Tag Archives: women

Taboo Talk

27 Thursday Oct 2016

Posted by in Red Pill

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It is interesting to me what a to-do people are making about some of the things Trump has said, while at the same time the book 50 Shades of Grey outsold Harry Potter (!) without any marketing or advertising beyond whispered word of mouth. And it was filled with lots and lots of taboo talk!

Some of the latest dialog being quoted was said about a contestant on his reality show, a former Playboy centerfold and Playmate of the Year.

While people are up in arms, I find it interesting that the woman he said these things about and to was not in the least offended by them. And she thinks highly of the man. She seems to “get it” that of course he felt that way (duh!), and she took his saying so not as an insult but as a compliment and as lighthearted teasing said jokingly. They both seemed to get it was just talk.

When I was younger, I would get very uncomfortable about men saying things about my body or my sexuality unsolicited. I get that such language, if not said jokingly, can be scary. Such things said in a different tone would in fact be crossing a line.

But I think we have gone too far, where even innocuous admiration of the female form has become weaponized. Men like looking at pretty women. It’s that simple. Even married men like looking at pretty women.

Something I learned in the manosphere is that men are looking at women all the time, way more than we realize. One man described how it’s almost automatic for him to size up every female he comes across (“She’s a 2, there’s a 7, that one is a 6, etc.”) It’s just something his mind automatically did, and other men admitted theirs did too, and that it wasn’t pervy or leering. It’s the way the male mind works. Visual. Very visual.

And maybe we should all just get over it.

For example, awhile ago my vacuum cleaner hose got a toy lodged in it. So knowing the guy who owns the local country store is handy, and needing the vacuum fixed asap, I headed over to see if he could help me out. He’s likely nearly 60, married, super nice guy, blue collar, former truck driver.

He was sitting there with my neighbor, an elderly bachelor farmer in his late 70s, and they were shooting the breeze. They were happy to help me with my dilemma and soon got the toy dislodged.

I thanked them and turned to walk back home. I heard the farmer comment about being happy to help, “in exchange for the nice view.” And yes, he meant my backside. The store owner laughed good-heartedly, in a “I was thinking it, but he actually said it out loud” kind of way.

My reaction? I added a little extra shimmy to my walk, and carried on my way, with a smile on my face, knowing they meant it as a compliment, and feeling kinda good that they noticed.

It wasn’t awkward. It wasn’t sleazy. It wasn’t uncomfortable. It was life.

Now I know this pales in comparison to what Trump said to and about the contestant, but I have had men say similar things as what he said to me, too. And they said it lighthearted and joking, and I knew and they knew it was just talk. And the few times it wasn’t, I made it known I wouldn’t have it. End of.

Much ado about nothing, I say. I’d much rather see fair, balanced investigative journalistic news stories comparing the candidates views on the issues that really matter to the American people, rather than see “reporters”wasting ink on such tabloid fodder.

 

 

 

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Eating Crow Isn’t Tasty

22 Tuesday Mar 2016

Posted by in Red Pill

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Today I’d like to share a story to help illustrate a point. I’ll get to what the point is later, but first the story…

When I was 26 or so, I had the amazing opportunity to travel to China and Hong Kong with my uncle, who is Chinese, born in China, raised in Hong Kong, educated in the US, and married to my mom’s sister.

He is my favorite uncle, and I am so blessed to have him in my life and world. Thanks to him I have been exposed to a wonderful and beautiful culture I never would have seen otherwise. The Chinese culture is the oldest continuous surviving culture on earth, and radically different from our own. Thanks to him, I have had a “translator” to help me understand the origins of these differences, which I am sure otherwise would seem quite baffling. (The culture is group based, conformity based, community based, and many other things rarely if ever found in American culture which prizes the individual over the group.)

The Chinese are also, thank Goodness, infinitely polite and ever patient. My uncle must sometimes just cringe in amazement at his American niece (very much a proud and loud independent feminist minded female at the time).

But back to the story. So I got to go on this trip. My Uncle’s oldest brother was also there, he met us there (he’s a longtime resident of New Zealand where he settled after college.) We also saw and met many other family members along the way, including a sister in Beijing, a sister in Hong Kong, a sister visiting Hong Kong from Maryland, their mother, uncle, and aunt all in Hong Kong, and various other cousins and distant clan.

There were banquets and feasts and touring and a trip on a boat down the Yangtze (pre-dam) and all sorts of amazing, amazing things. A trip of a lifetime.

While in Bejing we toured the Imperial Palace, home to the former Emperors of China, and a just amazing, must-see place. It is HUGE, and goes from large public spaces, to mid sized official spaces, to private residence spaces, to the most intimate spaces only the Emperor, his servants, and his wives saw.

