Tag Archives: beta

Why Can’t We All Just Be Honest?

14 Monday May 2018

Posted by in Relationships

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I bumped into my former neighbor Vixen this weekend and she got me caught up on her love life latest. Not much has changed is the short story.

As she described things, how being torn between the nice guy who is there for her and the bad boy who isn’t, I realized she is a living example of the AF/bb model.

So I explained the theory to her, that some say for most of the month women seek comfort, security, and good guy qualities. But during the ovulation window they might go for the bad boy type. And how women seem to want both, steady Eddie and Harley McBaddy.

Her eyes lit up. “Exactly!” She said. “Why can’t that be ok? Why can’t we all just be honest about it?”

It was a question I couldn’t answer, not being a guy myself, but based on what I have observed it never seems to work out that way.

Perhaps in years past women like Vixen still would have sought this dual mating strategy, but rather than try to openly live it out as women do today, they would have kept things far more covert.

And maybe there in lies the rub — in pushing for the ability to openly pursue a dual mating strategy women have in turn dismantled its underpinnings. Not that an AF/bb strategy was ever very stable but it seems it was far more so under wraps than out in the open.

And it makes sense. Why would the guys go along?

Granted, I am not saying every woman runs around three days a month. Then or now. Hardly. But even those who don’t may feel temptation stronger at certain times of the month than others, especially in her reproductive age years, and if so it’s likely this dynamic at play.

Women openly pursuing this strategy today seem to end up baby mommas. And that likely is the natural outcome.

In any case I found Vixen’s question interesting. The answers I think, are a whole lot more complex.

What do you think? Please share in the comments.

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Alpha or beta?

18 Thursday Feb 2016

Posted by in Red Pill

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In the fine tradition of Red Pill shiv master Chateau Heartiste, today we will play a little game called Alpha or beta?

The idea is to access, from subtle body language tells in photos, if a guy is Alpha or beta.

Today’s candidate comes to us via frequent commenter Ton, who shared a news article on the Alpha/beta handing out a flower to each and every girl (900 of them) in his high school for Valentine’s Day.

Ton writes:

“Here’s a guy who will never be laid; maybe he should pack up and move to that yankee city with the platonic cuddle clubs.”

So, like the girl I am, I immediately visited the Alpha/beta’s Facebook page to snoop and found some photos of him and the ladies. From this, I am not so sure his grand gesture has not made him a hypergamy target in the small fickle pond that is his high school. (Utah, need I say more?)

I replied:

“@ Ton I dunno, rose boy seems to have a blonde hottie admirer, click thru to his Facebook!”

In typical Ton fashion, he replies:

“As if likes of FaceBook etc equals being balls deep in said hottie?”

So, dear readers, let’s have a look. What do you think — Alpha or beta? Let us know in the comments, and why you think so.

AlphaBeta

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AlphaBeta3

AlphaBeta5

And with his previous girlfriend (also a looker, I’d say. Possibly blondie before coloring her hair, although to me blondie looks to be a natural blond? Hard to say.)

AlphaBeta6

 

What do YOU think, my friends? Alpha or beta?

 

 

Beware Self-Imposed Drama

21 Tuesday Jul 2015

Posted by in Red Pill

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As I listened to my former neighbor describe her continually messed up love life, it suddenly occurred to me how she was really the one creating all this angst.

Now if you asked her, she’d swear up and down that she’s the victim here, “they” are doing all this to her.

For a long time I bought it too. After all she’s so convincing in her blameless tales of woe. I used to empathize with her bad luck. But post red pill awareness, it’s abundantly clear that she’s an active participant in creating all of her troubles.

For example if ever there has been a plate spinner, it’s her. She’s always got two or three guys she “can’t decide between” on the line, then rotates in a few random encounters here and there to boot.

Naturally, the men in these tales are not so into that, and drama ensues. Oddly (or according to the red pill maybe not oddly at all) the only one who she has it bad for is the one who blows her off and who seems to care less what she’s doing as long as she’s available when he wants her. Which is about every three months.

I hate to say it but she pretty much confirms almost every red pill cliche in the book: AF/BB, opportunistic love, bad boys over good guys, etc.

How does she get away with it? Well for now she’s still young(ish) and very attractive. I fear someday she will be the 50-some lady sitting at the bar wondering where have all the good men gone?

And if that happens, I suppose she’ll have nobody but herself and her disastrous self-sabotaging choices to blame.

Or maybe by then she’ll be reaping the seeds she’s planted when her own two daughters she’s dragged along for the ride become teens and start creating self-imposed drama themselves? I sure hope not.

Lately when she starts talking about all her troubles, I have been dropping in tidbits of red pill wisdom. She actually latches on to these little nuggets, surprisingly, and is quite interested. Which leads me to believe she’s really not that conscious of the self-destructive, no-win cycle she is creating, or how to break out of it. Hopefully in time that light will click on. In the meantime, she seems to be giving the Kardashian’s a run for their money in the drama department.

