting out his pain, but at the time he was a tyrant. He spoke to my mother horribly, and as he got older he bullied her and intimidated her. He bullies me too, and could be very unkind, but while he regularly threatened to pound on me, he never actually did. The older he got, the worse it got.

He played sports and was in Scouts and here and there participated in men’s activities, but outside of that he lived in a world of women between our family, our sitter, and my mom’s friends.

I am told my father was brilliant, and his father as well. Geniuses, they say. My brother is also incredibly intelligent, but in school he was completely undisciplined, between the ADHD and the lack of any real structure or support with homework at home, his grades were abysmal compared to his potential. (my mom, bless her, was homecoming queen, but she is not an intellectual and could not really help my bother past a certain point. I am told I take after my father in temperament and brains, but my brother is far, far smarter than I am.)

One man who took my brother under his wing was his high school band teacher. My brother was a musical prodigy, he said, able to pick up and play pretty much any instrument you put in front of him. He played alto saxophone in the band, and mostly electric guitar for fun at home. He loved Heavy Metal and his heroes were the lead guitar players from these bands.

My bother liked his band teacher (who was also a foster parent) a lot, and he asked my mom when he was in his sophomore year if he could move to his house. My mom was horrified, and said no, but thinking back I wonder if that would not have been the best thing that could happen. I think my brother wanted, and needed, very much a man to guide him.

I am surprised he graduated high school, between the skipping classes, smoking pot, drinking alcohol, minor run ins with the law, and riding his dirt bike at full tilt. But he did, somehow. His grades were equally bad when he went to the local community college. When they dipped below the level for him to continue to get his VA benefits, my mom gave him a choice, join the military or move out on your own. (My father was active duty when he died and so both my brother and I got monthly checks for college under the GI Bill.)

He joined the Marines, not because of his grades but because of his scores on their intelligence tests. Unfortunately he told them he had never smoked pot or used drugs. On his way to boot camp, they asked him again. He again said no. Their background checks confirmed different and they told him, “Son had you been honest with us, we would have been ok with it. But since you ;lied, you cannot become a Marine son, good luck.” My brother had to call my mom collect, from a city four hours away, for a ride home.

The next week he went to the Navy recruiter, told the tale, and signed up. I didn’t think he would last ten minutes in the service, with his attitude toward authority, but instead he was like a duck in water. He thrived with the structure, and the discipline, and the limits. They noticed he liked to boss people, so they put him in charge. He worked on aviation electronics and computers. He served 8 years before he left the military for a career in civil service. Because he could instantly see all the ways to hack into a computer system, he was assigned to electronic security and helped keep hackers out of some of the most important government offices in Washington DC.

He recently left the DC area and has moved to be near my mother and I. He’s looking for a job and is doing well. He never married, has no children. He desperately wants a partner, but he has always been unlucky in love. He falls had and fast and scares the ladies off, as far as I can see.

Anyway, back to the point, my mom raised my brother, but as hard as she tried she could not be both a mom and a dad to him. I would say many if not most of his life struggles are all related to not having my father. From small things like not having someone to teach him how to pee standing up, to big things like how to talk to girls, he was on his own to figure it out. It was a lot for a little guy of four, and I think it’s still a lot today.

I could tell of other examples, men I have dated who were raised by single moms and how that affected them, but maybe another time. For now I will leave it with this one tale.

If you ask me, “Can a woman raise a man?” I would say, “No.” She can do her damn best, and be a good mom, but if that boy has a father who wants to be a part of his life, she should set any feelings of her own aside and make sure her son gets regular and frequent time with his dad. If like in my brother’s case, that’s not possible, the next best thing would be to get him around his male kin: grandpas, uncles, and such. Failing that, get him into a male organization and try to find a stable and long term man to be a part of his life (maybe a neighbor or family friend, not a romantic interest of mom unless he’s going to be around for life.)

To be clear, I am not saying a single mom can not do right being a GREAT mom to her son, but she cannot be his dad too. She needs to make sure her son is around a man, as above. It’s best for her, and him, and his future.

To do any less than make sure her boy is around men, a mother will unintentionally cripple her son no matter how much she loves him or how hard she works. It’s not because she isn’t doing enough, it’s just the way it is. Boys need men. Men make boys become men. Boys who become men (chronologically) without a man in their life may continue to struggle in life into adulthood.

That’s my two cents, anyway. Take it for what it is, one firsthand account.

Let those with ears hear.

The Return of Masculinity?

03 Wednesday Dec 2014

Posted by in Gender

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Last night at a meeting with my biz colleagues (mostly male) I noticed a curious fact, almost all of them were sporting noticeable facial stubble. Even the ones who are usually the clean cut sort.

Could it be masculinity is making a comeback? The manosphere is going mainstream? That’s it’s OK for men to be men again?

Sparta

Oh please, say it is so!

I am all for men being men, and unapologetically so. Enough with the yes mamn, whatever you say dear, hair product wearing, never breaking a sweat, hairless, androgynous guys who carry purses and say “it’s a satchel,” or worse admit it is a man purse. Enough. Just don’t.