Anyway most of the trip my uncle and his brother did all the talking, planning, and navigation. My uncle was so young when his family fled the communist takeover of China that he only speaks Cantonese, the language of Hong Kong. His older brother, eight at the time they fled, speaks both Cantonese and Mandarin, the language of mainland China. Hong Kong and China are vastly different places, cultures, and such — truly fascinating. Especially then, when China was just opening to the West and Hong Kong had just reverted to Chinese rule from Birttish.

But again, back to the story. After spending an entire day touring and walking from the front gates of the palace to the exit at the rear, we were all anxious to get something to eat and get back to our hotel. Cab drivers were waiting right outside the gate, very boldly approaching groups and seeking riders. I for some reason decided to take charge. I choose the cab driver, my uncle and his brother (my uncles really) looked at each other with a knowing look, agreed, and we got in. I felt so proud of my independence and my ability to make my way in the world as a fierce and fearless female!

When we got to our destination, the driver informed my uncles the price was significantly higher than promised. You see he was not an official cab driver with an agreed to fare and government backed policies, but a hustler, and thanks to me we were in his clutches. My uncles quickly paid the higher fare with little arguement. Problem solved! Or so I thought.

Later that evening they very nicely and patiently informed me I owed them for the additional fare, as after all the cab was my choice, so it was only fair. Cringe. They were right and I knew it, so I forked over the $40 or so extra, which at the time was a big part of my “spending money” for the trip.

They taught me something without ever saying a word and it was this — I should have trusted them to lead the way and make the decisions rather than try (demand) to foolishly “prove” myself their equal.

Eating crow is never a fun thing. But I took my lumps and choked it down without complaint. And I learned something that day — men know a lot more than we women often give them credit for.  Listening and looking to them for guidance can be a wise strategy, but takes a humble and dare I say submissive frame of mind to yield, but it’s a lot better than eating crow. Try it sometime!

Or you can get used to saying, “Mmmmm, crow….yummy!”

What do you think? Please share in the comments!Eating crow

(And for a good look at the Imperial Palace, the movie “The Last Emperor” shows it well, and tells the story of how China became a communist country, as well. Excellent watching!)

 

 

 

 

Because Things Don’t Build Themselves, Sista!

03 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by in Red Pill

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Have you ever stopped to think about how all those roads you drive on everyday, and the electricity you rely on, and the operational phone and cell phone system, and those buildings, and microwaves, and bridges and even hairdryers were built? And who built them?

Men. Yep. By and large, men built them! Men who had conceived of, designed, created, and then produced and sold them. Truth is, those “misogynistic, bumbling, no good” men build civilization, and protect it, and keep it rolling along.

Now I am not saying women don’t do their part, and yes men are not having babies, but those are hairs we aren’t splitting here.

So what would happen to a world without men? Or a world where men have so given up on women that they just don’t care to build things, or fix them, or design them, or produce them anymore? Exactly how long until the toilets were overflowing, and the power was out, and a fire was raging, food supplies were gone, much less makeup or high heels, and there was mayhem in the streets? Yep. Not long. Not long at all.

I don’t know about you, sister, but I really can’t build things much past a pre-drilled, pre-assembled, all parts included kit — if that. I’d be lucky to get some curtain rods up if civilization ended.

“Educate yourself,” you may be saying. I have tried. I took woodworking class, and autoshop, and what I learned is that me and tools don’t mix very well.

In the years since I have also realized things don’t build themselves. They don’t build themselves at my house, they don’t build themselves in my town, they don’t build themselves in my state, and so on…

Men build things. Women need men to build things. Women need men to care about women so they will build things. All good reasons to be nice to men, show some appreciation, respect, and gratitude.

I know when I drive by a road construction crew these days I notice them — men. Men working hard. Men making civilization work. In all kinds of weather. In every season. Every day of the year.

To many women, men are invisible. Until their car breaks, or the cabinet drawer comes off the rail, or she can’t open that jar of pickles. She just assumes he will be there. But what if he wasn’t?

Men are actually a huge asset to our society. It might do us better to treat them as such. Because without men, things start to roll backwards, sometimes pretty darn quick.

So be good to the men in your life — we women need them, and their willingness and goodwill, to keep it all going and flowing and working.

Ooooom……consider it. Mind blowing, isn’t it?

Where would we be without men?

I hope we never have to find out.

Maybe They Are Wrong?

11 Saturday Apr 2015

Posted by in Relationships

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Have you ever stopped to ponder that maybe all the “modern day” relationship advice might be all wrong?

Conventional wisdom tells women to put off marriage and family until she finishes her education, establishes her career. Be a strong independent woman!

Likewise young men are told to be gentle, sensitive, supplicating. Be “nice” they are told. Don’t “play the field.” Stop acting “like a brutish man.”

What if it’s all projection? What if what women really want are strong independent men who know about the ways of women, and what men really want are gentle and nice women who want to get married young?

Wouldn’t that be ironic? That men are acting like they wish women would and women are acting like they wish men would?

What do you think, could it be? Could we have it backwards? Or is the modern way better?

Why Women Should Visit Mars (And How to Get There)

06 Tuesday Jan 2015

Posted by in Gender, Red Pill

≈ 165 Comments

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The first time I traveled outside of the United States, my eyes were opened to how  many of the things I took as universal truths, actually were not.

Going to China also gave me an understanding of it that I never could have gained any other way. Of course I did not understand China as well as a native Chinese and likely never could, but at least I actually experienced it firsthand and whether or not all of my impressions were correct, in less than one day I learned more about China than I had in my entire life.

In a similar way, I think more women should take a trip to Mars (aka the male world), if they really want to learn about men. Having visited Mars myself, I have discovered much of what I, and most women (aka Vesuvians), think about Martians (aka men) is simply downright inaccurate.

Instead, they only know Mars as it appears from Venus, or from what other Vesuvians (who have never been there either) have said about life on Mars.

So how can women visit Mars, see it for herself? Before it was nearly impossible, a totally closed off world. Luckily thanks to the Internet, it’s now possible. A good starter trip can be found by following the links posted at the end…but don’t go just yet.

Like any voyage to a foreign land, before clicking on them, I would urge Vesuvians to do so with an open mind, and to not judge that world by Venus standards, but rather try to experience it for itself. Right, wrong, or indifferent life on Mars is wildly different than life on Venus. You might be shocked, outraged, confused, and annoyed at first. “Why isn’t Mars like Venus? What the heck are they saying? This just doesn’t make any sense. OMG are you frickin’ kidding me?”

But if you can approach your journey with an open mind, almost like an archeological adventure, you will also find that the trip will open your eyes to a Mars you never knew existed, both more troubled and more wondrous than you ever could have imagined. Once you see it in person, you will never view Mars the same again.

Keep in mind, nothing is more annoying than a tourist who barges in and starts telling people they don’t understand their own culture or argues with them about their long held cultural norms. Those tourists will most likely only get ripped off and left stranded, and rightfully so. Remember: Mars is what it is.

But if you truly want to see the “real” Mars — the Mars most Vesuvian visitors will never, ever, ever see — try to observe for a long time first, soak it in, get your bearings. And then when you do start interacting with the natives remember you’re a guest, not a colonizer. It’s their world. Show lots of respect, be accepting despite the differences, don’t be easily offended, and seek to understand before you seek to be understood.

It’s not Venus. And it never will be. Wanting Mars to be like Venus would be like thinking China would be better if only it were exactly like America. (And some fellow American tourists, I was embarrassed to find in town after town, bellowed just that at the top of their lungs every chance they got the whole stinkin’ time. I wondered why they bothered to travel at all?) Sure, China isn’t perfect, but if we’re truly honest with ourselves neither is America (or wherever you live). China is in fact the oldest continuous civilization on earth. That didn’t happen because they “just don’t get it.”  Kinda like Mars. Visit if you dare, and tread lightly if you do. It’s a fascinating, fascinating place.

Note: The following links were kindly provided by a native to Mars, one of the first to reach out to me on my own maiden voyage, and a most trusted, knowledgeable, worthy, and able guide. When traveling, I find it’s always best to start with a local’s recommendations, then branch out from there. Think of it as a must see list. Unlike this blog from Venus to others on Venus, the blogs in this list are ones by Martians, for Martians.

Another hint, on Mars it’s not just about the destination itself, read on and discover what the commenters have to say in reaction to the host. That’s often where the good (and brace yourself — also often absolutely outrageously shocking from a Vesuvian point of view) stuff lies. Not everyone on Mars gets it, particularly about Venus, but be patient and I think you will find many of them do. And those ones want nothing more than to help Vesuvians truly, truly, truly understand life on Mars. Ignore the static, search for the signals. If you do, I guarantee you’ll find that some of the best people in the universe can be found on Mars!

Safe travels! And if you find yourself in trouble, tell them Red Pill Girl (aka Bloom) sent you. If you follow all of the the advice above, while they may not serve it up sugar coated on Mars, chances are there will be someone there to help with translation or point you in the right way. If you don’t follow the advice above, I can’t help you. You will deserve what you get. You have been warned.

And remember, it’s going to be a wild and crazy adventure. Chances are you’ll never see life on Venus, or Mars, the same again.

(Here is where I hug you and wish you all the best, look you sternly in the eye one last time, then say, “and sister — don’t make me regret ever sharing Mars with you!”)

Oh and one last thing, if you read something you don’t like (and you will) remember hate message, not the messenger.