Here’s an idea: When tempted to indulge in something you know you should not, try asking yourself my go-to drama busting question, “Isn’t my life already complicated enough?” Chances are it is, all on its own. No additional drama necessary!

Let those who have ears hear.

Examples of the Red Pill in Movies or Music?

26 Thursday Feb 2015

Posted by in Red Pill

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Since stumbling across the red pill philosophy, I find examples of its various theories all the time in music lyrics and sometimes in movies.

How about you?

This is another interactive reader post, I am hoping that you will share examples of red pill music (lyrics, links to videos, etc) or movies here in the comments.

Probably the most red pill movie I have seen would be “The Hangover.” It is absolutely filled with great examples of all sorts of red pill tenants, plus its pretty funny, if you like sick humor like I do.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1119646/

As for red pill songs, there are so many. I will list them as I think of them in the comments.

Please, chime in!

What We Can Learn From 50 Shades of Grey

17 Tuesday Feb 2015

Posted by in Relationships, Sex and Such

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Like it or not, the book and now movie 50 Shades of Grey has been a smashing financial success. The book has sold more copies than Harry Potter, the movie grossed over $81 million this past opening weekend. And all this despite nearly everyone who critiqued the book saying it was pretty terribly written. (I have not read the book or seen the movie.)

Whether you are in the love it or hate it camp, there is no denying this book and then film hit a raw nerve in a big, big way. So why has it been so successful? What is it that has people (errr, I mean women) buying the books and flocking to the theaters in droves?

Well, for one thing it’s about sex. And as they say, sex sells. More than that it’s about a sexual relationship where the male partner is dominant and the female partner is submissive.

This isn’t the soft, gentle, wrapped in romance style sex that most men and women have been sold as “the way it works.” It’s not roses and chocolates and hopes that with a foot rub and some choreplay there *might* be some sex in return for Mr. Grey, if he’s lucky.

But wait, that’s what women want, right? Isn’t that how it works?

Actually not, as I think the success of this book and movie clearly show. Those familiar with the Red Pill shouldn’t be surprised by this information. Manospherians recognized this dynamic long ago and have built an entire philosophy of seduction and tripping a woman’s attraction wires around it.

What the Red Pill says, among other things, is that women and men are not the same. Gender is not a social construct. Men and women are different.

Yet over the past 40 years a “same and equal” philosophy that women want men to act more like women and men want women who act more like men has been pushed by the larger culture, often called the Blue Pill, much to the dissatisfaction of all.

Not to be crude but what do women like about men? They are hard. What do men like about women? They are soft. What doesn’t work? Soft men and hard women.

I am not saying everyone needs to go get whips and handcuffs to be sexually happy (but if it floats your boat, go for it). What I am saying is that the feminized man and the masculine woman dynamic doesn’t work.

But God forbid you say it out loud because THAT’S JUST NOT OK. It’s misogyny. It’s sexist. It’s abusive. It’s oppressive. It’s patriarchy. Etc.

To that I simply say, it wasn’t men buying these books and movie tickets for the most part, now was it? So who exactly is so titillated by the idea of a man calling the shots? Hummm?

Female sexuality has a side that few women want to admit to but Harlequin romance novel writers, female erotica writers, and the author of 50 Shades all reveal loud and clear. Women aren’t the delicate little asexual fainting flowers the Victorians portrayed them to be.

So why are we as a culture (and in many ways especially women) working so hard to deny that? I think a lot of marriages and relationships could be greatly improved by putting aside the prudish Blue Pill thinking and embracing the Red Pill reality the runaway success of 50 Shades makes abundantly clear.

Hopefully more women, and men, will be awakened to how it works — and how it has always worked — because of it.

Exhibit A…

“He moves suddenly so that his hand is cupping my sex, and one of his fingers sinks slowly into me. His other arm holds me firmly in place around my waist.

“This is mine,” he whispers aggressively. “All mine. Do you understand?” He eases his finger in and out as he gazes down at me, gauging my reaction, his eyes burning.

“Yes, yours…”

Abruptly, he moves, doing several things at once: Withdrawing his fingers, leaving me wanting, unzipping his fly, and pushing me down onto the couch so he’s lying on top of me.

“Hands on your head,” he commands through gritted teeth as he kneels up, forcing my legs wider…

“We don’t have long. This will be quick, and it’s for me, not you. Do you understand?

Don’t come, or I will spank you,” he says through clenched teeth.”

~ E.L. James

That text didn’t sweep through suburbia faster than the latest measles outbreak for nothing. And it wasn’t men who were telling their friends about it, it was women.

What does that say?

