• About

Notes From a Red Pill Girl

~ A site for women interested in a red pill perspective (where men are welcome too!)

Notes From a Red Pill Girl

Tag Archives: achievement

Be Thankful

22 Thursday Nov 2018

Posted by redpillgirlnotes in Red Pill

≈ 61 Comments

Tags

abundance, achievement, contentment, entitlement, feminimity, feminism, fulfillment, gratitude, happiness, keeping up with the Jonses, red pill, success, thankfulness

It seems like an apt time of year to ponder gratitude.

True thankfulness is exceedingly rare in today’s entitled “gimmie, gimme NOW” world.

I find it so ironic that in an era where many have more material and physical abundance than perhaps ever before in all of history, it’s much more common to encounter people thinking they need more than to meet those who appreciate all they’ve got.

And since this blog is for the ladies, I will focus on this from the female perspective from here. (Perhaps a male blogger can tackle a version of this topic for the guys.)

For women, who have for decades been raised to believe there are no limits, they can be or do anything they want to be, that they deserve it all, and that they don’t just deserve it they are OWED it, contentment and gratitude can be viewed as negative, limiting, and outdated.

However I would argue it’s only those rare women who cultivate a true gratitude attitude that ever find the seemingly-ever-elusive happiness, fulfillment, balance, peace, and abundance so many desperately seek.

The answer ironically isn’t having more, it’s not just being OK with — but actually being thankful for — less.

Now before you think I am advising gals need to aim low or give up, give me a chance to explain.

Contentment and gratitude for what *is* truly is the secret to ever having enough. Because everything is relative.

For example, for some people an 800 square foot house is “small.” For others a 2,500 square foot house is “small.” Any house could be viewed as too small, too big, or just right based on one’s perception.

I once read a book by a woman who suddenly realized one day that the problem wasn’t that’s her house was too small, it was her attitude toward it that was. Rather than being thankful for and loving the house she had, she resented it for everything it was not, and spent many disgruntled hours wishing to live anywhere but there.

After that “ah ha moment,” she embarked on a year-long quest to love her home with all she had. She lovingly took stock and then went to work making it as beautiful, comfortable, welcoming, and cozy as it could possibly be.

Soon others began to notice her modest little house. Editors from home and garden magazines that she used to read with envy started calling her, asking to feature her home! Then offering her a regular column! Then encouraging her to write books about how she had created her lovely abode.

That’s the difference gratitude makes. It was the same house. She was the same person. All that had changed was rather than wishing for something else she embraced what she had and poured her heart and soul into loving it just as it was while doing all she could to make it all it could be with the resources she had.

In the end embracing gratitude led to so much more than not doing so ever did. She wasn’t settling. Or aiming low. Or giving up. Or getting less.

In fact had she stayed on the path of wanting more, she would likely still be stuck right there, bitterly hating her little house, wishing for something else, thinking, “if only…”

Instead she was loving her house, living a life beyond her wildest dreams, and embracing the ever growing abundance with a humble and thankful heart.

If you find yourself often thinking about what you wish you had, were, missed, or should be, try looking at what you have right now with gratitude, knowing it’s enough, being thankful for exactly what you’ve got, making the most of it, and embracing the blessings that have been right there all along. At home, at work, at play, and in love.

Happy Thanksgiving! May it be a blessed one.

What do you think? Please share in the comments!

Most Problems Are User Error

19 Thursday Feb 2015

Posted by redpillgirlnotes in Red Pill

≈ 44 Comments

Tags

abundance, achievement, best life, break up, break ups, breakups, dating, divorce, goals, happiness, health, heartbreak, highest life, lack, loss, marriage, positive thinking, quitting smoking, red pill, relationships, sadness, sexism, struggle, success, weight loss

Someone* once said to me, “Most problems are caused by user error,” meaning many of the struggles in life are self-created ones.

Realizing this can be a double edged sword. On one hand it is empowering — to struggle or not in most cases becomes a choice. On the other hand, it requires taking responsibility for your life outcome, owning that you are the cause of your problem.

Try it. Make a written or mental list of your biggest problems and struggles. Then ask yourself how many of them are actually caused by your own decisions and choices, or decisions or choices you should/could be making but aren’t?

It can be both painful and liberating to realize nearly all factors in life are within our own control. That life is, like it or not, good or bad, what we have made it.

Sure, there are exceptions, times when circumstances beyond one’s control impose suffering — like being born into a dysfunctional family, getting cancer, losing everything in a fire or natural disaster, being laid off due to a downsizing, having a partner dying or walk out with no warning, being caught up in a war zone.

But even in these cases, there is still a choice involved and that choice is how you respond to factors out of your control. Constructive or destructive, how you react to tragedy is still a choice completely within your control. (Understanding this is what heroes and inspirational souls are made of.)

Luckily, true tragedy beyond control doesn’t strike often in life. Most of the time there is no outside random situation or circumstance imposing the suffering. Upon examination, we are usually creating the situation ourselves with the choices large and small we make every day. In these cases it’s as simple — and as hard — as choosing to do different.

Pity parties, blaming others, or adopting a victim stance may soothe the ego, but they only prolong the suffering.

Start doing yourself a favor, if you have been falling prey to user error forgive yourself (we’re all human), then take ownership of your life, identify the user error that’s causing you (and very likely others) suffering, and take action to change the situation from what you don’t want into what you do want.

Whatever the issue, problem, struggle, or roadblock — from weight loss, to a career funk, to relationship woes, to money problems — it’s almost always just that simple, and just that difficult. Choices. Action. Not choosing. Not taking action. A good attitude. A bad attitude.

And the good news, or the bad news, is the only person who can do it, or keep yourself from doing it, is you.

Let those who have ears hear.

—————-

*The someone who said this, ironically, knew this because they themselves were an expert at user error.

Subscribe

  • Entries (RSS)
  • Comments (RSS)

Archives

  • November 2020
  • October 2020
  • August 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014

Categories

  • Faith
  • Fempire
  • Gender
  • parenting
  • Red Pill
  • Relationships
  • Sex and Such
  • Uncategorized

Meta

  • Register
  • Log in

Blog at WordPress.com.

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
  • Follow Following
    • Notes From a Red Pill Girl
    • Join 929 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Notes From a Red Pill Girl
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar