Make America Masculine Again

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Ok, true confessions. I am liking Trump more and more by the minute. I think I may be falling in love, actually! Lol. (Platonically, of course.)

By golly, I don’t just think he’s going to Make America Great Again, I think he’s going to bring back unapologetic masculinity, to boot!

Keep it up, Mr. President! It is long overdue!

Let those who have ears hear.

Please share your thoughts in the comments!

Reverse the Message

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Was the Women’s March really about women’s rights?

One poster featured a Muslim woman with her head draped in an American flag. Did any of the marchers proudly brandishing that poster stop to think what would likely happen to a woman in many Muslim countries who did such a thing? Or even in the US?

But I digress. American women actually have it pretty good, as far as rights go. More than pretty good. Much better than many women on the planet.

But rather than focusing on them, American women demanded, “What about us?”

What about you? Well, for one thing, there sure was a lot of offensive profanity about at an event where many brought their children. Not to mention all the vagina images, imagine explaining that one to your preschooler!

I suppose the point was to NOT be ladylike, because after all that is somehow now taboo, it seems. (Meanwhile the ladylike women of the day shined like beacons of light, in comparison, looking even more so by contrast, but I digress.)

The thing I find most interesting is how if the messages and signs and images were reversed, if let’s say HRC had won and men around the country marched in mass with signs saying, “Kill the Matriarchy!” and “She’s not MY president!” how would that have been received? Much less them dressing up and parading about as penises or sporting penis hats?

When one reverses the message, it suddenly sounds a lot like hate speech, doesn’t it? Interesting…

It’s a good litmus test. If a group’s message isn’t also acceptable in reverse, maybe it is not acceptable at all?

Let those who have ears hear.

 

 

Women Warriors

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Has anyone else noticed that almost all of the “kicking a** and taking names” leads in movies lately have been women? The new Star Wars movies are just an example.

Something else I have noticed lately is a plethora of “hot chicks with guns” memes. Now I suspect this may be along the same lines as “hot chicks with hot rods” or “hot chicks on bada** bikes” and so on, as it’s pretty unlikely women themselves are creating these memes.

But there is something about this that troubles me. For example, on a social media site I saw this image, along with the caption, “A happy woman is…”

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(Setting aside the debate of her hotness level, that I will leave up to the males to deliberate) the thing is while it at first glance is comforting to think, “heck yeah, I am gonna go get me some guns!” when I really pondered it, is this not just another form of “You go gurrrl!!!”?

For me anyway, happiness is not a warm gun. My preferred happiness is standing behind a big, strong, well fed, and well loved man with a gun.

Let’s be real, women are not and will never be warriors. We can be mean, nasty, and sneaky but women prefer their violence more on the passive aggressive side than on the hand-to-hand combat one.

Even early on, this can be seen if you observe pre-school aged children play. The boys love to play warrior while the girls stand in a huddle screaming and pretend to be the rescued damsels in distress.

I wish I had the link to a post from long ago about how women can best support a war effort — not by taking up arms but by bringing tea and sandwiches to the men. (The post is long gone now but maybe someone here remembers the incident the post was referring to?)

Let’s not fool ourselves, ladies. We need men (husbands, dads, brothers, sons) who love us deeply and fiercely enough to keep us safe. Men are not our enemy, they are our guardians.

And this could be a whole other post, but when little boys play warrior, don’t shame them. Build them up, make a fuss, and tell them how fabulous and brave they are. It won’t make them violent, it will make them men.

Let those who have ears hear.

What do you think? Please share in the comments.

 

Merit: A Better Path To Equality?

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Something I have believed and practiced all my life is this: I don’t seek or even want handouts, freebies, or help because I am a girl. Instead, I have always aimed to achieve based upon my own merit. Doing so has made me strong, not weak.

If you want better, be better — be among the best at what you want to be or do. Don’t use “XYZ” as an excuse why you can’t, and don’t let anyone else tell you that either.

All you need to do is just work harder than others are willing to. In college, I saw this quickly. Most people were barely trying. By putting in more effort (and not even 100% effort, to be honest, plus working 20 hours a week) I was honor roll, Dean’s list, and near the top of my class the whole time.

As a result of my working harder, my instructors sought me out to pour more effort into me than other students who weren’t trying, because they saw it would be worth their time. (Teachers LOVE students who are really trying, trust me!)

Later, managers, mentors, and others have done the same. These people were among the best at what they did too, and I have found they were usually thrilled to be able to pass their “lifetime brain dump” on to someone who they felt would do something with it. What an honor to be chosen! And chosen because they saw my potential, not because I demanded they help.

On the job, I took the same strategy. And it worked. I was promoted and managed people who had gone to Ivy League schools (Yes, me, who attended a small state no-name commuter college!), and who had more advanced degrees than I did. I never pointed this out, but it perplexed me why they weren’t trying harder? Why they weren’t working to be MY manager?

In reality, only about 20% of people are really trying, so you are only competing for what you want or dream of against those 20%, not 100%. And it’s pretty easy to be in the 20% simply because too many others aren’t willing to work to get there, persevere hardships and overcome challenges, and never give up or give in until they do.

I also accept my personal limitations. I have channeled my energy into things I am good at, where I can achieve most. For example, I am weak in math. So it would be silly for me to set my sights on being an engineer. I am not among the best at math. So what? One can’t be everything. I would only be a failure bc of it if I for some reason insisted to pursue a goal that required me to be better than those among the best at math. Right?

Plus, I am much happier doing things I am naturally good at. I would not like being an engineer. (No offense to engineers, I hope you LOVE it and are among the best in what you do, too!)

When one learns all this, and practices it, they find pretty quickly that it actually isn’t all that hard. And it is totally up to you.

Nobody “gives” you equality, you earn and create your own equality.

And when you earn it yourself, nobody can take it away either.

What do you think? Please share in the comments.

Why Has Equality Created Such Division?

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You’ve likely heard the saying, “The battle between the sexes.” I don’t hear it as much as I did when the push for equal rights for women was in its early decades, but I have been reflecting more and more these days on how equality movements seem to have have led to ever increasing division rather than ever increasing harmony.

The formal term for this is “identity politics” and it can be seen in so many of the issues humanity is struggling with most today.

If the current direction is leading to increasing problems, it only seems wise that everyone involved take another look at if what we are doing is really creating the intended outcome and if not, start asking if perhaps there is a better path?

What do you think? Please share in the comments!

 

A Divorce Story

A gal I met recently through work (not the gal I have written about before considering frivorce) called to tell me she is getting divorced.

This took me by surprise because as far as I could see, they were a happy family. They have a son (8) and a daughter (6) who I had always assumed were both theirs, but she just revealed the son is from his previous marriage. (Note the odd timing, was he still married when they met?)

She had shown me the photos from their beautiful wedding just a few years ago. They have been together since before the daughter was born, but only married 2-3 years ago.

As she went on about how it was all him, how he was a narcissist, how he has been physically violent, how she had to file a restraining order, how he is having an affair, how he was upset because she is still in the home with all of his belongings, how he is keeping her from seeing the son, and on and on… I couldn’t help but wonder if she herself wasn’t the narcissist leaving a scorched earth behind her as she blew up her marriage?

I can’t say why exactly this thought crossed my mind. Perhaps it was how the whole tale centered around her as the victim, or how it was 100% all his fault, or how she didn’t once mention how the kids were doing, or seem concerned about how all this was affecting them, or how she was seemingly trying to “build her case” as the blameless and helpless victim, or exactly what it was.

Just on a hunch I checked her Facebook. She has already wiped it clean of all photos of the wedding, her ex, the son, etc. All that remained were photos of her or her and the daughter, appearing as if they had been just the two of them all along. Gone were many many photos that I know were there not too long ago because she had shown me. In fact, her prior Facebook was a carefully created picture of family bliss. Not a hint of anything wrong in Denmark. And now, less than a week after the split, it has been scrubbed of any mention of a recent marriage or divorce.

Odd.

In the past I would have automatically believed her tale, but after hearing such tales from the other side around the manosphere, I now take things with a grain of salt.

Maybe it is as she said. I am not denying such things happen.

But, and this is just a hunch, she’s recently started working with a very successful and very single man whose business is taking off. Could this perhaps be the real motive behind the split? Sadly, it would not surprise me. I am sure all will come out in time. It always does.

Sigh.

 

 

Men Live to Oppress You!

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Men live to oppress you!

Or that’s what they say, anyway.

And since we are talking taboos, I may as well add it only means “white men” but nobody says that because, duh, it’s obvious!

So really the message is, “White men live to oppress you!”

But do they? Really? Or are they a scapegoat? Just another group to “vilify” to take focus off of the real stuff. Like the world is basically an international s#it show, and getting worse by the day?

Or am I the only one seeing it that way? Is this utopia? Equality? Peace? Love? Rainbows? Getting along?

After 40 years of govt. support, are we there yet? If not, what is missing? Same for women’s rights? At what point will it be right? Never? Now? Someday?

What is the objective? To splinter apart with increasing hate, or to turn the page and realize for the most part none of us were even born then or if so, were certainly at best just a child and unable to change much?

Do humans need “a scapegoat?” Or can we evolve past that?

Please share your thoughts in the comments.

 

 

Fried Ice

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There is a saying in the manosphere, and it is this: Women want fried ice.

What that means is women want the sexy bad boy who is just out of reach, but who is also the secretly committed sensitive guy who wants to talk about her feelz….

The mysterious Alpha/beta in one man, on perfect demand with her hormonal cycle.

Now it seems to have even gone beyond that to people wanting fried ice in general. Big govt. that solves all but never interferes. A nanny state that only controls “others.”

Fried ice. It doesn’t exist. One must choose….is it the wide or narrow gate?

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“Yes, there are but two paths that you can go on, but in the long run there’s always time to change the road you’re on.”  ~ Led Zepplin

 

Reverse Privilege

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Before the red pill, like most blue pill folk I thought equality movements were really about equality — that the goal was that everyone regardless of class, or race, or sex, or (insert XYZ factor here) would have equal opportunity.

But more and more I see “equality movements” today seem to be less about that, and more about the once oppressed seeking to become the new oppressors.

Two wrongs don’t make a right. Two wrongs just make everything that much worse.

The Error of Apex Fallacy

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If you haven’t heard the term “apex fallacy” before, it means the misbelief that the experiences of those at the top are, could, or should be the experiences of all.

For example, women have been told things like:

All men play the field, so it’s only fair for women to play the field just like men do. Except the reality is it is really only the very most attractive or wealthy or high status men who can easily play the field with as many women as they like. Most guys, even guys who are self proclaimed pick up experts, actually have to work very hard and get rejected many many times before they succeed. So women who are “playing the field just like a guy does” actually don’t realize that finding a guy willing to have sex with an average woman is not nearly as difficult as finding a woman who is willing to have sex with an average guy.

Another example is in career expectations. Many women have been led to believe all men have exciting, fulfilling, top level, upper management, high level, well paid, white collar, CEO type jobs and so women should expect to have the same. But again this is apex fallacy at play. In fact few men have jobs in that category. Most men work average, not very exciting, not very empowering, not very fulfilling jobs. All men do NOT have top level jobs and yet women have been mislead to believe that all women deserve top level jobs or it’s “not equal.”

Or consider the claim that, “men can do whatever they want.” In reality very few men can do whatever they want. Such men would need to have the power, wealth, status, connections, etc. to get away with doing so. Most men do not have these things and are restricted by the limitations of life like most people.

Once one starts looking for apex fallacy, the examples can be found all over the place. So while girls may be told “you can have it all” the reality is very few people have it all. Such apex fallacy sets women up for a lifetime of feeling cheated and oppressed, underappreciated and underpaid, held back and victimized when in reality they are doing as well, or even better, than the average man.

Apex fallacy. Don’t buy it!

Can you think of some more examples of apex fallacy? Please share in the comments.