Let those who have ears hear.

Why Do We Follow The Herd?

21 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by in Red Pill

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You might remember as a kid hearing your mom say something along the lines of, “Just because everyone else jumps off a cliff, that doesn’t mean you have to, too.”

And yet, it’s hard to deny that there’s a powerful pressure to run with the pack if you want to fit in. People (and some would say especially women) care a great deal about how others think of them.

In this insightful essay about the hierarchy of the herd, the author explores why this is and how this herd mentality drives social norms, movements, and individual behavior more than we may consciously realize.

One thing the red pill philosophy encourages is to question everything you think you know is true. And when you do, before long chances are you’ll come to the very uncomfortable realization that a lot of what you thought was true actually isn’t. And that a lot of the thoughts and decisions you thought were your own, aren’t.

It can be such an uncomfortable experience that many would rather deny, deny, deny than face the truth. Even if what they are doing isn’t working. Even if what they are doing will never work.

As the above essay points out, there can also be stiff penalties for not following, speaking out against, or going against the herd.  Even when the herd is headed right toward a cliff.

For example, I would argue that the herd is currently headed (stampeding, really)  in a very dangerous direction. The herd is destabilizing, derailing, and destroying much of what made our society work, relationships and marriages work, families work, our economy work, our government work, our schools work, western civilization work.

Look around. Examples of this are everywhere. (This next part is admittedly America-centric but I am an American woman so it is what I know.) In a country where people have experienced unparalleled prosperity and freedom, we are instead of rising to the top, racing to the bottom. Why? The herd.

Mark my words, there is a cliff straight ahead. Whether you believe me or not, the law of gravity applies just the same.

Let those who have ears hear.

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But that’s just what I think. What do you think? Are things getting better, or worse? Why or why not?

Do Women Prefer Bad Boys?

25 Thursday Sep 2014

Posted by in Relationships

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A post by a fellow male blogger on women and bad boys has me thinking, do women really prefer bad boys? And if so, why?

If you haven’t read the linked to blog above, I highly recommend it as the rest of this post will make a lot more sense if you do.

I think the author is right about the primal draw of the bad boy, historically. Not so long ago, dinner didn’t come from the store and civil unrest was a fact of life. Birth control was also non existent, so sex = babies, and babies = a woman’s ability to take care of it all herself is highly compromised. Hunt or fight off foes with a howling baby (or several) in tow while taking breaks to nurse and clean up poopy butts? I don’t think so.

Back then woman needed man much more than man needed woman. (And some would argue this is true even today, and I might agree.) And preferably woman needed a man who could hunt and protect her and their children. Enter the bad boy meme.

Now back then he wasn’t so much a bad boy as probably an average guy. Perhaps there were a few shaman types who stayed back at camp and practiced medicine and led spiritual rituals but for the most part all the other men were hunters, warriors, and laborers. And likely all three. That was the “job” of a man.

Women had babies, took care of children and the elderly, cooked and prepared food, made clothing, kept up the camp, packed up and moved the camp, gathered plants and roots, and so on. That was the “job” of the woman.

Then agriculture happened, then industrialization, then specialization. Somewhere in there came money, and the disconnect from every man and woman being self sufficient but part of a larger whole, using money earned at a job to barter for goods needed to survive.

Today’s accountant (no offense to accountants, just picked a random job to illustrate) doesn’t hunt to put food on the table or fight off foes and perhaps even hires out his labor like yard work, building, and fixing things. The accountant understands money, and earns money, and so can provide and protect in today’s society. But what if society collapsed? How well would the average accountant do?

And thus, my theory is, creates the appeal of the bad boy. If shtf, I think women still understand in a primal and ancient way that the bad boy is going to be able to provide and protect. The bad boy isn’t worried about the ethics of doing what needs done. The bad boy isn’t going to shun violence, or have issues with killing animals to eat, or even lose sleep over stealing from someone else if he has to.

So who is the better bet? Logically, it’s the accountant. Instinctively, it’s the bad boy.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not advocating women start corresponding with dangerous felons or even choosing an unemployed thug over a gainfully employed accountant. I am just saying, if you find yourself drawn to the bad boy, this is probably why.

Ideally a gal can cover her bases by seeking a gainfully employed guy with good character who is solid and true, but also has a bad boy edge and could do what it takes if he had to.

And guys, if you are more the accountant than the bad boy, don’t be afraid to let your inner caveman out to play. Hunt. Fish. Climb rocks. Shoot guns. Raise and slaughter chickens. Play sports. Build fires. Brew beer. Howl at the moon. Hit stuff with sticks. Throw rocks. Be stinky and dirty every now and then. Let your beard get scruffy occasionally. Get back in touch with your neanderthal side. Chicks dig it. Even if your mom told you they don’t!

Let those who have ears hear.