Women (or moms) may say women like men to be like that, but really they don’t.

What do they like? Men being men. Men acting like men. Men dressing like men. Men smelling like men. (Good God, I can feel my eggs popping right now just thinking about this!)

The feminine craves the mas·cu·line: having qualities or appearance traditionally associated with men, especially strength and aggressiveness.

“he is outstandingly handsome and robust, very masculine”

synonyms: virile, macho, manly, muscular, muscly, strong, strapping, well built, rugged, robust, brawny, heavily built, powerful, red-blooded, vigorous; hunky, testosteronic

Yep. You heard it here first. Masculinity is back in style, at long last! (I hope!)

Of course there’s more to it than just being hairy, but it’s a good start.

What do you think ladies? Am I the only one thinking this?

 

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How Rites of Passage Help Us Grow Up

14 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by in Gender

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A post on another manosphere blog brought up the interesting idea that perhaps some of the problems encountered by men (and women) today are a result of not having defined rites of passage that mark the passage of childhood into manhood and womanhood.

As part of the “X” generation, I would have to agree that it’s not uncommon to see women and men in their 30s, 40s, 50s,m and even 60s largely living as they did in their late teens or early 20s. Grown women dressing in their teen daughter’s fashions, so-called “cougar” women prowling nightclubs for no-strings casual sex with men in their 20s, 40-something year old men still living like a college kid, or men buying red sports cars and dating women much younger are just a few examples of adults who seem to be having trouble “growing up.”

For women, rights of passage have largely been biological events tied to her fertility and ability to bear children. When a girl gets her first period, people often say, “she’s a woman now” even if she is only in her early teens. In the past, families might have publicly announced their daughters were “of age” by hosting a debutante or other event to indicate she was available for and seeking marriage.

For men, rites of passage usually include some sort of sequestering with older men in their family or community and physical, mental, and spiritual challenges that once passed, make him a “man.” In American culture, these often brutal (in women’s eyes) rites of passage have mostly been eliminated and many men report there is no moment when they can clearly feel they went from being a boy to being a man. Likewise, with more and more boys being raised by single mothers, many boys today don’t have regular contact with a male role model who can guide them in learning the skills to be a man.

In the message board discussion on men and rites of passage I thought it was interesting that the men insisted only men can teach a boy to be a man. At rites of passage ceremonies, only men are allowed because the activities that take place are so physically or emotionally challenging, women would likely try to intervene. However, these men insisted that for a boy to become a man, passing such tests was the best path to becoming a man.

Today’s youth have few rites of passage. For both men and women, losing one’s virginity is one. For men, killing their first deer or winning a major sporting event, or getting their first job might be the closest they have to male rites of passage. Many teens move out on their own, not really feeling like they are “men” or “women” yet.

A friend who is a therapist once told me that children getting their needs met in childhood and being part of a secure, loving home is the best way parents can prepare their children to move out and face the world fearlessly, expecting good things and success, while those children raised in dysfunctional or broken homes are more likely to feel unequipped and afraid to take this step and to cling to or long for a longer childhood.

Others have speculated that the baby boomer generation was the first American generation to resist growing up. Rather than to progress through the stages of life: child, teen, young wo/man, married adult, parent, empty nester, then grandparent — many boomers wanted to define their own path creating a culture of perpetual adolescence, the first “me” generation.

Perhaps it’s time to bring back rites of passage? And the concept that life does happen in stages, and that people should embrace each as they come and and then prepare to move on to the next stage and embrace that, each in turn, rather than to try to pretend they are in a different life stage than they are.

What do you think?

Exploring the Power of the Feminine

06 Thursday Nov 2014

Posted by in Gender

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As someone who grew up in a post-feminist world, I didn’t think much about many of the messages myself and other women were being told but just accepted them as truths, just like I accepted the sky was blue.

However now that I am older and starting to question these beliefs I think one place where feminism really threw the baby out with the bathwater was with the notion that feminine traits were weakness and to be avoided.

I now question if in one fell swoop that type of thinking actually weakened one of women’s most powerful sources of strength, her womanliness. And it reinforced that being a woman somehow was “less” and that women who want to be taken seriously should start acting like men and avoid acting like women.

There are many examples of this message, such as the power woman pantsuit (complete with shoulder pads to give the illusion one was a linebacker) favored by the career women of the 1980s who wanted to be “taken seriously.”

Women were discouraged from wearing dresses, make up, having long hair, and the androgynous, flat chested, straight waist figures of Twiggy and pre-pubescent looking models like her that followed were deemed “better” (by feminists) than  hourglass curves. To try to be or care about looking pretty was practically a crime and women who did retain feminine appearances were deemed bimbos or victims and all sorts of things.

But really, what’s “wrong” with being a woman? What’s wrong with being womanly? Wasn’t this supposed to be about choice? Why then was being a career woman in a traditionally male field suddenly the pinnacle of success while women who wanted to be mothers and homemakers were openly scorned as “less than?”

I find it interesting that men, on the other hand, (or most, anyway) didn’t seem to adopt a preference for women who acted like men. They by and large continued to prefer women being womanly. Perhaps in some weird way, this banishment of the feminine led to it almost becoming fetishized, only increasing the draw.

It’s kind of a silly story, but case in point. One time I showed up at a friend’s house party (I was about 35 or so) on Halloween but for some reason it didn’t dawn on me that it was a costume party. Everyone else was dressed up and there I was in a long sleeved t-shirt and jeans. So I dug through my friend’s closet, found a cowgirl hat and some boots, shoved two balloons in my shirt, and said I was dressed as a cowgirl with more money than sense, or in other words didn’t know when to stop when it came to breast implants. (I am medium chested naturally, but with the added balloons I was more in the Dolly Parton category.)

Everybody knew they were balloons and that it was a joke. But by golly, I was shocked to find myself the belle of the ball, even though there were gals there is sexier, skimpier, vampier costumes. Guys of all ages from their young 20s to their late 60s were tripping over themselves to fetch me a drink, open the door, and to just hover about. All night there was a circle of men around me, like moths to a flame (and yes, the gals were in a snit.) All because of two balloons stuffed under a plain long sleeved t-shirt. Wow. What?

(Interestingly, the attention didn’t seem sexual necessarily, harassing, creepy, or oppressive. It was more like admiration or adoration for lack of a better term. Like I was a goddess, or something.)

No, I didn’t go get breast implants, but that night was a very interesting lesson in the power of the feminine and the strong draw it has for the opposite power, the masculine.

So ladies, if you truly want to wear navy blue power suits, by all means. But if you are wearing them but secretly wish you could be a little more feminine but are afraid that if you do, that it will somehow diminish your power, let me argue you may just find the opposite.

If you don’t believe me, give it a try. And too bad I didn’t post this before Halloween, but if there’s ever an opportunity to put some balloons in your shirt and see what happens, as an experiment into the power of the feminine, go for it. I have a feeling you will be surprised at the results.

In short, it’s ok to be a woman. Being a woman or being womanly does not make you “less than” anything. Really. Women are great. Men are great. Men AND women can both be great. So be who you are. And if that is a feminine women (or not), by golly, go ahead!

Let those who have ears hear.

YOUR TURN: What do you think, dear readers? Do you think a woman dressing or acting feminine diminish her social power or standing? Or do you think a woman minimizing her femininity increases her odds of being taken more seriously?

Are Men and Women Different?

24 Wednesday Sep 2014

Posted by in Gender

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As I discussed in this post, some people seem very attached to the idea that men and women are the same and that we only act differently because we are taught to.

Are men and women different? Obviously, physically, yes. But I believe it goes much deeper than that and the time I have spent reading up in the manosphere has confirmed that – men and women think very differently from each other. Here’s a good post at a controversial, but eye opening, manosphere site on that very topic.

I can even see this while observing toddlers interact at my daughter’s preschool. At ages 2-5, it’s possible that these children have picked up some gender social cues but I think their behavior at this age is fairly uninfluenced.

The girls and boys interact and there are degrees of these behaviors from child to child but in short the boys are much more physically active, build things, stack blocks vertically into towers, interact with each other physically, change activities frequently, and in general roar about like little warriors.

The girls are more likely to sit and engage in quiet activities, enjoy imaginary role type games, play dress up, stack blocks horizontally, interact with each other verbally, and engage in more subdued activities.

Nobody tells them to do this, they just do it. All of the activities are open choice and there are no rules that the boys need to do this and the girls need to do that, they just do.

My theory is that a lot of the problems in the modern dating and relationship realm are caused by this misinformation that men and women are the same. That denying these differences makes men and women somehow more equal. Poppycock.

What it’s done is left women acting more like men and men acting more like women, a sort of coming to the middle that isn’t really working for either side.

What’s so wrong about admitting that men and women are different? That maybe they are two parts of a larger whole? And that it works best when women act like women and men act like men?

Oh wait I know, because that’s sexist. Or something. Okey dokey.

Ladies, if you want your relationship

Let those who have ears hear.

What Language Do They Speak on Mars?

11 Wednesday Jun 2014

Posted by in Fempire, Gender

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Ladies, do you ever feel like you are speaking French (or Vesuvius) and he is speaking German (or Martian) and there are no translators in sight?

The more I think about it, the profoundly different ways that the male and female mind work, likely create much of the strife in the battle between the sexes.

And if so, I am starting to realize that’s going to take a whole lot of patience, understanding, and hopefully a decent ability to play charades to make that work.

To complicate things further, each gender approaches the other more like they would like to be approached than how approach actually works for the opposite sex.

And then there are on top of that, lots of other problems, including a totally topsy-turvey sexual market place (smp) and marriage market place (mmp) that resembles the wild-wild west.

If any of you know how all that works, please share it in the comments, because I personally am stumped!

But I think it’s in everybody’s best interest to get it figured out. Or if not that, at least back up on all four wheels, ok maybe three good wheels and a partial flat, something better than this anyway.

Let those who have ears hear.